Quantcast
Channel: TellyGunge
Viewing all 2340 articles
Browse latest View live

Hollys House Party: Season 1 Episode 3 Conclusion

$
0
0

Although this story mentions real persons, corporations, TV shows and places, it is purely a work of fiction for personal enjoyment. The story does NOT describe real events and should NOT be taken to accurately portray any real entity mentioned. In keeping with its fictional nature, the events and activities described in the story may not be legal, ethical or safe. This site does NOT endorse or recommend their enactment.

Holly’s House Party returned from commercial, with he Panel Beaters music playing and the audience clapping. Holly,

4f7c27c8aa9e409fd82a59b6cbeda53e (1)

the celeb panel of Arielle Free, Dianne Buswell, and Pixie Lott

20200513_225918

And the group of contestants

20200516_152316

all eagerly awaited to begin again.

Holly began, “Well ladies and gentlemen, we were just about to find out who the real cheerleader of our group is. Our celebs believe its Christy, and if theyre right, they are spared a messy trip and our contestants get gunged. But if theyre wrong, then Im afraid theyll be going on the trip instead. Now, its time for the moment of truth: Christy, are you an actual cheerleader?” Christy smiled sheepishly before answering.

“Yes.”

The panel erupted in cheers, as did the audience. Holly waited for it all to die down before she spoke. “Wow, great work ladies! You get to escape. And you seem thrilled, is that correct!” “Oh yes” exclaimed Pixie. “Thats great” Holly responded. “Cause celebs, you’re off. And our ladies who didnt beat the panel, get on cause youre going through.” The Panel Beater music began again as the two sides switched places. The sight of the “cheerleaders” walking from behind as they went into the vehicle evoked more hoots and whistles from the crowd. These cheers caused Laura to quickly and cheekily shake her butt with both hands, while Nicole smiled and waved at the crowd. All four ladies took their places. Laura and Nicole seemed ready to go through, Christy seemed uncomfortable but still had a brave face on, while Anna seemed apprehensive. “Well girls” began Holly “Fortunately some of you aren’t wearing too much attire. Really, think of it as a Gatorade bath! Take em away!”

The girls yelped as the vehicle suddenly lurched backwards. As this happened, the wall moved upward, revealing the cavalcade of mess they were about to enter. Sprinkles of slimy and sticky water rained down, and that was followed by rotating jets of light green gunge.The cart entered the cascade of slimy water, and it brought the girls into that cascade. They all yelped again as the liquid hit them. It matted their hair and splattered their clothes and any bare skin. Next, the rotating jets hit them with light and thin green gunge. The girls were completely soaked mere moments after entering the cascade. It splashed their heads, their faces, their chests, stomachs, backs, and legs. Gunge ran down and pooled underneath where they sat, creating an awkwardand uncomfortable feeling. The gunge felt a bit overwhelming for the poor girls, as it hit rapidly and from every direction.

The cart then stopped at the back of the track. The girls caught their breath, with Laura, Nicole, and Christy all seemed to laugh while seeming surprised at the thoroughness of the gunging. Anna smiled, but it was mixed with shock and horror. Seconds after the car stopped, more jets of gunge rained down. This gunge, however, was more akin to the usual gunge on the House Party, thick and viscous. A stream of purple gunge hit Laura square on the head, Christy got red gunge poured on her head, and Nicole got yellow gunge poured all over her. Each girl screamed as the gunge hit in a surprising manner. Despite the fact there were four girls and only three jets, Nicole made sure to pull Anna into the stream of yellow gunge, ensuring both girls got bathed in the sludge, much to Anna’s distaste.

All four ladies were drenched in the various colors of gunge. “Oh my god” Laura uttered between laughs. Their hair, faces and bodies dripped with the substance. Laura and Nicole seemed to enjoy the experience, they viewed it as an adventure. Christy and Anna didnt seem as pleased, Christy had a sad smile, while Anna looked disgusted at the feeling of gunge in her hair, on her face, and soaking into her outfit. The latter two weren’t overly thrilled with being sopping wet and feeling the thick gunge over their hair, face and bodies. “Oh I pity them.” chuckled Holly, who spoke to the celebs “That could have been you!” The three celebs chuckled, with just hints of relief of nervousness.

The vehicle moved forward, back into the cascade of sticky water and rotating jets of green gunge. The girls were now given a fresh coat of slime as they were moved. The vehicle eventually stopped in the middle of the storm of mess, leaving the girls to be bombarded with liquid. Laura raised her arms in enjoyment, Christy still looked subdued, Anna a bit unhappy, and Nicole was laughing, turning her face upwards and generally enjoying the experience. She rubbed the slimy liquid all over her body and slicked the gunge through her hair. Moments later, Laura, followed by Nicole, left the vehicle. They were dripping gunge, and their bare skin glistened with the mess. The crowd whistled and hooted at the sight of the attractive, wet, and scantily-clad ladies standing before them, and the two ladies seemed to enjoy the attention. The two girls went over to the celeb panel and hugged them, getting some mess on the celebs clothes.

Holly began to walk away laughing. She passed the vehicle that still remained in the shower of gunge, with Christy and Anna still getting showered. Christy slicked back her hair while Anna shook her head in disgust. “Well, there’s quite a bit of incentive to win that game.” stated Holly who headed to the next segment. “And there will plenty of gunge next week on the House Party…”

Note from the network: Next week on the House Party, the Battle of the Soaps goes international, and someone will be getting gunged. All this and more!


Let’s hope Natalie Pirks Up when she meets her look alike with some help from Sally, Holly (Not That One) and Hurricane Maura Part 2 – The Gungings

$
0
0

Although this story mentions real persons, corporations, TV shows and places, it is purely a work of fiction for personal enjoyment. The story does NOT describe real events and should NOT be taken to accurately portray any real entity mentioned. In keeping with its fictional nature, the events and activities described in the story may not be legal, ethical or safe. This site does NOT endorse or recommend their enactment.This story will contain scenes of nudity and/or a sexual nature. 

Please note that this story contains some Jamaican Patwa slang. It is intended to mock Aisleyne for being ghetto and trying to come across as a wannabe black person. It is in no way intended to be offensive to any black people.

Maura Higgins, Sally Bundock and Holly Hamilton met online for their daily video call chat. Holly and Sally signed in first and were then joined by Maura who was bent over by her screen holding her bum hole open. “And they call me Slutty” Sally said laughing. “Got you Maura” Holly added. “I cannot believe I fell for my own rude sign in joke” Maura responded laughing and letting go of her bum sheets, pulling her thong back up, letting her dress fall back down and sanitizing her fingers.

“Did you get that latest Ann Summers sex toy I send you Slutty?” Maura asked Sally. “Yes it’s great” replied Sally smiling. “I know it is” said Maura and flicked on a video showing Sally pleasuring herself inside with the toy. “The prototype camera dildo” Maura proclaimed. “The battery only lasts 10 minutes and as you went so deep it ran out sooner” she added. “You bitch, you will delete that footage but send me a copy first” Sally replied laughing. “You didn’t send me one of those toys?” Holly asked. “No the camera doesn’t work up the bum” Sally responded. “Very funny” Holly replied.

Just then Aisleyne Horgan-Wallace from Big Brother and BBC Sports Reporter Natalie Pirks signed in. Maura had joked that they looked alike and the two ladies had agreed to impersonate each other and answer questions about the person they were portraying with wrong answers resulting in a Lockdown Gunging.

They all howled with laughter when they saw Natalie as Aisleyne. She had bravely put on a dress which barely kept her in and was imitating Aisleyne at her Autobiography Launch. Having even printed out copies of the book’s cover and stuck them on a board behind her. Natalie speaking in a fake Jamaican accent mocking Aisleyne’s Ghetto Queen persona , kissed her teeth several times, did some comic twerking and said “Is it because I is black?”

“You cow” Aisleyne shouted literally crying with laughter. “Get over yourself little girl” Natalie replied. “I is in need of a fag” Natalie added and sat down took out a plastic e-cigarette, crossed her legs to show she was wearing no knickers and held the fag between her legs saying “Ghetto princess can smoke outta dat hole too”

“She is a bigger tart than me that is brilliant” Aisleyne said in absolute hysterics. Natalie kissed her teeth and said “Whatever”. “I told you she was a scream” Holly added.

Aisleyne meanwhile had gone for the sporty look in skimpy workout gear to represent Natalie’s Sports Reporter background. She pulled some scowling faces to represent Natalie’s facial expressions and had written Class A Top Quality on the weight she carried with her mocking Natalie’s Colombian husband’s real career as alleged by the girls joking. Diego her husband roared with laughter when she saw this and when Aisleyne spoke in a mock Cockney accent she had decided to give her version of Natalie he was doubled over in hysterics as Aisleyne said “Call me a hard faced cow, my stare could curdle jellied eels. My boat race is like this as I gut fish down Billingsgate each morning.” She then took a line of flour and put it on her top lip and said “Diego brings me serious shit, goes down great after my Ruby Murray”

“Brilliant” shouted Natalie. “I never knew I was a cockney” she added. “Well I had to give you some accent to make it funny” Aisleyne replied. “That is so funny” Diego said appearing next to Natalie in a 1980’s designer suit mocking his heritage. “I’m on my own here. So I couldn’t get anyone to play Diego” Aisleyne said. “Are you happy for us to rip that shit out of you Diego?” she added. “Of course Natalie and Aisleyne are going to be no holds barred” he replied.

“Where are your girls Natalie?” Sally asked. “They are painting in the kitchen. We can see them from the garden” Natalie replied. “Yes when you flashed your fanny I did wonder where the girls were?” Holly said. “I had to wax da punani otherwise when I smoke through it. Da punani catches fire no Squatch down there” Natalie said impersonating Aisleyne again and uncrossing her legs to give everyone a shot of her vagina,

“Would you Adam and Eve it, I had to stop Diego putting his Hampton Wick up my Jack Danny so I could Chas and Dave my Barnet. But I let him shove it up my Kyber instead even if it Lionel Blair’s up my Emma Freuds” Aisleyne said. She pulled down her shorts to reveal she had written. “Hard faced ****” above her fanny. “I knew this would be funny ” Maura added.

“Right we are going to ask you a few questions about the characters you are portraying and any you get wrong you’ll get gunged or have to gunge yourself” Sally said. “I is like thick. I wrote dat book but I can’t read dem words” Natalie said. ” I’m not good using my loaf” Aisleyne added and lit a cigarette and had it dropping out of her mouth. “I don’t smoke” Natalie laughed. “Well what has made you look that old” Aisleyne joked. “Right” said Natalie and opened her legs and put the plastic cigarette just inside her fanny lips adding “Da Ghetto queen smokes out of dis hole”. “I can actually do that” said Maura lighting a cigarette and dropping her thong, lifting her dress up and demonstrating smoking from her vagina.

“Maura!” Holly said trying not to laugh. “Okay first question to Natalie. Where was Aisleyne born?” Sally asked “Blood Clot, I was born in Kingston, Jamaica” Natalie said laughing. “Incorrect Aisleyne was born in London” Sally replied. “You now have to have something poured over you by Diego” Sally continued. “My Baby father’s goat curry” said Natalie as Diego emptied a big pot of cold curry over Natalie’s head. It flattened down her elaborate hair do, ran down her face, rapidly carrying on down into her dress forming a nice covering on her boobs. “Me Titi covered with curry. But no squatch on my punani” Natalie said again uncrossing and crossing her legs to show her vagina lips.

“Okay Aisleyne. Where was Natalie born?” Sally asked “Within the sound of Bow Bells would be the obvious answer. But I’ll say Isle of Dogs as I like to get my Thrupenny Bits out when I go Dogging down there” Aisleyne replied. “No actually it was Aylesbury” Sally replied. “I’ve got to pour something over my Uncle Ned?” Aisleyne asked. “Yes if you would” Sally said. “Some good old Pie and Mash Gravy” said Aisleyne and emptied a bucket of green gunge over her head. “Oh my bloody thrupennies are taters” said Aisleyne pushing her big boobs up.

“Ma Tities and punani are overs” Natalie said removing her dress to sit there naked. Diego blinked in shout as his wife was starkers next to him on a video call with her friends. “What year was Aisleyne born?” Sally asked. “I was born in da year 1969 as I am well old and wrinkled except ma punani” Natalie said again opening her legs. “I’m sorry that is wrong it was 1978” Sally responded. “Get da beef jerky over my head” Natalie replied laughing as Diego emptied a bucket of cold dark gravy over her head. Natalie shuddered as it hit her and ran down her face. “I rub it in ma titties” she said and lavishly rubbed her boobs together as the gravy ran down her. “I is black” she added as the girls roared with laughter.

“Okay what year was Natalie born?” Sally asked Aisleyne. “My boat race is well lived in so I’d say I was born under the sounds of air raid sirens in 1943” Aisleyne replied. “No it was 1979” Sally said. “Okay I’ll empty a bag of Diego’s class A shit over my Ned” Aisleyne said and emptied a bag of flour over her head. “Oh and you’ll want to see my flange too. Most of the men from Smithfield Meat Market have” Aisleyne added pulling her workout shorts off to reveal a clean shaven muff. “It’s Alf Garnett” she said. “Mine a Peel Head” Natalie added.

“Okay which famous singer was Aisleyne friends with?” Sally asked Natalie “Robert Nesta Marley” Natalie replied. “No it was Amy Winehouse” Sally replied. “Rice and Peas” Natalie said and emptied a packet of rice over her head and Diego followed with a bucket of mushy peas. Natalie again massaged them into her breasts and rubbed some “In Da Punani”.

“Which band did Natalie see live at Wembley Stadium last year” Sally asked Aisleyne. “Chas and Dave” Aisleyne replied. “No it was the Spice Girls” Sally responded. “Lets have some fish guts from Billingsgate” said Aisleyne emptying a bucket of fish guts over her head. The smell made her wretch “No that’s my fanny” she joked. She then took her top off and rubbed the fish guts into her impressively enhanced breasts.

“Back to Natalie or should I say Aisleyne. What did Aisleyne describe as the scariest moment of her life?” Sally asked “Da Ghetto Queen not Fraidy Fraidy but when I realize I is not black but white” Natalie replied. “No it was when she entered the Big Brother House” Sally responded. “Jerk Baked Beans” Natalie said laughing as Diego emptied a bucket of baked beans over Natalie’s head. The beans flattened down her hair totally and some fell loose. She sat there naked in a totally disheveled state beans dripping from her face, boobs and body loving every minute.

“What did Natalie say was the biggest surprise she ever had?” Sally asked Aisleyne. “Keeping my virginity until 1956” Aisleyne added. “No it was when her family were linked up with her during the last World Cup” Sally corrected her. “Actually it was when I smuggled 1 kg of coke back from there up my flange for Diego” Aisleyne joked. “Okay I got this from the market stall” she added emptying a bucket of rotten fruit over her head and rubbing it in raunchily to her body.

“So it is a sudden death tie break with the score still 0-0” Sally said. “The tie break question is who is the biggest slapper” she added. “You” they both screamed pointing at Sally on the screen. “Correct. I am officially the biggest slut in this video call” Sally added. “Okay I’ll ask a question who uses the most peroxide?” Holly said. “You” Natalie and Aisleyne screamed pointing at Holly. “Yes that is correct” Holly responded laughing.

