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All of the producers and production crew had been working hard to ensure that the final of the Charity Gunge Grand Prix was the messiest it could possible be, lots of votes had been cast throughout the competition and after many rounds now only 2 potential candidates remained as the finalists.
One woman who had been nominated and had reached the Semi-Final stage was Rachel Riley, the producers decided to call her up.
“Hi Rachel, it’s Mandy from CGGP I would like to invite you to join us for the grand finale”
Rachel’s face dropped she had been so keen to avoid getting messy and if she had made the final, she would now only have a 50% of staying clean.
“I guess I don’t have a choice if the viewers have voted for me to make the final” she said rather reluctantly, but Mandy spoke up to clarify that she wasn’t asking Rachel to be a finalist and explained that had hoped she would agree to host the final.
“Oh fantastic! Yes, I absolutely would love to be the host if this means I can come on the show gunge the winner and stay clean myself” her mood shifting dramatically in a split second, a relieved Rachel got off the phone with the knowledge she would be having a fun Sunday evening.
—
Rachel Riley stood on stage wearing a bright yellow tight dress, which emphasized her perfect figure, she was waiting for the producer to give her the go ahead.
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“Hello, and welcome to the grand final of this years Charity Gunge Grand Prix.
I am your host for the night, Rachel Riley, and I am very happy to be here tonight in a hosting capacity, why you might ask?
Well I was knock out in the Semi Final, and that meant I came close to being a participant in the final, however thank you to all the viewers out there who helped to avoid making that happen.
However, we do have two ladies who have made it to the final, and the good news for them is that no matter what both ladies will walk away tonight with a cool £50,000 for their chosen charity.
Unfortunately for them that is about the only good piece of news, as one of them will be winning our grand prize and therefore becoming the champion of course with a name like ‘Charity Gunge Grand Prix’ the winner won’t be walking away with a nice gold trophy.
She will be going down our ramp and being deposited into this large smelly gunk pit.” The camera cut to a drone that was now hovering above the gunk and allowed the viewers to see just how horrible it looked with its thick skin of brown and green gunk resting on the top. In white writing the words ‘CGGP Champion’ were emblazoned on it.
Rachel continued to explain the viewers. “As you see we have two seats both at the bottom of a ramp the finalists will sit in one, we will then have a quiz and the first one to reach the top will become our ‘winner’”. She said smirking at the thought of the prize on offer.
“The runner up might manage to stay clean depending on how she performs, as we have a few surprises for the contestants as they move on up the ramp”
After this Rachel turned away from the dunk gunk and faced the audience directly, “I think it is time we meet our first finalist, don’t you?” The audience roared with approval eager to find out which two had reached the final.
Rachel welcomed out onto the stage the actress Hayley Atwell, the busty 38-year-old approached Rachel nervously, she had been rather reluctant to come on but with it being for charity she knew she had little choice but to be a good sport.
She was wearing high heels, some black jeans and a red blouse, looking as stylish as she always did and was hoping that she would manage to stay clean as she had only been informed after her arrival that they would not be provided clothes during the show after the yellow/blue tops had not arrived.
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Rachel announced that during the competition that Hayley had won her group stage before knocking out Lily James in the second round, Katherine Ryan in the third round and then pipped competition favourite Jennifer Lawrence in the fourth round.
After the women discussed some of the roles that Hayley had played during her successful career, she was then told to make herself comfortable on one of the seats on the ramp whilst Rachel moved to invite the second finalist on the stage.
“Please give a warm welcome for surprise finalist and elite sportswoman Sam Quek!“ Rachel announced.
A former England international hockey player, who had recently become more well known for her wide-ranging sports interest and TV roles such as I’m a Celeb although mainly led by her love of football and Liverpool meant she was now a more household name than during her hockey career.
Sam walked out to a slightly smaller cheer than Hayley had received but still loud enough that meant she was in no doubt the audience would be happy no matter who ended up in the goo, she was 7 years younger than Hayley and was hoping that might help her when it came to avoiding the gunk.
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Rachel announced that after qualifying from her group stage she had knocked out Chloe Moretz in the second round, followed by gunge legend herself Holly Willoughby in round Three before pipping Sian Welby in the fourth round.
Sam was wearing her open high heels, some white skinny jeans and a smart black top, with a beige jacket over it, she looked a little more relaxed than Hayley evidently her time in the jungle had shown she was more open for weird things.
She hugged Rachel and joked with her about trading places, but the blonde host shut that idea down quickly as the two moved onto speaking about Sam’s post playing career as she tried to increase her fame she was enthused about coming on the show and doing her bit for charity albeit with the aim of staying clean herself, Rachel informed Sam that she would now be allowed to wear her jacket and so she removed it, revealing more of her smart black sleeveless top.