“Okay let me sort this out. Who owns the biggest vibrator?” Maura asked. Natalie produced a large black vibrator but Aisleyne produced a larger one with some white power on the penis tip. “Okay Aisleyne has won. So Diego please empty what you have left over Natalie” Maura instructed him.

Diego picked up two cartons of custard and emptied them over Natalie’s head. The custard ran down her face and onto her boobs. She fingered some into her belly button and up her fanny. He then presented Natalie with a cream cake. She put it on her chair and sat down splat on it. Grabbing handfuls of cream and lavishly rubbing it onto her breasts and face. She wriggled around on the cake and opened and closed her legs several times concluding “Da Ghetto Queen is well messy”.

“And you too Aisling empty what you have got left over your head” Maura instructed her. Aisling picked up a 5 litre container of cooking oil and slowly emptied it over her head and let it sensually run down her body. Although it was clear, it gave her gunge covered body a lovely bright sticky sheen. She then emptied two litres of cream over her head, rubbing the white liquid into her breasts and dripping some onto the end of her tongue and then licking her nipples. She ended by getting two egg custards and ramming one into her face and the other into her fanny. “I’m Hank Marvin with all this food on me” she concluded.

“Has everyone had fun?” Holly asked. “Yes, it’s nice to watch and not get messy for once” Sally said. Suddenly Holly creamed as her husband had sneaked up on her and planted a trifle on her head. It messed up her blonde hair and cream slowly oozed down her face. “Good job my boy’s are out down the park” Sally said joking. Suddenly her door bell rang and she said “Excuse me”. She returned 30 seconds later with a trifle in her face. “Maura, you bitch you texted my eldest and got him to do that” she shouted laughing. “Of course” said Maura sticking a trifle on her head as all the ladies signed off laughing.

Tiswas/OTT Charity Revival Part 15 – The Finale Part 1

$
0
0

Although this story mentions real persons, corporations, TV shows and places, it is purely a work of fiction for personal enjoyment. The story does NOT describe real events and should NOT be taken to accurately portray any real entity mentioned. In keeping with its fictional nature, the events and activities described in the story may not be legal, ethical or safe. This site does NOT endorse or recommend their enactment.This story will contain scenes of nudity and/or a sexual nature. 

“Welcome back to the 15th and hopefully final part of Tiswas/OTT Charity Revival” said a rather weary looking Chris Tarrant. “Can we please have the lovely Rochelle Humes back on stage” Chris announced. The pregnant, naked and gunge covered Rochelle walked back on stage dragging a chair behind her. “I even have to bring on my own ******* props” she joked. “Take a seat Rochelle. Although you already have” Chris joked. Rochelle sat down laughing. “We’ve got a few extra people wanting to join your Baby Shower” Chris added.

“Please welcome Denise Van Outen” Chris said. The messy and naked Denise walked on carrying two buckets. “Denise Van Outen 45 years old and one child” Denise announced. “I hope there is no elephant spunk in either of them” Rochelle joked. “No something a bit more sticky” Denise replied and emptied a bucket of honey over Rochelle’s head. The light brown liquid slowly ran over Rochelle’s already matted and destroyed hair and gently cascaded down her body. “Here have this as well” Denise said and threw a bucket of coconut milk over Rochelle. “That was supposed to be water” Rochelle said laughing. “Oh silly me” Denise replied and ran off to get a bucket of water. She returned and threw it other Rochelle’s legs to leave her messy.

“Next up we have Professor Kate Williams” Chris announced. The leggy academic walked on in her gunged white mini dress again carrying two buckets. “Professor Kate Williams Sexy Ginger 41 and one child” she announced. “I seem to be overdressed “she added and unzipped her dress and wiggled out of it to stand there in a white bra and pants. Rosamund Pike and Thandie Newton lead a “Get Em Off Prof” chant. “I think I will set them free. For all of you to see” Prof Kate said removing her bra to reveal a pair of impressive sized breasts. “Get your ginger muff out” Rochelle shouted. “I won’t be doing that but I’ll be doing this” Prof Kate replied and dropped her knickers to reveal her muff was dyed in LGBT colours. All the girls cheered as Prof Kate did a mock curtsy. “Bet that surprised you” she said laughing.

“Okay have some water MILF” Prof Kate said to Rochelle and threw a bucket of water in Rochelle’s face. She then sat on Rochelle’s lap and emptied a bucket of the recycled gunge over their heads. “That wasn’t a big enough serving of Victorian Gruel” she added and snapped her fingers and a load of the recycled gunge cascaded down over them. Both screamed in shock and started laughing.

A chant of “Sophie, Sophie” broke out from the cage and gunge covered Kate Duchess of Cambridge and the topless Princess Beatrice lead an embarrassed swimsuit wearing and gungy Sophie Countess of Wessex over towards Rochelle. “We’ll protect your modesty Sophie” Beatrice reassured her. Sophie went and picked up two buckets and bought them over and said ” Sophie, Countess of Wessex, GCVO, DStJ, CD aged 55 and 2 children”. “What was CD stand for” Rochelle asked. “Champion Dogger” Rosamund shouted. “It’s Chief” actually Sophie responded as everyone roared with laughter. Sophie moved forward towards Rochelle with Kate and Beatrice either side of her and slipped down the straps of her swimsuit in order to show Rochelle her breasts as per Baby Shower rules. As she did this with her back to the cameras. Beatrice nodded to Kate and they pulled the swimsuit right down. Sophie’s shapely bum was on view for all to see. She screamed as Beatrice gave her a bearhug lifting her off the ground and Kate pulled the swimsuit off her flailing feet. “You pair of ******* Royal ****” Sophie raged. “I can only see one Royal **** and it’s yours Aunty Sophie” Beatrice replied laughing.

Sophie stood there trying to hide her modesty. “You’ve got to throw the buckets Sophie or we’ll but you back on the Torture Wheel” Kate threatened. “Okay” said Sophie laughing and bent down to pick up a bucket letting her boobs swing free. “Bit more saggy than I thought” Rochelle joked. “*** off you cow, they are good for my age” Sophie replied laughing and threw a bucket of water over Rochelle’s head. “Give us a hug Sophie?” Rochelle asked holding her arms out. Sophie walked over to her but Rochelle grabbed hold of her and spun her around so everyone could see a neatly trimmed muff and good boobs for her age. Laughing Kate threw a bucket of oxtail soup over them.

Sophie rather meekly hugged Rochelle again and still trying to cover her modesty joined Chris, Kate and Beatrice. Suddenly Sophie dived for Beatrice’s bikini bottoms and pulled them down over her impressive thighs to reveal a clean shaven muff. Beatrice screamed and rolled around the floor with Sophie. “I’ve got a great view from here” Rochelle shouted. Kate was laughing hugely at them but they suddenly grabbed hold of her and pulled her to the floor. Sophie and Beatrice pulled Kate’s top off right over her head. Having lost her bra in a magic trick much earlier in the night. The future Queen of England was now topless for all to see. Kate screamed with embarrassment as Sophie and Beatrice helped her up keeping hold of her. “Wow you really are flat chested” Thandie shouted over joking. “They are ******* pleasantly petite” Kate screamed defiantly.

Suddenly the three naked Royals were hit by a spray of gunge as Rosamund had turned the hose used for the Tiswas Torture Wheel onto the threesome. She covered them completely with the grey slurry and gave Rochelle a blast too as the crowd cheered. “Well I’ve heard of Royal Flushes not Royal Flashes. Let’s thank our 3 amazing royals and Rochelle Humes” Chris said as the audience cheered.

“Now can we welcome back Sheena Easton, Gwen Stefani and Pixie Lott” Chris said. The bikini brief wearing and topless Sheena and Gwen and the swimsuit wearing Pixie all walked over from the Cage to warm applause. All three ladies were very messy. “What song will you be performing for us ladies?” Chris asked. “Champagne from Tommy” Sheena announced. “I don’t know that song but if I’ve got the lyrics. I’ll be the best” Pixie chipped in. “I love that scene” Gwen added Smiling. “I’ll join in too” said Denise Van Outen running over “And Me” said Katherine Jenkins who was gunge covered in her belly dancing costume.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=awdlhoIc3c8 – Clip of song from Tommy

“If you could take your places in that giant paddling pool” Chris said pointing to it. “That’s strange” Pixie said as the other girls lead her smiling towards it. “The Tiswas OTT All Star Girls” Chris announced and the music started. The song words were written on boards which Lenny Henry and Bob Carolgees held up for the girls to see. Pixie took centre stage but all the other girls were happy to take a line each. The song was progressing nicely and Chris turned on a hose filling the pool up with soap bubbles. “This is fun” Pixie shouted again hogging the limelight. Suddenly Chris turned on a much bigger hose engulfing the girls in baked beans as he completely covered them Pixie screamed but was dragged down by the other girls all laughing. They held Pixie in front of the hose so she was obliterated and then rolled her around in it as she struggled and screamed. In the melee Denise had pulled Katherine’s bra off exposing her juicy Welsh breasts. Katherine dunked Denise’s head repeatedly under the baked beans.

Chris then turned on the final largest hose which engulfed the ladies in mud which had been watered down slightly from Compost Corner. Rachel Burden, Ruxandra Porojnicu, Emily Maitlis and Daisy Ridley all ran over to try and pull Pixie to safety. All were naked apart from Daisy in her swimsuit and all were messy. But the totally naked and also gunge covered Rosamund, Thandie, Katie Thistleton, Lisa Snowdon and Trinny Woodall also ran over and everyone ended up in the pool as Chris filled it with mud. Amber Gill and Maisie Smith tottered over on their heels and predictably got pulled in too. A pair of bikini briefs flew out of the pool as Chris finally ended the onslaught. Sheena came up totally naked covered in mud holding a swimsuit. “I’ve got it” she shouted pulling a screaming and naked mud covered woman up alongside her. Suddenly another mud covered woman emerged holding a swimsuit screaming “We got it off her or someone did” and another screaming and protesting naked woman was pulled from the mud alongside her.

“Pixie where are you?” shouted a desperate Rachel Burden emerging from beneath the mud. The girl stood next to Sheena meekly put her hand up and fell into Rachel’s arms distraught. “Well who have I got?” the other girl holding the swimsuit said. “Who is that?” Chris asked. “It’s me Rosamund” she replied and wiped her eyes. Suddenly a familiar voice emerged from the mud “Oops, What am I like. I thought I’d got Pixie” said Maisie struggling to her feet. “You did better than that. You got Daisy” shouted Rosamund throwing Daisy’s swimsuit away and dropping her back into the mud as she fumed and crawled over to Rachel’s group.

“I can now announce the total is £4.297.567. Join us after the break for the finale” Chris said as Rachel’s group consoled each other whilst the other girls all hugged and laughed.

The Messfits- Pt 7

$
0
0

Friday had soon rolled around. Millie was sat in her sat outside Lacey’s house waiting for her friend to come out. What had they agreed to? In the next hour or so, she knew that both of them would be very messy indeed, having said that it was a nice little earner.

The pair of them had managed to keep it a secret from everyone, they had agreed they didn’t want anyone knowing about this. Millie was adamant that no-one was to find out, especially not Ed.

Lacey got in the car and the pair headed off to the MAD studio.

“What do you think we’ll be doing?” Lacey asked.

“I’ve no idea, let’s hope they ease us in gently”, Millie replied.

When they got to the studio, Shona was there to greet them, she was always very good at making people feel welcome, and made sure they had a drink before they got started.

The three of them were sat there chatting, when there was a knock on the door.

“Come in”, Shona called.

Into the room walked another blonde, that Millie and Lacey didn’t recognise. She smiled and waved, and Shona got up to give her a hug.

“Millie. Lacey. This is Sophia. She’ll be the host of today’s film, the first game in our new series Millie v Lacey”.

Sophia, had short blonde hair, and was in her late 20s. She smiled and waved at the two new recruits, “pleased to meet you both”, she said sincerely, “look forward to working with you”.

Millie and Lacey looked at each other, truth be told, they were both a little nervous but grateful that they would be doing this together.

“Right, I’m going to go and set the studio up”, said Shona, who would be behind the camera today, “I’ll leave you three to get to know each other a little better”.

Shona left the room, leaving Millie, Lacey and Sophia to have a chat.

Sophia took the time to reassure both newbies that it would all be fine, and that she felt nervous on her first shoot too. She reminded them they wouldn’t be on their own, they didn’t have to anything they didn’t want to, and that it was all harmless fun. Sophia also reminded them that MAD was all about being Messed and Dressed, and that many models did this sort of thing with very few clothes on.

A few minutes later, Shona invited Millie and Lacey to go and get changed. For this first head to head battle, they would be wearing white blouses, with opposing colour skirts, red for Millie, and blue for Lacey. Once they were changed, they made their way to the studio. Bothe girls wore their long hair down over their shoulders, though Millie did worry what any gunge might do to her blonde highlights.

Both ladies took a seat on a plastic chair and Shona began to explain how everything would work. As she did this, Millie and Lacey could see Sophia, who had also got changed and was now wearing a short black dress, preparing a number of buckets. They looked at each other, both with a little bit of concern, but at the same time with a strange sense of anticipation.

Eventually, everything was set up and they were ready to start filming. Sophia introduced the shoot and then allowed Millie and Lacey to introduce themselves. Sophia explained their would be three rounds, and that the loser of each round would be gunged, there would then be a larger gunging for the overall loser.

The first game was Two Truths and a Lie, this would be a chance for viewers to get to know Millie and Lacey a little better. They would both come up with three facts about themselves and if Sophia guessed correctly what the lie was they would score a point. Sophia tossed a coin and Lacey would go first, she started to think.

“Erm, ok, let me just think about this, right ok, I think I have three”.

“Ok. Take it away”, invited Sophia.

“Right, number one, I have starred in two versions of Bugsy Malone. Number two, I was egged and floured on my 18th birthday. Number three, i have pied somebody in the face”.

“Ooh, ok, all messy facts. I like it. Well I’m pretty certain that number 3 is true, and I think you’re a singer aren’t you, so I’d guess one is true, so I’ll say that number two is the lie”.

“Correct!”, smiled Lacey.

Millie now knew that to stand a chance in this game, Sophia had to get hers right too. She also felt under pressure to make the stories about mess, but couldn’t think of two truths.

“Ok, Millie, your turn”.

“Right, ok, number one is that I once fell face first in a puddle of mud, number two is that I once had a bucket of water thrown at me on stage, and number three is that a waitress once accidentally dropped a dessert on my head”.

“Ooh, this is a little trickier”, said Sophia, “I think that two is true, and I know you’re a singer too. I like the idea that three is true, so I’ll say number one is the lie?”

Millie frowned, “oh no”, she said, “number three was the lie”.

“Oh no indeed”, laughed Sophia, “that means you have lost this round Millie, and you know what that means in this game”.

Sophia picked up a large bucket and walked round behind Millie. Lacey watched on in part awe, and part borror, as Sophia took great delight in emptying a vast quantity of thick pink gunge straight over Millie’s head. She squealed as the cold, thick gunge rained down on her, instantly covering her from head to toe. She thought to herself, if this was the smaller gunging, what would the large loser’s gunging be like.

Dripping in gunge, and not looking best pleased about it, Millie now had to get herself ready for the second game. This would be a really simple best of five game of Rock Paper Scissors. Sophia explained that the winner of each individual game would get to pie the loser, and the overall loser would then get the bucket of gunge.

The game played out, with Millie winning the first two heats, and taking great pleasure in getting Lacey a little messy, splatting two yellow and white cream and custard pies in her face. Lacey won the next two and was able to get her own back on Millie, it all came down to this.

“3…2….1….”, Sophia counted down.

Lacey went for scissors, but Millie had gone with rock and took the win.

Lacey put her head in her hands, she knew what was to come, but had forgotten one thing, and as soon as she looked up….SPLAT! The final winning pie from Millie hit her square in the face. Meanwhile, Sophia had prepared herself and was in position with a bucket of thick blue gunge, which she once again took great delight in emptying over Lacey’s head. Both girls were now completely covered, they looked at each other and both started laughing.

“Right”, said Sophia, “it’s time for the final game, and this is a great one”. She winked at the camera.

“All you have to do is call someone in your phone, don’t tell them where you are, or what you are doing, but you have to get them to say the word GUNGE! The person whose contact does it in the fastest time wins!”

Millie and Lacey looked at each other in horror. How on earth were they going to manage that?

“Right Millie, as you won the last game, you have the choice of whether to go first or second, oh, and you can’t both ring the same person, and don’t forget, the loser faces purr Big Gunging!”

Millie sat there frozen. She didn’t know what to do, or who to ring. She was handed a towel to wipe her hands and was then handed her mobile phone. She opened it up and scrolled through the contacts.

“Ok Millie, who you gonna ring?” Sophia asked.

“Erm, I’ll have to ring my friend Zoe”, she said tentatively.

“Ok then, let’s ring Zoe, remember all you have to do is get her to say the word gunge, I’ll start the stopwatch when she answers the phone. Good luck!”

The phone started to ring and was put on speaker.

Zoe answered, “Hi Millie, everything OK?”

“Yeh, fine thanks, just a quick one, what’s the word for that thick gooey stuff they used on telly in the 90s?”

“Oh, erm, gunge? I think, why?”

“Ah yes, that’s it, listen, I’ve got to go I’ll explain later!”

Millie hung up and Sophia showed her the stopwatch. “Very impressive”, she said, “9.2 seconds. Right, Lacey, you know that’s the time you need to beat in order to avoid our Mega Messing, Gigantic Gunging, or whatever you want to call it. Who you gonna ring?”

“My friend Ed”, she said with a smile.

Shona, from behind the camera, suddenly looked very concerned, and took out her own mobile phone. She raised her left hand to pause the recording.

“Everything OK Shona?” asked Sophia.

“Yeah, just give me two seconds”, she said, frantically tapping away on her phone.

She had of course sent a message to Frank, and while she sat to wait for a reply, the others began to wonder what was going on, not least Millie and Lacey, who were now both starting to feel the cold of the gunge.

“Can we carry on?” asked Sophia impatiently.

“Fine”, Shona said, trying to hide her reluctance, she too could see the effect the long delay was having on the two debutant models. The film began to roll again, and Lacey began to call Ed. As soon as he answered, Sophia started her stopwatch.

“Hey Lacey, everything alright?”

“Yeh, I just need your help, dead quick”.

“Oh, ok, no problem, what can I do?”

“What’s the name of the stuff , oh, erm, Americans call it slime I think? I can’t think of the word?”

“I’ve no idea what you’re on about Lace, sorry, what do you mean, slime?”

“Oh, come on Ed, you know, that stuff they use on kids TV, does it begin with G?”

“Oh, I know what you mean, you mean gunge, I used to love shows like that when I was little. Why?”

“No time to explain, something to do with uni, I’ll catch up with you later”.

The call ended, Sophia had already stopped the clock at the mention of the word gunge, but it was fairly obvious to all four girls in the studio what the outcome was. Lacey looked petrified.

“Well Lacey, as you know, the time to beat was 9.2 seconds, I can tell you, that the time it took Ed to say the word gunge was 13.8 seconds”. Lacey put her head in her hands, while Millie put her arms in the air and began cheering.

“So Lacey, you will be facing our Mega Mess! Millie, you go one-nil up in the series, how does tha feel?”

“That feels great! I can’t wait to see what happens to Lacey!”

“And how do you feel Lacey?”

“Not great obviously, I’m going to kill Ed when I see him!”

Shona was still looking slightly distracted behind the camera, she had still heard nothing from Frank. She knew what was about to happen to Lacey, and that Ed was partly responsible for it.

Meanwhile, Sophia was preparing more buckets, there were 10 in total, eight were filled with black gunge and two bright yellow.

“Are you ready Lacey?”

Lacey nodded gingerly.

Sophia picked up the first bucket, walked behind Lacey and poured it straight over the brunette’s head. She immediately walked back round in front of Lacey, before picking up another bucket of black gunge and throwing it in Lacey’s face.

Lacey was already covered, but Sophia invited Millie to repeat this process. Millie took great delight in emptying another load of thick black goo straight over Lacey, whose white blouse was now completely destroyed. She then took a fourth bucket and threw it at her friend, laughing as she did it.

Next, both Millie and Sophia took a bucket each, this time Sophia chose one of the yellow buckets. The two buckets were poured simultaneously over Lacey. She was completely covered now. This really was the mother of all gungings.

There were still four buckets left, and the final three buckets of black gunge were emptied onto the 20 year old’s head. Millie then took the final bucket of yellow gunge and threw half the contents straight into Lacey’s face, then finally poured the last bit over her head.

“And how did that feel Lacey?” Sophia asked cheekily.

“Gross! I definitely wanna make sure I win the next game”, Lacey said.

The filming was brought to a close and the girls were helped out of the studio, in order to get a shower. Millie and Lacey had a chat as they made their way to get cleaned up, and agreed it wouldn’t be so bad to do a couple more of these. They also agreed not to tell Ed the real reason why they wanted him to say the word gunge.

Once she was showered and dressed in her own clothes again, Millie made her way back to the office. As she opened the door, she could see that Shona was on the phone, so shut the door again and decided to wait outside, for Lacey, who was still trying to get clean. Just as she did, she overheard Shona shouting, presumably still down the phone, “how the hell was I supposed to know she was gonna ring Ed, or that our new model was gonna be your nephew’s potential future girlfriend”.

Millie couldn’t quite believe what she was hearing, she stayed outside the office door, waiting quietly, listening to see what else she could find out.

Tiswas/OTT Charity Revival Part 15 – The Finale Part 2 – The End to the Insanity

$
0
0

Although this story mentions real persons, corporations, TV shows and places, it is purely a work of fiction for personal enjoyment. The story does NOT describe real events and should NOT be taken to accurately portray any real entity mentioned. In keeping with its fictional nature, the events and activities described in the story may not be legal, ethical or safe. This site does NOT endorse or recommend their enactment.This story will contain scenes of nudity and/or a sexual nature. 

All women are messy and presumed naked unless indicated otherwise.

“Well we have just about made it welcome back to the final 385 yards of the Tiswas/OTT Charity revival. We have seen Royals, A-Listers, Singers, Actresses, Dancers, Tennis Players, Professors and former MPs all get messy in the fun quest to raise money for our charities” Chris Tarrant said. “Soon we will have the Greatest Show on Legs (Wheels Cha Cha played in the background) but first we have the pie challenge. Representing 3 generations Sheena Easton, Rosamund Pike and Maisie Smith” Chris added.

All three ladies still covered in mud after the chaos of the performance of Champagne from Tommy the Musical walked on to huge cheers. “The task is simple, who can take the most custard pies in one minute. Each lady can choose 3 other ladies to pie them. Who are you choosing Sheena?” Chris asked. “I’ll go for fellow Scots Martell Maxwell, Jo Swinson and fellow singer Gwen Stefani” Sheena said. Martell, Jo and the topless Gwen walked on laughing and stood behind Sheena. “I’ll have Thandie Newton, Katie Thistleton and Charlie Dimmock” Rosamund said. “Interesting choice in Charlie?” Chris asked as the three ladies walked on and stood behind Rosamund. “Yes, she’s a big strong lass and those boobs will flap about madly” Rosamund replied laughing. “We’ll let me think” said Maisie. “It is 1:00 am you know” Chris responded joking. “I’ll have Amber Gill who has been with me since the start of the show and I think being flat chested may be useful so I’ll have Trinny Woodall and Kate Duchess of Cambridge” she added. Amber and Trinny walked over smiling and slowly the topless and jean wearing Kate walked over still trying to cover her boobs and they all stood behind Kate.

“Why did you choose me?” Kate hissed rather embarrassed in Maisie’s ear. “Because I love you and so we can all see those pleasantly petite breasts” Maisie replied laughing. “Okay I admit I’m flat chested” Kate said out loud as the audience cheered. “To count the pies put on each lady please welcome back Lenny Henry, Bob Carolgees and Den Hegarty” Chris said. The three former Tiswas legends walked back on. “Bob will count for Sheena, Den for Rosamund and Lenny for Maisie. Plus the man, the legend, the mystery who will have the final say the Phantom Flan Flinger” Chris announced.

The four men walked on and the Phantom gave a pie in the face to each of Sheena, Rosamund and Maisie. Chris pointed to 3 chairs set up about 3 metres apart and a long table containing hundreds of custard pies behind it. Each chair had a large custard pie placed on it. “Please take your place on the first seat Sheena” Chris said. Sheena walked over laughing to her seat and sat down splat on the pie sending it everywhere. “Can Martell, Jo and Gwen take there places behind Sheena” Chris instructed. “Bob and Phantom please observe from each side and when minute is up confer and announce the final count” he added. “We are doing this separately then?” Sheena shouted. “Yes there would be too much chaos otherwise and their could be sabotage” Chris responded.

“Right on my whistle go” Chris announced blowing a whistle. Jo, Martell and Gwen began to rain down pies on the screaming Sheena. “Two at a time” she screamed. Jo’s pendulous bosom bounced manically from side to side. Martell fell over bringing Gwen down with her and they started throwing pies at each other. “On ****** me” Sheena yelled and took a mouthful of pie cream. “30 seconds gone” Chris announced. Jo took an armful of about 10 pies and gave Sheena a mega double armed pie sandwich. Gwen and Martell remained doing the double pieing to the back of Sheena who was disappearing beneath a mountain of shaving foam. “10 seconds remaining” Chris announced as Jo got another mega 8 pie sandwich onto Sheena. They then started throwing pies at the back of Sheena from the table and Jo delivered one more mega 6 pie pieing as Chris blew his whistle. Jo, Gwen and Martell hugged whilst Sheena wiped her eyes and got her breath back.

Bob and the Phantom conferred. “What number did you get?” Chris asked “I got 119 but Phantom got 123. As he has the final say. Would you say this number is fair?” Bob said whispering to the Phantom who nodded. “We have agreed on 122” Bob announced as the audience cheered and Sheena waved her hands in delight.

“Okay Rosamund please take your seat” Chris announced. “I’m puckering up my lips” Rosamund replied massaging her gunge covered vagina. She walked over to her seat opened her legs and slid down onto the large custard pie. “Can Thandie, Katie and Charlie take their places behind Rosamund please and can Den and the Phantom stand each side” Chris said. “If we were in front we’d disappear up that matted bucket” Thandie replied. “Right on my whistle go” Chris announced blowing a whistle. Katie and Thandie started a relay system of Katie passing two pies to Thandie who then pied Rosamund. Charlie went for the armful technique Jo had used and got 6 pies on Rosamund. “****** cover me” Rosamund screamed as a stream of pies engulfed her. Charlie went for a mega armful of 12 put fell over and the pies went on her face and tits as the audience roared with laughter. “Hurry up you *****” Rosamund screeched as Chris announced “30 seconds gone”. Charlie joined Thandie in being handed pies by Katie and this seemed to work as Rosamund was engulfed by the barrage of pies. “10 seconds left” Chris shouted. All three girls grabbed 8 pies each and hit Rosamund from all angles with them as Chris blew his whistle.

Den and the Phantom conferred and the Phantom gave a thumbs up. “We both got 130” Den announced as Rosamund punched the air from beneath all the custard pies and the other ladies hugged her.

“Okay Maisie please take your seat” Chris said Maisie tottered over still in her high heels sat on the custard pie and slid into a splits sideways on the chair in a sexy manner. She bought her legs together and faced the audience as they cheered. Can Amber and the two flat chested ladies take their places behind Maisie please and can Lenny and the Phantom stand each side” Chris said. “Pleasantly petite” Kate replied laughing. “You are ****** as flat chested as me Cambridge” Trinny added as her and Kate burst out laughing. “Okaaaay” Lenny shouted to huge cheers.

Amber, Kate and Trinny conferred and fist bumped. “Right on my whistle go” Chris announced blowing a whistle. Amber, Kate and Trinny started doing 4 pies at a time each not going too fast to avoid and slipping or dropping pies as they delivered a steady stream of pies on Maisie who screamed “Keep going”. Maisie disappeared beneath a barrage of pies as Chris announced “30 seconds gone”. Amber was going as quick as she could and did drop a couple of pies but Kate and Trinny moved serenely and swiftly not dropping a single pie. “10 seconds left” Chris shouted. The audience started chanting “Maisie, Maisie” as the last dozen or so pies blitzed her as Chris blew his whistle.

Lenny and the Phantom whispered to each other. Lenny smiled and the Phantom hit Maisie with a pie in the face. “An incredible 142” Lenny shouted. Maisie grabbed hold of Kate in delight put typically slipped and rolled around on the floor with Kate who was in hysterics. Amber and Trinny helped them up and they all hugged and held their arms aloft in delight. Kate wasn’t bothered her breasts were on display as they all took a bow.

The other two teams embraced the winners. “You deserve it” Rosamund said to Maisie hugging her. “You are such a star” Sheena told her. Chris congratulated Maisie. “Well you’ve proved you can take the most pies” he said as all the other girls rained the remaining few pies on Maisie. “Well the plan worked perfectly, Trinny and Kate worked out if we could get two lots of 4 pies by each girl on me every 10 seconds. We’d get —- a lot of pies” Maisie said unable to do the maths. “144” Kate said. “Yes and Kate promised to flash her bum if we won” Maisie teased. Kate started to giggle and shook her head in disbelief.

“Okay please thank these amazing ladies and join us after the break for the Greatest Show on Legs” Chris announced.

The girls all returned to the Cage and started mocking Rachel Burden, Ruxandra Porojnicu, Emily Maitlis, Pixie and Daisy Ridley. “We will not do the Greatest Show” Rachel snapped. “Okay you can all face my little surprise” Rosamund replied.

Chris welcomed everyone back and announced “The total is now £4,476,927. Now it’s time for the Greatest Show on Legs” Wheels Cha Cha started playing and Maisie and Amber danced on holding a couple of balloons trying to hide their modesty. They were soon joined by Rosamund, Thandie and Katie. Rosamund and Thandie were typically pushing their long thin inflated balloons between their legs. They all moved to the side and started clapping as all the Saturdays including the pregnant Rochelle came on with their balloons. They were swiftly followed by Martell, Denise Van Outen, Nadia Sawalha, Jaime Murray and Professor Kate Williams. Jaime and Martell kept wobbling Nadiya’s belly. Denise slid into the splits and was joined by Maisie. Then Charlie, Trinny and Lisa Snowdon danced on. Charlie and Lisa comically kept Trinny’s much smaller boobs covered with their balloons until Trinny bust them.