After a small break the show resumed with both Hayley and Sam now seated in their respective seats overlooking the gunk dunk, both considerably less comfortable than they had been when they walked onto the stage.
“Now ladies you are going to take turns to be asked a question if you get it correct you will be staying where you are, and your opponent will be moved up to the next level. However, if you answer it incorrectly your opponent will stay in their current position and you instead will be moved upwards.
Once you reach the fourth and final level you will be crowned our Charity Gunge Grand Prix Champion and will immediately get to claim your prize.”
As she finished speaking, she gestured to the tank from her podium making it clear to the women that the winner would be getting very messy.
“Now then in order to decide who should get to go first in answering a question we need to do something; I know the first one of you to raise her arm and tell me how amazing I am is the winner”
There was a slight pause as the two women didn’t realise, she was serious before they both shot their hands up into the air shouting “You are amazing” at Rachel.
“Why thank you both so much, very kind of you to say” Rachel jokingly replied before she announced that Sam had beaten Hayley who sporting pedigree standing out over the actress, who winced knowing it was now potentially out of her hands if Sam could answer all the questions correctly.
“okay Sam, here is your first question
When did Liverpool last win the Premier League?”
Sam began to say an answer before stopping herself, she then confidently replied “This is a trick question Liverpool have never won the Premier league.
Rachel smiled at Sam “I am very happy to say that is the correct answer Sam, and long may it continue.” This led to a scowl from Sam as she remembered that Rachel supported Manchester United just as much as she did Liverpool.
“Unfortunately, Hayley that means you will be moving up to the second tier, and we also have a nice surprise for you too”. Rachel smugly announced.
Hayley put her head in her hands as the chair was cranked up to the second tier, the audience cheering as it did so when suddenly a small wave of red gunge splashed down onto the top of her head, her face screwed up in disgust as the slimy liquid coated the top of her head.
Whilst it was fairly watered down the gunge still dribbled down the front of her and onto her top when the pouring had finished a now slightly gungey Hayley wiped it away from her eyes trying to flick the mess off her hands for fear of wiping it back onto herself again, her mind now intently set on avoiding the gunk dunk in front of her.
Rachel moved to ask Hayley her question which the actress was able to guess thanks to it being themed around her marvel character Peggy Carter and so it was her time to smile as she looked at Sam who flinched expecting the gunge to drop on her.
The chair slowly moved up into position as the audience chanted ‘Crank her up’ at Rachel’s instruction, once in position Sam relaxed a little thinking that the gunge was only for Hayley, however this was a mistake and green gunge of a similar mixture to the red on Hayley dropped down onto her.
She squealed as the cold goo dribble down her back further arching her front, only ensuring the gunge slid all the way down her back and into the back of her jeans, feeling the slimey muck on her bum as she now sat considerably less comfortably on her seat, Sam awaited her second question.
The sportswoman had a look of panic as she heard Rachel speak, and so it came as no surprise to anyone when she failed to correctly answer the question. “Oh crap” she said loudly to the audience’s amusement as then once again started to chant ‘crank her up’ led by the thrilled conductor Rachel.
Hayley relaxed a little as she looked over to her left seeing Sam moving above her for the first time, now only two steps away from the top, suddenly a loud shriek was heard from Sam as a larger torrent of custard that matched Rachel’s dress colour slopped down onto her head, her dark hair quickly disappearing under the flow as more of her top took a hit compared to the gunge.
As Rachel turned to ask Hayley her second question Sam shifted nervously in her seat, now well aware that if Hayley was able to answer it correctly, she would be only one position away from going into the gunk dunk.
Her fears were almost confirmed when Hayley confidently answered Rachel’s questions.
“Well done Hayley that was a good answer” she nodded her head as if to say she knew that but Rachel then added “Unfortunately we aren’t looking for good answers, we need perfect answers and so that is incorrect, what do we do with her ladies and gentlemen?”
Hayley looked shocked as Sam punched the air at earning a slight reprieve as the audience started their familiar chant Hayley shook her head in disappointment completely forgetting that she faced a downpour of cold custard like Sam when she reached her second stop.
The custard contrasted with the red gunge on her red top as it slid down from the top of her head dripping down onto the tip of her nose as she sat with her eyes closed waiting for it to stop pouring, her black jeans now housing a custard pool as she helplessly unable to stop the cold substance from seeping inside her clothes and against her underwear.
It was time for the 5th question, Sam’s third the topic was space with Rachel reading out the question, Hayley was glad she did not get asked it as she had no idea and judging from Sam’s look, she also was unsure.