Elisabeth Dermot Walsh, Laura Rollins, Jennifer Metcalfe and Sheena then danced on finally followed by Jo Swinson, Talulah Riley, Sophie Countess of Wessex and Princess Beatrice. The two Royals grabbed each others balloons as all the girls took a bow, turned around and wiggled their bums.

“Now for version two where anyone who hasn’t stripped gets the opportunity to” Chris announced. The music started again and the topless Dianne Buswell danced on, she threw off her knickers to reveal a bright red dyed muff to match her hair. She slid into the splits and rolled over with her legs in the air as she got up giving everyone a great view. Fiona Bruce also topless walked on laughing and sultrily took her knickers off as Dianne prodded her with her balloon as Fiona stood there with a clean shaven muff Kym Marsh then sashayed on and dropped her cycle shorts to show a thin dark line on her muff. An exuberant Gwen Stefani ran on as Dianne and Kym pulled her bikini strings. Gwen covered her modesty with her balloons before throwing her arms in the air to show a dyed blonde muff as that set of girls took their bows.

Cathy Newman then walked on and dropped her basque and stood there in just a pair of frilly knickers. She held her balloons over her boobs as Kym and Dianne ran forward and pulled her knickers down. Cathy bent over and gave everyone a great view moving one of her balloons rudely between her legs before turning around to reveal a blonde and curly haired muff. “Katherine, Katherine” the girls started chanting as finally Katherine Jenkins in her belly dancer’s skirt walked on rather shyly. The other girls held balloons in front of her as Katherine dropped her skirt and turned with her back to the audience. The girls removed their balloons as Katherine stood their wiggling her shapely bum. She then turned around and belted out an soprano “Cha, Cha, Cha” as all the other girls burst their balloons and she displayed a clean shaven muff.

The crowd cheered as all the girls joined together and did a huge joint dance. Suddenly Rachel Burden’s voice came out over the audience. She had grabbed a mic from a floor manager. “Rosamund, Thandie and Katie. You have lost two parts of the bet are missing. I wanted two Songs of Praise Presenters nude and 3 Royal Bum Flashes” she screamed. Rosamund ran over to Kate Duchess of Cambridge and spoke to her. Kate turned around undid her jeans and flashed her bum at Rachel screaming “Kiss my ****** Royal Arse” as the audience cheered. Claire McCollum in a sports bra and tracksuit bottoms ran on and nodded to the girls Katie grabbed her sports bra and Thandie pulled her tracksuit bottoms and knickers down. Claire jumped forward totally naked laughing displaying a pert pair of breasts and a neatly trimmed bush. “Take that you bleeding cow” she screamed at Rachel as the other girls lifted her up and hugged her.

The music played one more time as all the girls who were naked and those who hadn’t stripped fully all danced together as Chris, Lenny, Bob, Den and Prince William all hosed them down with the recycled gunge and the Phantom threw the last few remaining custard pies at the girls. Kate mooned the audience again but Sophie, Beatrice and Trinny pulled her skinny jeans off. She hid at the back but as the girls took their final bows. Maisie pulled her to the front and dropped a splits in front of her pointing at her neatly trimmed brown muff. Kate has highly embarrassed but Beatrice and Sophie hugged her and she slid behind some other girls as the music finally ended and all the gunge ran out.

“Well that is it” said Chris “Thank you to everyone who has taken part. I’m delighted to announce our final total is £4,863,764. It’s been rude, it’s been crazy but this has been Tiswas/OTT Charity Revival” he added.

“Not so fast” Rosamund said as she, Thandie, Martell, Jo and Charlie surrounded Pixie, Emily, Ruxandra and Daisy. Whilst Lisa and Trinny dragged Rachel over to them. “We won the bet plus you didn’t take part in the Greatest Show on Legs. So you all face my final treat” Rosamund shouted. They placed the 5 ladies on a large X spot on the floor and all stood next to them. Amber handed Prince William a card. Suddenly Maisie tottered over on her heels pulling Kate over to the area. Poor Kate was clearly naked for all to see. “It’s a Royal Opening we cannot miss this” she enthused. William looked at his naked wife and said “It certainly is” as Kate gave him an evil glance. “It’s okay Maisie” Rosamund said not really wanting Kate there. “No Kate should be in the middle” Maisie protested and pushed her between Rachel and Daisy.

“I hope this isn’t gross” Chris shouted. “Of course not” Rosamund said. William looked at the card and said “I declare Rosamund’s Elephant Curry House open” and a load of yellow coloured liquid and brown matter hit Pixie, Emily, Rachel, Ruxandra and Daisy mainly. Kate perhaps copped for the most and Thandie, Rosamund, Katie and Maisie were also well covered. The other girls had ducked out of the way on hearing what William said. Pixie, Emily, Rachel, Ruxandra and Daisy were all screaming and Kate was stood there in shock as a pungent smell wafted across the studio. Pixie, Emily, Rachel, Ruxandra and Daisy started coughing and retching as they realised what they had likely been hit with.

“Rosamund that was too far” Chris shouted. “Patsy Palmer cow pat on head. Ray Stubbs into a ball of shit. I got some elephants fed curry that is all” Rosamund replied. William had burst out laughing as Kate slowly walked forward and he took a step back when he began to smell her, Kate now dripping brown matter looked at Maisie who said “Ops, sorry Kate. What Am I Like” and slid into her splits as the show ended with the view of the destroyed Kate.

And that’s all folks

Holly’s House Party: Season 1 Episode 4

$
0
0

Although this story mentions real persons, corporations, TV shows and places, it is purely a work of fiction for personal enjoyment. The story does NOT describe real events and should NOT be taken to accurately portray any real entity mentioned. In keeping with its fictional nature, the events and activities described in the story may not be legal, ethical or safe. This site does NOT endorse or recommend their enactment.

The music of Noel’s House Party blared as the show went on air. The audience clapped as Holly Willoughby welcomed the audience.

4f7c27c8aa9e409fd82a59b6cbeda53e (1)

“Hello, ladies and gentlemen! Welcome to the House Party, we have quite the show planned for this evening! First of all, tonight, it is the return of the ‘Battle of the Soaps.’ We got a couple of international soap opera vets. Lets get to it!” Holly jogged over to where the carwash device spun out from the wall. Above it sat a tank filled to the brim with thick blue gunge. In front of it sat Indiana Evans

Indiana-Evans

And Rhiannon Fish.

Hall+Pass+Sydney+Premiere+M_IMJTLFTGjx

Holly continued “Ladies how are you feeling?” Both girls responded almost in unison “Nervous!” which caused laughter from the audience. Holly continued “Well tonight girls, as you know, one of you will be getting covered in some thick, sloppy gunge. It is up to the audience to decide who gets it. Ladies, you better convince the audience as to why it shouldnt be you.” Holly turned her attention and spoke to Indiana. “Now alot of people think your old character, Matilda, was a bit of a drama queen, and that she was desperate for love.” Indiana feigned shock “How can you say that? She was strong, she overcome obstacles, yeah she could be dramatic, but its over things that warrant drama!”

The crowd laughed while Holly turned and spoke to Rhiannon “Now Rhiannon, your old character, April Scott, was described as kind, outgoing, and friendly.” Rhiannon blushed at the compliments. “But that could also be construed as being nosy and inserting oneself where they dont belong.” Rhiannon now acted shocked and offended “Who would say that? I cant believe it! Look, theres no other way to look at it, she wasn’t dramatic or emotional, she was just a good person!” The crowd laughed and cheered. “Well there you have it, who should be gunged, is it Indiana or is it Rhiannon? Vote all you want, cause by the end of tonight, one of these beauties is gonna end up soaked and slathered in gunge!”

Totty Episode One Guests Dani Dyer, Liz Hurley and the X-Factor Girls Part 1.

$
0
0

Although this story mentions real persons, corporations, TV shows and places, it is purely a work of fiction for personal enjoyment. The story does NOT describe real events and should NOT be taken to accurately portray any real entity mentioned. In keeping with its fictional nature, the events and activities described in the story may not be legal, ethical or safe. This site does NOT endorse or recommend their enactment.This story will contain scenes of nudity and/or a sexual nature. 

The audience cheered as Amber Gill, Maisie Smith and Katie Thistleton walked onto the studio stage as the classic Tiswas theme played. Amber was in a blue bikini, Maisie is grey lycra crop top and shorts whilst Katie was braless in low cut blue dress.

“First there was Tiswas then there was OTT and now there is Totty. We are the Totty Hoties and we’ll be here every Friday night at 11pm for an hour of naughty fun, games and mess” said Katie. “Yes, we are delighted to be hosting this new show in collaboration with Executive Producers Chris Tarrant, Thandie Newton and Rosamund Pike” Amber added. “Yes Thandie and Rosamund will be linking up with us from Hollywood where they will be getting down in the hot tub with Elizabeth Hurley” Maisie said.

“You read that sentence right” Katie teased Maisie. “I’m not as stupid as I sound, but how could I be” Maisie replied laughing. “Joining us on this opening show are three former X Factor contestants Ella Henderson, Lauren Platt and Cher Lloyd. Plus our special guest is my predecessor as Love Island winner Dani Dyer” Amber said. “Perf with Surf” Maisie said and got a bucket of blue gunge over her head from Katie. It ran down her ponytail, over her eyes and onto her ample bosom. “We’ve started early. I guess I’ll get the most mess. But what am I like” said Maisie sliding into her signature splits as the audience cheered.

“Yes after the Tiswas/OTT Charity Revival I took an hour in the shower to get all the crap off me” Amber said laughing as a few highlights from the show were screened. “I only took 40 minutes and to think I started the night being a reluctant participant” Katie replied. “Yes it was crap and goodness knows what else that Rosamund had dumped on us all at the end” Maisie said laughing. “Has Katherine Duchess of Cambridge forgiven you get Maisie?” asked Amber. “For which bit?” Maisie asked. “Getting the shit dumped on her head at the end perhaps?” Katie suggested. “Oh I thought you meant when I used up all the hot water and she had to shower in cold water before William would allow her to get in the car” Maisie said. “How long did you take to get cleaned up then?” Amber asked her. “I took 75 minutes in the shower to get all that gunk off me. 10 lots of shampoo, 20 lots of shower gel and I still smelt of something not very pleasant” Maisie replied. “Custard pies?” asked Amber. “If you like” said Maisie and stuck a pie in Amber’s face. Katie was laughing and got a double pie in the face from Amber and Maisie.

Wiping her eyes clear and laughing Katie said “Please welcome former X Factor contestants Ella Henderson, Lauren Platt and Cher Lloyd”. The three ladies walked on to a nice round of applause. Ella was in a matching black top and skirt. Lauren in a summer top and very short denim skirt both her and Ella were braless. Cher had a cropped tracksuit top and sweatpants on.

“Welcome ladies” Katie said. “I hear that the three of you have recorded our theme song which is a surprise?” Amber asked. “Yes we have called ourselves the Hot Totties” Ella replied laughing. “We’ll be performing it later in an exclusive performance” Lauren added. “I expect we’ll end up rather messy at the end of it” Ella said smiling. “Are you okay Cher?” Katie asked. Cher said nothing. “She scares me like hairy ears on older men” Maisie said randomly. “I know who else scares people. Please read what it says on the autocue Hot Totties” Amber asked. Ella and Lauren screamed “The Phantom Flan Flinger” bursting out laughing guessing what would happen. The Phantom ran on and double pied Ella in the face and then grabbed two more pies and did the same to Lauren. Both girls screamed and giggled as they wiped their eyes clear. The Phantom then returned with another two pies walked up to Cher. She said “Don’t you dare” the Phantom screamed and ran off as the audience roared with laughter.

“Have you anything to say Cher?” Katie asked. “Yes I find this Hot Totty concept unacceptable. I’m a mother now and I don’t like to be the target of objectification” Cher snapped as the audience booed. “Next I’ll be expected to do something like this” she said laughing as she unzipped her tracksuit top and the below t-shirt fell down.

The audience cheered and Cher burst out laughing. “Is that you on the t-shirt?” Maisie asked. “No after having my daughter mine aren’t that firm” Cher replied laughing. “You are right” replied Maisie standing behind Cher and putting her hands on Cher’s boobs. Cher screamed but started to laugh again. “Can I do that back to you?” Cher asked. “Sure” said Maisie lifting her top up to expose her impressive boobs to loads of wolf whistles. “Come on Amber do the same” Maisie encouraged her. Amber smiling lifted her bikini top to expose her even bigger boobs. “Grab hold of them Katie” Maisie instructed. Ella rand behind Lauren and grabbed her boobs too and Cher took hold of Maisie’s to huge cheers.

“You are mad” said Lauren laughing at Maisie and Amber as they put their boobs away. “We’ll probably be seeing yours later as no-one is wearing a bra I hope” Katie added laughing. “Of course not” said Cher pulling her t-shirt tight to show her nipples. “I thought you were going to be a right cow when you first came on” Amber said to Cher. “Always expect the unexpected” Cher replied smiling. “You were a cow on the X-Factor though?” Katie said joking. “Yes I was a 16 year old brat and really became hated. It made me mature and grow up. So here I am going to be humiliated on Totty” Cher replied as the audience clapped. “Cows produce a lot of products like cream” Maisie said as the Phantom sneaked on and emptied a bucket of cold cream over Cher’s head.

She screamed with the shock and the coldness as the white liquid ran down her long dark hair and she stood there seething gritting her teeth. She slowly turned around to the Phantom and growled at him and he screamed and ran off again. Cher laughed at this and said “I guess that will be a running joke. Well we are all messy now” as the crowd cheered seeing she was up for some fun and a good sport. “We were worried how you’d react Cher?” Amber asked. “That was a bloody shock. But if I didn’t know what was likely to happen to me. I wouldn’t have come on” Cher replied. “Cows do big pats too” Katie joked. “Don’t you ****** dare” Cher replied trying not to laugh. “No we only do that to Royals mainly” Amber added.

“We are going to play a fun game where one of you will get messy so please come this way” said Katie. She walked across the studio floor but a spray of gunge shot up her skirt as she walked over one grill. “Got me right in the eye” she said laughing. Amber and Maisie walked over it and nothing happened. Lauren walked over it and a sharp spray of gunge went up her short skirt from another grill. “Right between my legs” she screamed. “You’d know about that” Cher replied laughing as she walked across the floor and nothing happened. “I’m not walking there” Ella said. “Don’t be stupid” said Katie walking back to Ella and then back across the floor with nothing happening.

Ella walked forward and the first spray went right up her skirt. She jumped in the air and landed up the second grill and got another much bigger spray up her skirt which made her jump and scream even louder. “Marilyn Monroe, never had that problem” Ella said laughing.

“Okay please meet Trudie. She has a link to one of you ladies but you don’t know why. The lady who does have the link will end up standing on the Totty Hot Spot below our Chute to the Pies and you can guess what will happen” said Katie as Trudie walked on.