However, as Rachel pressured Sam for an answer she hesitantly gave ‘Titan’ as one shrugging her shoulders as she did so.
“Wow, well done Sam I get the feeling that was a lucky guess, it is the largest of Saturn’s moons.” To which Sam’s grin and nod confirmed Rachel’s theory.
“But that means for you Hayley it’s time to crank you up” She shouted as the chair began to rise and Hayley sported an anxious expression as the chair came to rest now just one level away from the top and her being crowned the champion.
This time her surprise was thick chunky slime, made from mixing gunge with porridge to ensure the horrible substance felt as bad as it looked as it cascaded down onto Hayley’s head, she tried to look forward as she shrivelled up in disgust as the thick blue mixture slopped down onto her.
“I can see you didn’t like that one Hayley, but I can tell you if you don’t get the next question correct you will be facing some much worse than our chunky slime”
The usually immaculately styled brown eyed woman was now perilously close to the gunk dunk and her nervous were beginning to show as she asked Rachel to repeat the question as she tried to think of the answer, the chunky slime had managed to flow inside her top and as a heavy substance had pulled the loose material down exposing more of Hayley’s large cleavage.
“I can confirm Hayley that answer was….
….Incorrect” Rachel finished after a long and painful delay for Hayley.
Hayley put her messy head in her hands as she felt the chair crank up one again as the audience now changed their chant to ‘Gunk her, gunk her” repeatedly as Sam cheered wildly before starting to chant as well.
After the chair slotted into place Rachel spoke to Hayley. “Congratulations Hayley, you are the winner of the Charity Gunge Grand Prix, how do you feel and are you ready to collect your prize?” she added gleefully.
Hayley shook her head as she spoke “No, I can’t believe I am the winner, thanks to everyone who voted for me to get this far. I guess at least the money will still be good for my charity I only wish I’d been in Sam’s place right now and not here.”
After this the sparks on the chair dramatically flashed as she began to move forwards, it picked up momentum before reaching the bottom of the ramp and flung the helpless and shrieking Hayley into the gunk dunk face first, which quieted her screams as she took a mouthful of the gunk.
She pierced the surface feeling the thick congealed messy skin on the tank against her face before disappearing under the surface as the chunky mixed mess engulfed her, Hayley felt the icky substance which now soaked her clothes as she reappeared to a thunderous applause, she felt so disgusted as the smelly mixture rose up to her chest.
She could tell that not only were her jeans and blouse ruined but her matching purple bra and thong would be unlikely to survive to messing as she tried desperately to wipe some of the mess form her face and hair.
Unbeknownst to Hayley whilst she was trying to regain her composure Sam had been handed a button by the production crew.
“Sam how would you like to offer your congratulations to the winner, as a close runner up how do you feel?”
“Hayley, I would like to say you really deserve to be the winner, I am honoured to be runner up to you, and I am very happy to offer my own congratulations to you” and with that she pressed her button.
I hopper stored above the gunk dunk opened up and a mix of porridge, beans and gunge rained down onto the top of Hayley from above as the onslaught of sudden mess took her by surprise as causing her to dunk herself under the mess once again before reappearing completely covered for a second time, only eventually wiping her eyes when brave enough to hope the mess had finished.
The audience were all holding their camera’s as they tried to take photos of the beautiful and sophisticated actress now covered in all kind of sloppy gunk as she stood holding her ruined blouse in place.
Sam had now joined Rachel on the main stage “Well Sam you didn’t manage to escape fully clean but I’m sure the £50,000 will be good compensation for your chosen charity”
“Thanks Rachel, I’m a little disappointed to have not managed to stay completely clean but I’m hopeful I should be able to get my clothes cleans which is something I doubt Hayley will be able to do” she added with a smirk before heading off the stage to get cleaned up.
Rachel then turned to the destroyed Hayley who had been helped out of the tank and was now standing dripping all kinds of mess onto the floor, as Rachel stepped back far enough to be safe from any splashes, she thanked Hayley for being a great sport, the actress had a pained face that suggested she wasn’t exactly enjoying the experience.
As Hayley then moved to go and get cleaned up, she was called back by Rachel and told the shocked actress that before going to get cleaned off she needed to head into the ‘selfie zone’ so that members of the audience come down and pose alongside the new champion…
The show ended with a reply and close up from several angles detailed Hayley’s trip into the gunk dunk from a tankside camera and one fitted to the chair that showed a close up of her custard covered bum being flung from the chair and her ungraceful flight into the mess.
As Rachel let a production staff member manoeuvre the sloppy Hayley into the ‘selfie zone’ as she made a hasty exit keen to ensure she remained clean.