“We’ll show you how this will work” said Maisie pointing to 3 initial stars on the floor. “If the answer to the question is yes you move forward onto the next star” she added. There were 4 lots of 3 stars on the floor and then a big Red Star at the end. It was under a builder’s chute attached to a raised platform. “So let’s start with Maisie on the first star. If she answers yes she moves forward” Amber said. “So are you a woman?” she added laughing. Maisie nodded laughing and moved onto the next star. “Are you in East Enders?” Amber asked and Maisie nodded and moved forward. “Are you red haired?” Amber went on. Maisie nodded and moved onto the 4th star. “Do you want to find out what happens if you stand on the Totty Hot Spot?” Amber asked. “I guess so” Maisie replied laughing knowing what was likely to happen she stepped onto the Hot Spot.

“This” said Katie stood on the raised platform and emptied a bucket down the builder’s chute. Maisie was hit by a barrage of baked beans. She stood there with beans dripping off her hair and running down into her lycra top. “Or This” Katie added laughing and emptied a bucket of oxtail soup down the chute which obliterated Maisie’s hair. “Or finally this” Katie said emptying a bucket of ice cold yogurt down the chute. Maisie stood there totally destroyed and the audience went ahh. “There are other ways you can take the mess” Amber said. “Okay let’s swap places” Maisie said to her wiping her eyes as the audience cheered.

Laughing Amber and Maisie swapped places. “You could take it over your boobs” Maisie said. Katie emptied a bucket of Semolina down the chute and it went into Amber’s face and over her boobs. “Or down the front of your trousers, skirt, bikini briefs” Maisie continued laughing. Amber pulled the front of her bikini briefs open and Katie emptied a bucket of custard down the chute. It went on Amber’s stomach and down her briefs.
“This chute reminds me of your fanny” Amber shouted up the chute and got a bucket of mushy peas on her head.

“There is one final way to take the mess. Thistleton get down here and demonstrate it” Maisie ordered her. Katie walked down the staircase and Maisie swapped places with her. “You can take it on your bum but you have to lift your skirt up or pull down your trousers” Amber said. Unable to stop laughing Katie lifted her dress up to display her juicy bum resplendent in a sexy blue thong. She pointed her bum under the chute and Maisie emptied a bucket of ice cold water down it. Katie screamed as the water hit her bum and dropped her dress back down hopping around comically. “That was bloody cold” she shouted up the chute. Maisie emptied another bucket of ice cold water down it but she jumped out of the way. “You missed” Katie shouted up the chute laughing but got a bucket of porridge right over her head. It ran down her long blonde hair as she stood there wiping the mess out of her eyes.

“So now you can all see how it works would Trudie please take her place on the platform and our three ladies on their first star” said Amber. “Okay first question did you all appear on an X-Factor Live Tour?” Amber asked. All three ladies moved onto the second star. “No-one ever told you that you that you’ve got a fat arse?” Katie said laughing. “Screw you” said Ella staying on her spot as Lauren and Cher moved forward. “Have you been told you’ve got saggy tits?” Maisie asked pushing her own boobs in her messy lycra top up. “I fucking hate you” Cher said unable to stop laughing as she and Lauren both moved onto their 4th star. “You’ve never been called the demon love child of Alice Cooper and Victoria Beckham?” Amber said. “Now I really fucking hate you” Cher said as she stayed put and Lauren stepped forward nervously onto the Totty Hot Spot.

“Lauren did you once leave a CBBC gameshow early to do a PA and thus avoid a gunging?” Maisie asked. “Yes” replied Lauren laughing and holding her head in her hands. “Someone had to take your spot didn’t they?” Amber asked. “Yes” Lauren responded very embarrassed. “A young production assistant called Trudie Stainger-Jones perhaps?” Katie concluded. “I guess so. I’m very sorry Trudie” Lauren pleaded. “What did you get gunged with?” Amber asked. “Some CBBC gunge” said Trudie emptying a bucket of yellow gunge down the chute and over Lauren’s head. “Anything else?” Maisie asked. “More CBBC gunge” said Trudie emptying a bucket of green gunge down the chute onto Lauren’s head. “It’s gone down my tits” Lauren screamed. “You should be okay being flat chested” Amber said joking. “Pleasantly petite actually. Cher’s are saggy and small” Lauren joked as Cher sportingly laughed. “Anything else thrown on you that day?” Maisie asked. “A load of custard pie mix” said Trudie dumping a bucket of it down the chute onto Lauren’s head. Lauren stood there dripping with gunge and pie cream. Her hair plastered to her face. Her top stuck to her body. Her small breasts shining with gunge.

“Finally what would you like to gunge Lauren with?” Maisie asked Trudie. “A bucket of spaghetti” Trudie replied. “How would you like to take it Lauren?” Maisie continued. “On my bum” Lauren replied hardly able to stop laughing. She hoisted up her skirt and stood there in a pair of white knickers. “Let’s make this fun” Cher said and gave Lauren a wedgie exposing her small bum cheeks. Lauren bent over and mock crossed herself. Trudie emptied the bucket of spaghetti down the chute and it went splat onto Lauren’s bum. Lauren screamed as the spaghetti hit her and the camera zoomed in on her butt cheeks with strands of spaghetti falling off it.

“Please thank Trudie and Totty justice has been served” join us after the break when we’ll play fun games with Cher and Ella. Plus give it up too for Lauren” Katie said.

Trudie came down and hugged Lauren not minding getting messy and she had a photo taken with Lauren below the chute before departing.

“Welcome back to Totty. We are now going to play a game called higher or lower with Ella” Amber said. Maisie, Amber and Katie led Ella over to a chair where Lauren and Cher were stood. “You just have to guess whether a cream cake is more or less expensive than the previous one” Maisie said. “There is a but and in your case as you were told you once had a big butt it’s a big but” said Katie. “You’ll get the cakes in the face or you have to sit on them” Amber said. Laughing Ella sat down on the chair. “Okay first cake from Aldi is £2.50” said Maisie sticking it right in Ella’s face. “Not bad for the money” Ella remarked as she wiped the cream off her eyes. “Now stand up please” Katie said to her. “How can I tell through my skirt?” Ella asked. “Hoist it up perhaps?” Amber suggested. “But you’ll see my butt cheeks and my bum is a “BIT” big” Ella replied laughing. “I’ve got a better idea” Maisie chipped it. “Take it off” she added.

The audience cheered and chanted “Off, Off”. “Okay” said Ella rather embarrassed and dropping her skirt to reveal a big juicy pair of wobbly bum cheeks in a small black thong. “We all know the Totty clothing rule. If you take it off” Katie said. “It stays off” the audience chanted back. “You buggers” Ella said laughing. “Okay this cake is from the Co-op” said Amber placing a cake on Ella’s chair. “She needs to warm up her butt cheeks first” Cher said walking forward and smacking them so they wobbled. “They need more exercise touch your toes Ella” Lauren added turning Ella with her back to the audience. “You bastard” Ella muttered laughing as she gamely touched her toes as Lauren and Cher wobbled her bum cheeks and then smacked them really hard. “Fucking ****” Ella shouted.

Ella stood back up and took a few deep breaths did a few comedy stretches and sat down splat on the cake. “Higher” she said laughing. “Yes it is £4.49” said Katie. “Okay how about this from Lidl” Amber said sticking another cake in Ella’s face. “Lower” Ella said. “Yes it was £1.99” Katie replied. “How about this one from Tesco?” said Maisie ushering for Ella to stand up and placed it on her chair. Ella turned around and wobbled her cream covered butt cheeks and sat down splat on the cake again. “Higher” Ella said. “Correct it is £3.29” Maisie responded. “Okay this one from Sainsbury’s” said Katie sticking another cake smash in Ella’s face. “Lower” Ella said. “Sorry it was £4.99” Katie said, “Bloody rip off” Ella joked. “As you were wrong you get a random bucket of stuff over your head. Phantom please do the honours” Maisie said.

The Phantom walked on and emptied a bucket of Tomato soup over Ella’s head. It covered her blonde hair ran over the cream on her face. Onto her chest and formed a pool in her lap. Cher went Boo to the Phantom and he ran off terrified. “Okay finally from Waitrose. If you could stand up please Ella? Amber asked and placed the cake on the chair. Ella sat down full force on it and cake shot over all the other girls. “I’ve got a creamy arsehole now. But it’s higher” said Ella laughing. “Yes, it is £8.49” Amber replied.

“Let’s hear it for Ella Henderson. A great sport with one bootylicious butt. Let’s twerk together” Amber said. As the audience cheered. Amber and Ella did a sexy joint twerk as the other girls clapped and cheered.

“Okay it’s your turn now Cher. We know you share your name with Cher. So why not sing one of her songs for us?” Katie asked. “Share with Cher. I’m confused. But what am I like” said Maisie as Katie gave her a pie in the face. “I think you should do If I Could Turn Back Time or as we have retitled it If Pie Could Turn Back Slime” Amber suggested. “That is a good one. I can guess what will be happening” Cher replied laughing.

“We even have a replica Navy Gun for you to sit on” Maisie said. Cher collapsed with laughter as two wooden packing cases gaffa taped together with a piece of plastic drainpipe stuck to it was carried on by Katie. “Where do it put that?” asked Cher pointing to the drainpipe. “Between your legs. You should be used to that” Katie replied. “I’ll sit on it if you do first” Cher challenged Katie. Laughing Katie tucked her skirt up and slid the drainpipe between her legs. “Come on lets all get on” she shouted. Lauren hitched her skirt up and all the girls cocked their legs over the drainpipe. “Never had one this big” said Maisie. “No wonder it takes 6 of us. Just like Henry VIII with his wives” Katie added. “Divorced, Beheaded, Pied, Divorced, Beheaded Survived” Amber said and the Phantom ran on and double pied her.

Laughing all the girls got off bar Cher who tied her t-shirt up to reveal her tiny waist and taut stomach. The music kicked in and Cher started singing. As soon as she said pie Amber ran on and pied her and when she said slime Katie threw a bucket of green slime in her face. Laughing Cher wiped her face and carried on with the original lyrics. She reached the next pie the Phantom ran on saw her and ran off in terror again. When she sang the next slime Maisie emptied a bucket of blue slime right over her head. The slime ran down Cher’s hair and onto her face. She gamely carried on singing. She reached the next pie and Lauren put a pie smack in her face. On the next slime Ella dumped a bucket of read slime on Cher’s head leaving the bucket on her head.

Cher tried to remove it but slipped and fell to the floor with the drainpipe still between her legs. In hysterics she lay there. Ella ran onto help her but Cher pulled her to the floor and started rubbing the slime onto Ella’s thong clad creamy bum. Eventually they got up together and started doing it as a duet. On the next pie the Phantom ran on a pied Ella. On the next slime Lauren ran on and threw a bucket of slime over both Ella and Cher.

They made Lauren join them as the song came to the bridge. Pie was mentioned 5 times along with slime. Lauren and Cher took 2 pies each and Ella one. Ella and Cher took two buckets of slime each and Lauren one. The girls were totally messed up and started rolling around on the floor, Lauren’s skirt got hoisted up and slime stuck down her knickers. Cher’s tracksuit bottoms were pulled down and as she tried to hold onto them Lauren and Ella spun her around the floor. Eventually Cher let go of them to reveal a tiny black thong covering her skinny and tattooed bum. Lauren gamely dropped her skirt too to stand there in her sodden knickers.

It came to the last but one pie and Cher finally got a pie from the Phantom who again ran off scared of her. On the last but one slime Maisie, Amber and Katie each through a bucket of slime at the girls. On the last pie Cher got hit with 3 pies one each from the presenters and on the last slime she was hit with two buckets of slime one each from Amber and Katie and a bucket of baked beans from Maisie. The last stay was changed to gravy and a load of gravy was cascaded from the ceiling onto all 6 girls. As the audience cheered the ladies stood there taking in the applause.

Cher was totally destroyed but was lapping up the applause. “That is our new theme song by the Hot Totties – Ella Henderson, Lauren Platt and proving she has a real fun side and is now longer a moody cow Cher Lloyd” Katie said. Cher wiped the gunge out of her eyes and rung her hair out as she hugged Ella and Lauren. “Why the baked beans?” she asked Maisie. “What am I like” giggled Maisie and slid into her signature splits.

“The girls will be sticking around for Part 2 when we’ll link up with Liz Hurley as she chats to Rosamund and Thandie. I know that is going to be X-Rated”. Katie said. “Plus I’ll be chatting to and no doubt getting messy with Dani Dyer” Amber added. “Join us for Part 2 after the late news update” Maisie concluded still in the splits.

Grudge-2-Sludge – Royal Lockdown Special: Vote Reveal

$
0
0

Although this story mentions real persons, corporations, TV shows and places, it is purely a work of fiction for personal enjoyment. The story does NOT describe real events and should NOT be taken to accurately portray any real entity mentioned. In keeping with its fictional nature, the events and activities described in the story may not be legal, ethical or safe. This site does NOT endorse or recommend their enactment.

The segments open with a close-up of the stylised crown, piped in dirty-gold metallic gunge onto the surface of the royal-blue sludge. The symbol is broken in places, disturbed by the tectonic drift of the fragments of crust – a literal, stale crust that has formed on the surface. Bubbles of fresher, wetter blue rise up in the cracks – an intermittent release of gas from the great digestive belly of the gloopy mass.

The camera zooms out, bringing the words “By Spoil Appointment” into view, rimmed by the knee-high walls that prevent the sludge from invading the stage, though of course the pool extends much deeper than that into the floor. The duchesses are standing in front of the pool at opposite corners, socially distanced and very much in their own worlds. Meghan is engaged in a stormy phone conversation, while Kate is chatting over the video link to Natalie, whose hair is up in a towel-turban, having hastily showered following her surprise flanning from Stuart. She has ditched her ruined jacket, and is now wearing only her black bra (at least on her top half…), although this also bears smears of yellow.

Kate: …Prince Charles is much better now, thanks for asking. Of course, the most important thing is to shield the Queen and Prince Philip, and every precaution is being taken there.

Natalie: I heard a rumour that Prince Philip died a while back and they replaced him with a stunt double!

Kate: [rolls eyes] Oh damn, the secret’s out. Well it explains his driving, I suppose. [Hushes her voice] But what people don’t know is that the real Prince Philip has been cryogenically frozen in the basement of Windsor Castle, alongside Elvis and Lord Lucan!

Natalie: Really?? Wow!!

Meanwhile, Meghan’s phone-call is heating up. Although the voice on the other end can’t be heard, there’s little doubt whom she’s talking to.

Meghan: Darling, you gotta help me… call the lawyers, tell them to bring an injunction against Grudge-2-Sludge! The sludging must not be allowed to go ahead! … Yes darling, I know I agreed to take part, but Kate is cheating left right and centre, and the game is rigged against me! … [Frowns] You don’t sound very sympathetic, Harry… To listen to your tone it almost sounds like you want to see me dunked in all that yucky goop! … [Stamps foot] Why are you laughing? What’s so funny?! … Just get onto the lawyers or there’ll be trouble!!

Fuming, Meghan ends the call.

Clara: [breezes onto the stage] All well in LA, Meghan?

Meghan: None of your business!

Natalie: Welcome back to Grudge-2-Sludge – a very special royal edition starring Kate, Duchess of Cambridge, and Meghan, Duchess of Sussex!

Clara: Kate is miffed by what she sees as Meghan’s snub to the royal family, but Meghan says she was snubbed first, by Kate!

Natalie: There’s only one way these squabbling sisters-in-law can settle their grudge – by one slinging the other into our vat of souring sludge! Eeeuugh! I tell you Clara, that stuff looks real nasty, even from here!

Clara: If only you could smell it, Nat! Euuufff!! It’s gonna be a crowning gory for one of these ladies, and things don’t look too rosy for Meghan, trailing Kate as she is by 11 points to 19 – oh dear! But there’s still time for things to change in the third round of play, plus of course, the verdict of our online audience!

Natalie: But before that, it’s time to show our appreciation to some people who are far more important than these preening princesses…

Clara: …Far more important than me, Clara Quick…

Natalie: …Far more important than me, Natalie Lloyd…

Clara: …Far more important than the writer of this show…

Natalie: [looks blackly to her side] …and far more important than you, Stuart.

Stuart: For once, darling, I’m in perfect agreement.

Clara: We are, of course, referring to our front-line NHS and care workers, who are fighting to keep people alive, bringing comfort in these desolate times, and risking their own lives against this awful virus. So let’s give them a round of applause!

There follows a minute of clapping. Kate and Meghan drop their differences as they applaud this common cause. Natalie and Stuart, too, call a truce as they appear on screen together to show their appreciation. The screen cycles through snippets of various people clapping, whistling and honking horns at home.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Clara: Thank you very much – heroes every one of you! And it is for these heroes that Kate and Meghan are risking their pomp to most dire circumstance, as we’ll be donating our revenue from the show in support of them, bolstered by a £1 million donation from the Prince whose wife loses!

Natalie: It’s a hefty price, but not as much as a duck in our muck, which is to be avoided at any cost! But which consort has more support? [makes a cupping motion against her bra] It’s time to find out!

Clara: Ladies and gents, earlier you voted in your thousands as to which Princess deserves a Rapunzelesque rescue from the sludge. Those votes steamed across broadband and mobile networks to our central server, where they have been counted and verified. And the results… are as follows!

A sharp “oohhh” erupts from the viewership, followed by sucking of breath.

Clara: Knife-edge!

Natalie: Oh my! Kate, what do you say to that!? You play the part of Princessly perfection, the media laps it up… Everyone loves Kate, nobody likes Meghan… But look – she’s pipped you in the popularity stakes!

Kate: [harrumphs] Yes… well… it is extremely close. But if I understand correctly, Meghan and I will get equal points from this, which means I still have my [does a little dance] eight-point lead!

Clara: Mmm, she’s right, Meghan! You do have a symbolic victory, and you also get the tiebreaker advantage – which could be crucial – but dividing those percentages by five and rounding gives 10 points apiece – notching Kate up to 29 and you to 21 – so you don’t catch up at all! The sludge must be a very frightening sight to you right now!

Meghan: [fights back a stammer] N-not at all! I’m still going to win this! I aced the last physical game and Kate bummed it, and the same’ll happen for this one!

Natalie: That’s a fair point, Kate – you were royally routed in Round One. Won’t it be dreadful if you balls up Round Three and Meghan squeaks past!

Clara: Oh yeah, terrible. All those people watching… all that pressure… it’d be so easy to screw up!

Natalie: Don’t blow it, Kate!

Clara: Yeah, for goodness’ sake don’t blow it!

Meghan: [taunting voice] She’s gonna blow it!

Kate: [throws up hands] Enough!! [Regains composure] Actually Natalie, I was only two points behind Meghan in Round One, before you and Clara started nitpicking.

Natalie: Oh, how terrible of us to enforce the rules!

Kate: And I tell you right now – there’s absolutely no chance it’ll be me [thumbs over her shoulder to the pool] in that sludge!

Clara: Now that’s a quote we might need to dig up later! [Winks] But Kate and Meghan, we do sympathise with the pressure you’re under, and it’s at times like these that you need a friend to turn to.

Natalie: Kate, you’re on very friendly terms with your sister, Pippa, aren’t you?

Kate: Well of course.

Clara: And no doubt, she’ll be watching right now, and she’ll have cast her vote earlier. Are you confident she voted in support of you?

Kate: [slightly less assured] Absolutely.

At this moment, a small box opens in the corner of the screen, showing a view from a phone camera. Pippa Middleton, younger sister of Kate, can be seen sitting in a city garden, wearing a summer dress, relaxing in the evening sunshine as she eats a tub of ice cream.

In true NTV style, Pippa herself cannot see this box on the screen.

Natalie: So Pippa wouldn’t have been tempted to vote for her big sis to get sludged?

Kate: [nervous] Certainly not!

Clara: So if we were to ask her – as she sits in the garden of her multi-million pound Chelsea house, where she lives with her city banker husband…

Natalie: [whispers close to her webcam] Who’s even richer than William!

Kate: Yeah yeah, don’t go on about it.

Clara: …As she sits, scoffing a sly tub of ice cream…

On hearing this, Pippa frowns and looks at the ice cream in her hand.

Natalie: Pippa Middleton, you’re live on Grudge-2-Sludge!

Pippa’s jaw drops as her image fills the screen.

Clara: Pippa, did you vote in support of Kate?

Pippa: [remains stupefied, before eventually mustering:] Uh… hi.

Natalie: Hmm, she seems a bit starstruck, but the computer knows all, and I can reveal that Pippa did vote in support of Kate!

Kate: Hooray!

Clara: Wow, Pippa, what a saint! Most little sisters would jump at the chance to sling their big sister in the sludge – case in point Ellie from our last series! Her sister was called Kate too!

Pippa: [recovering from the shock] Oh, I dare say I have a grudge or two to settle with Kate myself. But when it’s a Middleton against the world we always stick up for each other.

Natalie: Very loyal, Pippa. And that’s a nice ice cream you’ve got there, I must say.

Pippa: [shrugs] Good thing you didn’t catch me with a gin.

Clara: Yes, it is indeed good that you’re clear-headed and alert, because you’re going to be helping Kate out, in this episode’s Find a Friend!

Natalie: Pippa, I’m afraid you’ll have to leave your ice cream, as I ask you kindly to go through your house and out of your front door…

Pippa: [pulls a nervous face] Hang on, is this a permitted reason for leaving the house?

Clara: Oh you won’t be going far. Now come on, up you get!

An anxious Pippa gets up. A few seconds later, from a camera in the street, we see her open her front door. A “beep beep beep!!” can be heard as a flatbed truck reverses into place outside her house. On the back of it is an upright perspex cubicle, about the size and shape of a phone box. A large compartment, containing a bright turquoise substance, sits at its top.

Pippa: [eyes wide] Oh no!!

The truck comes to a stop and a door on the cubicle swings open.

Natalie: Don’t worry, Pippa, it’s all been thoroughly sterilised! Now if you’d kindly step inside…!

Reluctantly, Pippa steps up onto the truck and into the cubicle. The door shuts behind her and the lock clicks. Facing her is a screen on which she can see Natalie and Clara. She glances up at the colourful compartment above her, the nozzle bearing down above her head, and winces.

Clara: Make yourself at home, Pippa, while we Find a Friend for Meghan!

Natalie: Now Meghan, it’s not very well known who your friends are…

Kate stifles a chortle.

Natalie: …but there is one lady who’s your top LA bud. She was there for your bridal shower and your wedding, and now she’s going to aid you in your hour of need!

Clara: It’s just after midday, Pacific Standard Time, and our girl is currently beating the lockdown blues by paddling on her private beach – alright for some! She’s listening to the show through her earphones, but we’ve got her on zoom lens. Say hello, Serena Williams!

Up on the screen, the bikini-clad tennis player gawps upon hearing her name.

Serena: [speaking through mic on her earphones] Oh my God!!

Natalie: Serena, it’s looking lovely over there in LA! But for your mate Meghan over here, the outlook isn’t so sunny, so I’m sure she’s heartened to hear that you voted for her.

Serena: [bewildered, scans beach for long-distance camera] Uh, yeah… sure I voted for you, Meg… We’re best friends forever!

Clara: That’s good to hear, because now’s your time to step up and help her out!

Serena’s bewilderment increases as another flatbed truck drives onto the beach. On the back is a similar perspex cubicle, but instead of turquoise, the contents of the considerably sized top compartment are custard-yellow.

Serena: How… how did that get past security?

Natalie: Let’s just say we slipped them a few dollar bills. Serena, kindly step inside if you will…

Serena: Can I put some clothes on first?

Clara: Nope! No time for that! In you get as you are!

Serena is so stunned by the whole situation that she complies with the instruction, and before she knows it she is locked inside the cubicle with the tank of yellow goo poised above her. The screen splits to show both her and Pippa.

Natalie: Ladies, if you’re regular watchers of Grudge-2-Sludge, then you’ll know how this part of the show works. You’re the partners of Kate and Meghan respectively, and it’ll be your job to assist them in the final dash for points known as Round 3!

Clara: I’m sure you’ll try as hard as possible to secure your partner’s win and their rival’s place in the sludge, but we want to give you some extra incentive, just in case!

Natalie: There’s no £250 prize in this, because frankly that kind of money is chocolate shavings on the frothy cappuccino of obscene wealth you both possess. But there is a punishment for whichever of you secures a lower score in Round 3 – even if your partner wins the match overall.

Clara: And you don’t need to be Einstein to work out what the punishment is, do you?

The pair nod gravely.

Pippa: Kate, you better not slack off just cos you’re 8 points ahead!

Serena: Meghan, can I have the number of your lawyer?

Natalie: Ah, good to see the team bonding going well! We’re gonna go off for another quick break.

Clara: Kate and Meghan, your costumes for Round Three are waiting backstage, and let me tell you, they are maid to measure!

Natalie: Bit of a clue there. [winks] Stay safe, and we’ll see you soon!


Messy Fitness

$
0
0

This story is purely a work of fiction. The story does NOT describe real events and the characters are fictional. Any resemblance to real events or persons is coincidence. In keeping with its fictional nature, the events and activities described in the story may not be legal, ethical or safe. This site does NOT endorse or recommend their enactment.

   Lauren was considered a tough fitness instructor, known for her gruelling physical routines and harsh manner for issuing commands, but she was also considered a ripe target for a little humiliation.

   Lauren approached the door, ready for the fitness class she had been specially commissioned to provide. She had prepared for the session in her usual way, tying her long, brown hair into a ponytail and dressing in her athletic clothes. She wore a light grey vest, that tightly covered her taut body and showed off her muscular arms, along with light blue shorts that ended high above her knees to display her legs, but were made from a loose material that clung to the curves of her rear.

   She had very little idea of what the class she was about to lead was like. She had never been asked to provide a service like this before, usually her classes took place on a Sunday evening and she instructed a small class of gym members that were used to pushing their body to their limits, even though her classes were usually considered tougher than most. She was excited at the prospect of being specially chosen to lead a class and imagined who would want to attend her classes so badly. She considered if the mysterious customers were elite athletes, who thought she could help them prepare for world-class competitions, or a billionaire, wanting to maintain their fitness so they could stay young and handsome forever, with Lauren being able to charge whatever she wanted and being inducted into their glamourous world.

   When she opened the door and entered the studio, she could barely hide her disappointment. There were about five men inside the room, and none had the physicality of an athlete or the obvious wealth as a rich man. Most of the men were fairly podgy, with their stomachs pushing against the fabric of their clothes, and the rest were scrawny, with thin arms and legs. Two of the class were definitely obese and their clothes strained against their bodies.

   The strangest thing about the class was that all the members were made up as clowns. Each man had painted their face white and drawn a bright red smile on their lips. Some of the men had decided to wear wigs that were a variety of bright colours, while others had worn a bald wig with no hair on top and brightly coloured hair at the sides and back. Anna could see one man just had a bald head (with a slight stubble of very short hair around the sides) with the clown makeup, but still looked miserable (like a middle-aged builder forced to look that way because they lost a bet).

   Interestingly, none were wearing a clown outfit, instead they were dressed in a variety of brightly coloured shorts and vests. One man wore an outfit covered in circles coloured yellow, pink and light purple, another wore a short white vest and white shorts covered in polka dots (like underwear from a cartoon). The “builder” wore a white string vest along with plain white shorts. In fact, many of the clowns seemed more like they were just about to put on their clothes for the workout, rather than dressed for the brutal exercise.

   As Lauren studied the men in the room, she heard the door open, followed by a shrill cackle. She turned to see two more clowns walking into the room, but these ones were fully dressed for the role. One man wore a loose onesie, coloured black and covered in bright yellow circles, with a red and yellow jester’s hat on his head. His face was fully painted white and black paint was used to create a wide grin that had a slightly sinister appearance. Black makeup was used around his eyes to enhance the creepy look. He also wore a bright red nose.

   The second man wore the same multicoloured, loose onesie and white gloves, but coloured black with a pattern consisting of dark red circles. He wore a similar hat, but his was red and black in colour. His face was also painted white and had a wide smile painted on his face with bright red paint. Two black eyebrows were drawn on his forehead that ended just above his eyes, but arched upwards like a pair of semicircles. Lauren watched as the two new clowns, one looking wicked and mischievous and the other looking happy and dopey, walked towards her.

   “OK, Boys and Girls” the dopier clown called out as he and the other clown positioned themselves either side of Lauren “We have got a surprise for you today”. Lauren barely noticed that both clowns had lightly pushed her shoulders to force her to walk forwards a few steps, as if positioning her.

   “He’s Slip” the mischievous clown said.

  “He’s Slop” the other replied.

  “And she’s Lauren. And Lauren has agreed to give you a treat” Slop told them, his voice rough and quiet, which made him sound a little frightening.

  “That’s right” Slip responded. His voice was loud and strange sounding, as if he were about to start guffawing at any moment. “She is going to give you a fitness class”.

   Slip’s last comment caused the assembled clowns to groan loudly and hold their foreheads in exaggerated despair.

   “But don’t worry, she will keep you entertained” Slop told them with a little laugh.

   “Yes, she is known to be tough and demanding…” Slip started to tell them

   “…And someone will be rightfully punished at the end” Slop said, winking at the class and giggling quietly.

   Upon hearing this, Lauren smiled indulgently. Lauren had always felt that a little humiliation helped her classes try harder and it was always fun to punish the least fit person. Lauren allowed her expression to become more arrogant as she studied her class, deciding who was the most likely candidate for the punishment.

   “I hear you have a special routine for your classes” Slip said.

   “Yes, I do” she replied. “I make everyone do press ups and I tell them a story. They must keep doing press ups until I say a special word, then they can stop. And you better make sure you do not give up before the end” she said, smiling and wagging her finger.

   “You definitely want to stay until the end” Slop told them, giggling again “There might be a prize”.

   “But what about the story?” Slip asked “Do you know what you will tell us?”

   Lauren stopped to think, putting a finger to her lips.

   “How about a story about you going shopping? And then making a pizza?” Slop suggested, his speech punctuated by sniggers.

   “Good idea” she replied. Slop turned to the other clowns and gave a very wicked grin, like he was sharing a nasty private joke with everyone else.

   “OK, how about you start and the two of us will go and come back later” Slip said.

   Slip and Slop turned and walked out the door while the class started. Lauren, using a strong, authoritative tone, commanded the clowns to start doing press ups. The class got into position, moaning and groaning to show their displeasure, while Lauren stood at the front, making sure they were going to do the press-ups correctly before starting.

   While Lauren started the class, Slop and Slip had climbed some stairs and entered a room directly above the studio. Inside the room was a large container surrounded by several plastic buckets. The two clowns walked to the container and looked down. The device was built into the floor of the room and contained a series of dividers that also had small lids built into them. The purpose of the dividers was that they created small compartments in the container, this allowed the user to pour stuff into the lowest accessible compartment. The user would then use the lid to seal off the compartment and then they could pour something else into the container and it would flow into a separate compartment without mixing with the previous material. A tube at the bottom was used to drain the container and the user could also use the lids to empty each compartment separately.

   Slop giggled in his low, creepy voice and Slip guffawed at a loud volume as they looked at the plastic buckets standing around the container, each one containing something disgusting. “I hope we have the right stuff” Slip whispered as both him and Slop rubbed their hands with glee. This perfect moment was completed by Lauren’s voice, barking orders, from underneath the drainage tube.

   Lauren stood in front of the clowns. “OK, everyone, now we’ll do something really special. First, everyone start doing press-ups”. The clowns all obeyed, slowly lowering themselves to the floor and getting into position. “I am going to tell a story, and everyone has to keep doing press-ups while I am talking”. She surveyed the room, making sure each person was doing the exercise properly. “When I say a special word, only then can you stop. The special word is pizza”. As she stood proudly, with her hands on her hips and her legs apart in a dominant pose, she thought she heard someone snigger when she mentioned the word.

   “One day I went to the shops.” Lauren announced, adding a commanding tone to her voice. “I bought some food.”

   In the room above her, Slip and Slop giggled while they prepared themselves for what was going to happen next.

   The clowns all watched her, stifling their laughs. They could see her light grey vest enclosing her tough body, the fabric of the clothes slightly straining at her sides and stomach to emphasise her muscles. The garment also made her breasts look bigger, with the tight material showing how they stood out from the rest of her body and formed a smooth skin that covered them. Her light blue shorts flowed in some wind, the light dancing off them so that dark shadows and light ripples gently blew across them, suggesting the shape of her legs underneath. The shorts hinted at her strong legs as they clung to the curves of her thighs.

   “I bought some tomatoes…” Lauren announced.

   Slop lifted a plastic bucket and poured the contents in the container. Slip, giggling quietly, used his finger to touch the dark red colour of the mashed tomatoes and the remains of some of the pulverised fruit. The tomatoes flowed into the container before coming to a stop at the bottom, providing a beginning to the mess that will be created.

    “…Some cheese…” Lauren continued.

   Slop lifted another plastic bucket. While the contents poured into the container, Slip pulled a sickened face and pinched his nose to exaggerate a bad smell. The contents, a bright yellow runny liquid, flowed into the container, resting above the tomatoes.

   “…Some pistachio ice-cream…” Lauren said, prolonging saying the “p” so the class would think the exercise was about to end. It seemed to work; some the clowns gasped in delight when she said it.

   Slop lifted another plastic bucket, continuing to laugh in a low, sinister voice. Slip looked on delighted and rubbed his stomach as Slop poured in some pistachio ice-cream. The ice-cream was light green, but had obviously melted a little because it was fairly runny, with some visible, solid chunks moving in the liquid. As the ice-cream poured into the container, Slip placed a finger in it and put the foodstuff into his mouth. He gave a shudder of satisfaction.

   “…Some chocolate sauce…” Lauren told them, with a light smirk as she taunted them with the food they loved, but caused them to need to lose weight.

   Slop lifted a plastic bucket and poured in a dark brown liquid. Slip started licking his lips as the sauce entered the container.

   “…And then I went home to have some nice pistachio ice-cream and chocolate sauce.” Lauren told them, smiling.

   Lauren stopped. She smugly watched the clowns struggling to keep doing press-ups. All the clowns were getting sweaty and red as their bodies strained while performing the exercises. Some of the class were doing slower press-ups and making loud grunting noises as they ran out of energy, while others seemed to apply more effort, as if determined to complete the routine. Lauren also noticed that all the clowns seemed to be gasping, as if anticipating a reward, and most had a look of delight on their faces as they watched her.

   “After that, I had a nice pizza.” Lauren exclaimed, with a slight hint of a smile.

   Although they had stopped exercising, none of the clowns had moved from their positions. All the class were watching her with broad smiles on their faces, with some quietly laughing. As Lauren watched this slightly eerie scene, she felt something drip onto her right shoulder.

   She looked down to see some pulverised red material gently sliding down her muscular arm. She felt something else gently drop onto the top of her head and slide in among her brown hair. She looked up just in time to see a cascade of red liquid and bits of tomato falling towards her in a torrent. She made a short, yelping noise.

   As she stood paused, with her head covered in a red liquid that ran down her face, and her mouth frozen in a shocked expression, she heard loud hooting noises, as the clowns got to their feet and started laughing in the way that increased her feeling of humiliation. Through the mess, she could see some of them pointing at her and others falling around in enjoyment. A lot seemed to particularly enjoy the scream she made when she got hit.

   Her body, with her two arms thrown out to the sides in a frozen posture of surprise, was suddenly hit by a wave of bright yellow liquid from above. The clowns kept guffawing as Lauren was overcome by the smell of old cheese as the sun-coloured liquid slowly crept down her body, their enjoyment significantly increased by her displeasure. Her light grey vest and light blue shorts were now covered by a mix of red and yellow mess.

   Feeling her irritation rise, Lauren started to move her mouth to complain, but was hit by a torrent of light green, runny liquid. The melted ice-cream covered her brown hair and ran down her face quicker than the tomato juice and cheese, causing a slight chill as it flowed over her body. The ice-cream spread down her arms and body. Some of it pooled in her cleavage before running between her breasts like a cold stream. She could feel it run down her vest and shorts before it flowed down her legs. Some of it had found gaps between the waistband of her shorts and her hips, freezing the top of her legs and backside. She also felt a solid chunk of ice-cream slowly run down her cheek, its presence signalled by it’s cold temperature.

   The clowns laughed harder as Lauren rose to stand on her toes due to the discomfort caused by her backside being covered in cold liquid. The laughter became louder when the chocolate sauce was dropped onto Lauren. She stared, exasperated, with her mouth hanging wide open, as the sauce quickly flowed down her face, explored her arms, followed the curves of her torso, stained her vest and shorts, clung to the curves of her legs and pooled at the bottom of her feet. The clowns applauded as they looked at the woman covered in red, yellow, green and brown liquid.

   “OK, Boys and Girls, thank you.” Slip said as he appeared at the entrance. “You have all done really well and I want… Slop? What are you doing?” He asked as Slop appeared, pushing a trolley, covered with a towel, into the room.

   “Well, Slip” Slop said as he positioned the trolley between the class and the messy Lauren “We promised that someone would be rightfully punished at the end of the class, which is what happened.” He gestured to Lauren, who looked at him with an uncertain expression. “But you promised that they would get a prize for staying until the end.” Lauren looked at Slip, a feeling of hurt evident in her eyes.

   “I decided that, as a reward, these gentlemen can have a go at throwing these…” Slop whipped off the towel, revealing the trolley to contain 5 custard pies, each one covered in white foam “…at a target.”

   “Lauren.” Slip said “Would you agree that throwing projectiles at a target is another form of exercise?”

   Lauren paused for a moment, a look of worried contemplation written on her face before she nodded sadly. This caused a great, manly cheer to issue from the assembled clowns.

   One of the clowns, a very happy looking man with a large body, ran to the trolley. He lifted one of the pies, took a moment to take aim and, with a high-pitched, mocking laugh, threw it. The pie flew through the air, before striking Lauren in the middle of the face. The foam created a thick white mask on her face, before running down her cheeks and her chin. The clowns cheered as Lauren’s slightly irritated expression appeared.

   Another clown ran up. This clown had a long, thin body and wore white shirt and shorts decorated with polka dots, like he had come to the class in his underwear. He lifted another pie. He extended his arm forward, as if about to throw it, before pulling it back. He repeated this motion a few times, making a high-pitched “Ha” sound each time, before saying “Ha HA” and throwing the pie. The pie hit Lauren at the top of her chest, so that the foam started flowing into her cleavage. The clowns made a rowdier cheer this time.

   The clown dressed in the outfit decorated with yellow, pink and light purple circles took his turn next. He ran to the trolley in awkward motions, while laughing goofily, and picked up a pie. “Bing, bang, boom.” He cried, before chucking the pie and returning to the class, making the goofy laugh. The pie hit Lauren’s stomach, causing the material of her shorts to stick to her thighs and waist. The foam mixed with the rest of the mess covering the clothes, before falling to the floor at Lauren’s feet.

   “Oh, dear.” Slip announced, his hands at his cheeks in a gesture of mock concern. “Look at what you have done to her clothes.” Lauren, meanwhile, remained rooted to the spot.

   Lauren stood still as Slop said, in a sly way, “Don’t worry, I’ll help her” and did not react when he crept over to her in an exaggerated manner. Lauren remained frozen as Slop hooked his thumbs between her body and the smooth fabric of her shorts at either end of her hips. She did not move even as she felt the shorts, along with the various foods that had been trapped in the material, slip down along her muscular legs. Soon she was still standing with each arm spread out and her messed shorts forming a messy pile at her feet, with bright white panties covering her groin. The fact that the skin covered by the shorts were clean highlighted this part of Lauren’s body, along with the satin panties that reflected the light and emphasised the contours of her groin.

   “Now, Slop.” Slip tried to remonstrate as a great cheer rose from the assembled clowns. “You have ruined the surprise, who would want to throw any of the remaining pies at this poor, humiliated girl.” As he finished speaking, another pie flew through the air and hit Lauren’s panties. Her hips thrust back and forth following the effect of the impact and her eyes and mouth opened to form an expression of horror.

   “C’mon, Slop.” Slip said with a stern tone. “I think this poor girl has had enough, just look at her face.”

   “I don’t know, do you think she has had enough, gentlemen?”

   The clowns all cried “No” together in a variety of silly voices, some of them even using their arms to signify that the practice should continue.

   “And there is still one pie left.” Slop continued.

   Slip paused to consider, his chin resting on his hand. Lauren turned to face him and shook her head slightly, her face an expression of pleading.

   “OK.” Slip announced.

   Lauren looked relieved as Slop grabbed her shoulders and gently turned her around. She walked around awkwardly, trying to keep her movements minimal to prevent the tomatoes, cheese, ice-cream and chocolate sauce from running down her body. She tried to move her feet, but they were obstructed by her shorts, which made her movements even more ungainly. When she had fully turned around, Slop suddenly pushed her back. She bent down and exposed her backside, covered only by the white panties, to the clowns.

    The clown resembling a builder ran forwards and picked up the last pie. Lauren heard a great roar of encouragement from the rest of the class and braced for impact. She felt the force of the foam-filled pie strike the middle of her backside, the foam sliding down her thighs and causing her underwear to stick to her skin. As she felt her body rock forwards after the heavy impact, she felt her feet try to move while trapped in her shorts. She tried to stay upright, but, with the class crying “Oh” as they monitored her attempts, she suddenly fell forwards and landed on the floor.

This story is purely a work of fiction. The story does NOT describe real events and the characters are fictional. Any resemblance to real events or persons is coincidence. In keeping with its fictional nature, the events and activities described in the story may not be legal, ethical or safe. This site does NOT endorse or recommend their enactment.

   Lauren was considered a tough fitness instructor, known for her gruelling physical routines and harsh manner for issuing commands, but she was also considered a ripe target for a little humiliation.

   Lauren approached the door, ready for the fitness class she had been specially commissioned to provide. She had prepared for the session in her usual way, tying her long, brown hair into a ponytail and dressing in her athletic clothes. She wore a light grey vest, that tightly covered her taut body and showed off her muscular arms, along with light blue shorts that ended high above her knees to display her legs, but were made from a loose material that clung to the curves of her rear.

   She had very little idea of what the class she was about to lead was like. She had never been asked to provide a service like this before, usually her classes took place on a Sunday evening and she instructed a small class of gym members that were used to pushing their body to their limits, even though her classes were usually considered tougher than most. She was excited at the prospect of being specially chosen to lead a class and imagined who would want to attend her classes so badly. She considered if the mysterious customers were elite athletes, who thought she could help them prepare for world-class competitions, or a billionaire, wanting to maintain their fitness so they could stay young and handsome forever, with Lauren being able to charge whatever she wanted and being inducted into their glamourous world.

   When she opened the door and entered the studio, she could barely hide her disappointment. There were about five men inside the room, and none had the physicality of an athlete or the obvious wealth as a rich man. Most of the men were fairly podgy, with their stomachs pushing against the fabric of their clothes, and the rest were scrawny, with thin arms and legs. Two of the class were definitely obese and their clothes strained against their bodies.

   The strangest thing about the class was that all the members were made up as clowns. Each man had painted their face white and drawn a bright red smile on their lips. Some of the men had decided to wear wigs that were a variety of bright colours, while others had worn a bald wig with no hair on top and brightly coloured hair at the sides and back. Anna could see one man just had a bald head (with a slight stubble of very short hair around the sides) with the clown makeup, but still looked miserable (like a middle-aged builder forced to look that way because they lost a bet).

   Interestingly, none were wearing a clown outfit, instead they were dressed in a variety of brightly coloured shorts and vests. One man wore an outfit covered in circles coloured yellow, pink and light purple, another wore a short white vest and white shorts covered in polka dots (like underwear from a cartoon). The “builder” wore a white string vest along with plain white shorts. In fact, many of the clowns seemed more like they were just about to put on their clothes for the workout, rather than dressed for the brutal exercise.

   As Lauren studied the men in the room, she heard the door open, followed by a shrill cackle. She turned to see two more clowns walking into the room, but these ones were fully dressed for the role. One man wore a loose onesie, coloured black and covered in bright yellow circles, with a red and yellow jester’s hat on his head. His face was fully painted white and black paint was used to create a wide grin that had a slightly sinister appearance. Black makeup was used around his eyes to enhance the creepy look. He also wore a bright red nose.

   The second man wore the same multicoloured, loose onesie and white gloves, but coloured black with a pattern consisting of dark red circles. He wore a similar hat, but his was red and black in colour. His face was also painted white and had a wide smile painted on his face with bright red paint. Two black eyebrows were drawn on his forehead that ended just above his eyes, but arched upwards like a pair of semicircles. Lauren watched as the two new clowns, one looking wicked and mischievous and the other looking happy and dopey, walked towards her.

   “OK, Boys and Girls” the dopier clown called out as he and the other clown positioned themselves either side of Lauren “We have got a surprise for you today”. Lauren barely noticed that both clowns had lightly pushed her shoulders to force her to walk forwards a few steps, as if positioning her.

   “He’s Slip” the mischievous clown said.

  “He’s Slop” the other replied.

  “And she’s Lauren. And Lauren has agreed to give you a treat” Slop told them, his voice rough and quiet, which made him sound a little frightening.

  “That’s right” Slip responded. His voice was loud and strange sounding, as if he were about to start guffawing at any moment. “She is going to give you a fitness class”.

   Slip’s last comment caused the assembled clowns to groan loudly and hold their foreheads in exaggerated despair.

   “But don’t worry, she will keep you entertained” Slop told them with a little laugh.

   “Yes, she is known to be tough and demanding…” Slip started to tell them

   “…And someone will be rightfully punished at the end” Slop said, winking at the class and giggling quietly.

   Upon hearing this, Lauren smiled indulgently. Lauren had always felt that a little humiliation helped her classes try harder and it was always fun to punish the least fit person. Lauren allowed her expression to become more arrogant as she studied her class, deciding who was the most likely candidate for the punishment.

   “I hear you have a special routine for your classes” Slip said.

   “Yes, I do” she replied. “I make everyone do press ups and I tell them a story. They must keep doing press ups until I say a special word, then they can stop. And you better make sure you do not give up before the end” she said, smiling and wagging her finger.

   “You definitely want to stay until the end” Slop told them, giggling again “There might be a prize”.

   “But what about the story?” Slip asked “Do you know what you will tell us?”

   Lauren stopped to think, putting a finger to her lips.

   “How about a story about you going shopping? And then making a pizza?” Slop suggested, his speech punctuated by sniggers.

   “Good idea” she replied. Slop turned to the other clowns and gave a very wicked grin, like he was sharing a nasty private joke with everyone else.

   “OK, how about you start and the two of us will go and come back later” Slip said.

   Slip and Slop turned and walked out the door while the class started. Lauren, using a strong, authoritative tone, commanded the clowns to start doing press ups. The class got into position, moaning and groaning to show their displeasure, while Lauren stood at the front, making sure they were going to do the press-ups correctly before starting.

   While Lauren started the class, Slop and Slip had climbed some stairs and entered a room directly above the studio. Inside the room was a large container surrounded by several plastic buckets. The two clowns walked to the container and looked down. The device was built into the floor of the room and contained a series of dividers that also had small lids built into them. The purpose of the dividers was that they created small compartments in the container, this allowed the user to pour stuff into the lowest accessible compartment. The user would then use the lid to seal off the compartment and then they could pour something else into the container and it would flow into a separate compartment without mixing with the previous material. A tube at the bottom was used to drain the container and the user could also use the lids to empty each compartment separately.

   Slop giggled in his low, creepy voice and Slip guffawed at a loud volume as they looked at the plastic buckets standing around the container, each one containing something disgusting. “I hope we have the right stuff” Slip whispered as both him and Slop rubbed their hands with glee. This perfect moment was completed by Lauren’s voice, barking orders, from underneath the drainage tube.

   Lauren stood in front of the clowns. “OK, everyone, now we’ll do something really special. First, everyone start doing press-ups”. The clowns all obeyed, slowly lowering themselves to the floor and getting into position. “I am going to tell a story, and everyone has to keep doing press-ups while I am talking”. She surveyed the room, making sure each person was doing the exercise properly. “When I say a special word, only then can you stop. The special word is pizza”. As she stood proudly, with her hands on her hips and her legs apart in a dominant pose, she thought she heard someone snigger when she mentioned the word.

   “One day I went to the shops.” Lauren announced, adding a commanding tone to her voice. “I bought some food.”

   In the room above her, Slip and Slop giggled while they prepared themselves for what was going to happen next.

   The clowns all watched her, stifling their laughs. They could see her light grey vest enclosing her tough body, the fabric of the clothes slightly straining at her sides and stomach to emphasise her muscles. The garment also made her breasts look bigger, with the tight material showing how they stood out from the rest of her body and formed a smooth skin that covered them. Her light blue shorts flowed in some wind, the light dancing off them so that dark shadows and light ripples gently blew across them, suggesting the shape of her legs underneath. The shorts hinted at her strong legs as they clung to the curves of her thighs.

   “I bought some tomatoes…” Lauren announced.

   Slop lifted a plastic bucket and poured the contents in the container. Slip, giggling quietly, used his finger to touch the dark red colour of the mashed tomatoes and the remains of some of the pulverised fruit. The tomatoes flowed into the container before coming to a stop at the bottom, providing a beginning to the mess that will be created.

    “…Some cheese…” Lauren continued.

   Slop lifted another plastic bucket. While the contents poured into the container, Slip pulled a sickened face and pinched his nose to exaggerate a bad smell. The contents, a bright yellow runny liquid, flowed into the container, resting above the tomatoes.

   “…Some pistachio ice-cream…” Lauren said, prolonging saying the “p” so the class would think the exercise was about to end. It seemed to work; some the clowns gasped in delight when she said it.

   Slop lifted another plastic bucket, continuing to laugh in a low, sinister voice. Slip looked on delighted and rubbed his stomach as Slop poured in some pistachio ice-cream. The ice-cream was light green, but had obviously melted a little because it was fairly runny, with some visible, solid chunks moving in the liquid. As the ice-cream poured into the container, Slip placed a finger in it and put the foodstuff into his mouth. He gave a shudder of satisfaction.

   “…Some chocolate sauce…” Lauren told them, with a light smirk as she taunted them with the food they loved, but caused them to need to lose weight.

   Slop lifted a plastic bucket and poured in a dark brown liquid. Slip started licking his lips as the sauce entered the container.

   “…And then I went home to have some nice pistachio ice-cream and chocolate sauce.” Lauren told them, smiling.

   Lauren stopped. She smugly watched the clowns struggling to keep doing press-ups. All the clowns were getting sweaty and red as their bodies strained while performing the exercises. Some of the class were doing slower press-ups and making loud grunting noises as they ran out of energy, while others seemed to apply more effort, as if determined to complete the routine. Lauren also noticed that all the clowns seemed to be gasping, as if anticipating a reward, and most had a look of delight on their faces as they watched her.

   “After that, I had a nice pizza.” Lauren exclaimed, with a slight hint of a smile.

   Although they had stopped exercising, none of the clowns had moved from their positions. All the class were watching her with broad smiles on their faces, with some quietly laughing. As Lauren watched this slightly eerie scene, she felt something drip onto her right shoulder.

   She looked down to see some pulverised red material gently sliding down her muscular arm. She felt something else gently drop onto the top of her head and slide in among her brown hair. She looked up just in time to see a cascade of red liquid and bits of tomato falling towards her in a torrent. She made a short, yelping noise.

   As she stood paused, with her head covered in a red liquid that ran down her face, and her mouth frozen in a shocked expression, she heard loud hooting noises, as the clowns got to their feet and started laughing in the way that increased her feeling of humiliation. Through the mess, she could see some of them pointing at her and others falling around in enjoyment. A lot seemed to particularly enjoy the scream she made when she got hit.

   Her body, with her two arms thrown out to the sides in a frozen posture of surprise, was suddenly hit by a wave of bright yellow liquid from above. The clowns kept guffawing as Lauren was overcome by the smell of old cheese as the sun-coloured liquid slowly crept down her body, their enjoyment significantly increased by her displeasure. Her light grey vest and light blue shorts were now covered by a mix of red and yellow mess.

   Feeling her irritation rise, Lauren started to move her mouth to complain, but was hit by a torrent of light green, runny liquid. The melted ice-cream covered her brown hair and ran down her face quicker than the tomato juice and cheese, causing a slight chill as it flowed over her body. The ice-cream spread down her arms and body. Some of it pooled in her cleavage before running between her breasts like a cold stream. She could feel it run down her vest and shorts before it flowed down her legs. Some of it had found gaps between the waistband of her shorts and her hips, freezing the top of her legs and backside. She also felt a solid chunk of ice-cream slowly run down her cheek, its presence signalled by it’s cold temperature.

   The clowns laughed harder as Lauren rose to stand on her toes due to the discomfort caused by her backside being covered in cold liquid. The laughter became louder when the chocolate sauce was dropped onto Lauren. She stared, exasperated, with her mouth hanging wide open, as the sauce quickly flowed down her face, explored her arms, followed the curves of her torso, stained her vest and shorts, clung to the curves of her legs and pooled at the bottom of her feet. The clowns applauded as they looked at the woman covered in red, yellow, green and brown liquid.

   “OK, Boys and Girls, thank you.” Slip said as he appeared at the entrance. “You have all done really well and I want… Slop? What are you doing?” He asked as Slop appeared, pushing a trolley, covered with a towel, into the room.

   “Well, Slip” Slop said as he positioned the trolley between the class and the messy Lauren “We promised that someone would be rightfully punished at the end of the class, which is what happened.” He gestured to Lauren, who looked at him with an uncertain expression. “But you promised that they would get a prize for staying until the end.” Lauren looked at Slip, a feeling of hurt evident in her eyes.

   “I decided that, as a reward, these gentlemen can have a go at throwing these…” Slop whipped off the towel, revealing the trolley to contain 5 custard pies, each one covered in white foam “…at a target.”

   “Lauren.” Slip said “Would you agree that throwing projectiles at a target is another form of exercise?”

   Lauren paused for a moment, a look of worried contemplation written on her face before she nodded sadly. This caused a great, manly cheer to issue from the assembled clowns.

   One of the clowns, a very happy looking man with a large body, ran to the trolley. He lifted one of the pies, took a moment to take aim and, with a high-pitched, mocking laugh, threw it. The pie flew through the air, before striking Lauren in the middle of the face. The foam created a thick white mask on her face, before running down her cheeks and her chin. The clowns cheered as Lauren’s slightly irritated expression appeared.

   Another clown ran up. This clown had a long, thin body and wore white shirt and shorts decorated with polka dots, like he had come to the class in his underwear. He lifted another pie. He extended his arm forward, as if about to throw it, before pulling it back. He repeated this motion a few times, making a high-pitched “Ha” sound each time, before saying “Ha HA” and throwing the pie. The pie hit Lauren at the top of her chest, so that the foam started flowing into her cleavage. The clowns made a rowdier cheer this time.

   The clown dressed in the outfit decorated with yellow, pink and light purple circles took his turn next. He ran to the trolley in awkward motions, while laughing goofily, and picked up a pie. “Bing, bang, boom.” He cried, before chucking the pie and returning to the class, making the goofy laugh. The pie hit Lauren’s stomach, causing the material of her shorts to stick to her thighs and waist. The foam mixed with the rest of the mess covering the clothes, before falling to the floor at Lauren’s feet.

   “Oh, dear.” Slip announced, his hands at his cheeks in a gesture of mock concern. “Look at what you have done to her clothes.” Lauren, meanwhile, remained rooted to the spot.

   Lauren stood still as Slop said, in a sly way, “Don’t worry, I’ll help her” and did not react when he crept over to her in an exaggerated manner. Lauren remained frozen as Slop hooked his thumbs between her body and the smooth fabric of her shorts at either end of her hips. She did not move even as she felt the shorts, along with the various foods that had been trapped in the material, slip down along her muscular legs. Soon she was still standing with each arm spread out and her messed shorts forming a messy pile at her feet, with bright white panties covering her groin. The fact that the skin covered by the shorts were clean highlighted this part of Lauren’s body, along with the satin panties that reflected the light and emphasised the contours of her groin.

   “Now, Slop.” Slip tried to remonstrate as a great cheer rose from the assembled clowns. “You have ruined the surprise, who would want to throw any of the remaining pies at this poor, humiliated girl.” As he finished speaking, another pie flew through the air and hit Lauren’s panties. Her hips thrust back and forth following the effect of the impact and her eyes and mouth opened to form an expression of horror.

   “C’mon, Slop.” Slip said with a stern tone. “I think this poor girl has had enough, just look at her face.”

   “I don’t know, do you think she has had enough, gentlemen?”

   The clowns all cried “No” together in a variety of silly voices, some of them even using their arms to signify that the practice should continue.

   “And there is still one pie left.” Slop continued.

   Slip paused to consider, his chin resting on his hand. Lauren turned to face him and shook her head slightly, her face an expression of pleading.

   “OK.” Slip announced.

   Lauren looked relieved as Slop grabbed her shoulders and gently turned her around. She walked around awkwardly, trying to keep her movements minimal to prevent the tomatoes, cheese, ice-cream and chocolate sauce from running down her body. She tried to move her feet, but they were obstructed by her shorts, which made her movements even more ungainly. When she had fully turned around, Slop suddenly pushed her back. She bent down and exposed her backside, covered only by the white panties, to the clowns.

    The clown resembling a builder ran forwards and picked up the last pie. Lauren heard a great roar of encouragement from the rest of the class and braced for impact. She felt the force of the foam-filled pie strike the middle of her backside, the foam sliding down her thighs and causing her underwear to stick to her skin. As she felt her body rock forwards after the heavy impact, she felt her feet try to move while trapped in her shorts. She tried to stay upright, but, with the class crying “Oh” as they monitored her attempts, she suddenly fell forwards and landed on the floor.

   She lay on the floor, the food covered her proud body and stained her clothes, foam covered her private areas, her shorts were little more than a small pile of ruined fabric at her feet and her panties were boldly visible against her skin. She heard the sound of loud applause and goofy laughter in a collection of voices as the clowns watched her humiliation with enjoyment. In that moment, she was no longer a military-like, dictatorial instructor, she was an embarrassed woman lying in a pool of mess with her underwear showing.

Holly’s House Party: Season 1 Episode 4

$
0
0

Although this story mentions real persons, corporations, TV shows and places, it is purely a work of fiction for personal enjoyment. The story does NOT describe real events and should NOT be taken to accurately portray any real entity mentioned. In keeping with its fictional nature, the events and activities described in the story may not be legal, ethical or safe. This site does NOT endorse or recommend their enactment.

4f7c27c8aa9e409fd82a59b6cbeda53e (1)

Holly welcomed the audience back “Now, its time to for the conclusion of our ‘Battle of the soap opera babes’!” The bell rang, and Holly ran over to the carwash set that spun out from the wall. Sitting in front of the set was Indiana Evans

Indiana-Evans

and Rhiannon Fish

Hall+Pass+Sydney+Premiere+M_IMJTLFTGjx

Holly began “The hour has come, one of these babes will be getting gunged, girls how are you feeling?” Indiana spoke first “Still nervous, but I think the people are gonna spare me.” Rhiannon spoke up next “Im dreading it, I really am. I almost dont wanna look!” The audience laughed and Holly continued “Lets see how the voting has been going. This is the final tally!” The graphic tallied up the scores. Finally, the results were shown.

The crowd erupted in applause, while Indiana sunk in her chair and Rhiannon clapped. Holly bellowed “And there we have it! Indiana, Im afraid thats some bad news for you.” Indiana frowned and whined “All those people voted me to get gunged?” before standing up and walking over to the chair that awaited her. Holly and Rhiannon followed, the latter looking morbidly interested in the fate that had befallen Indiana, a fate that she herself had avoided. She took a seat and looked up apprehensively at the gunge tank perched above the “carwash.” Holly began again “Indiana, you were chosen, this is your fate!” Indiana let out a little yell as the chair moved forward into the large, wet brushes. Indiana was hidden for a few seconds, before she reappeared with water on her face, her clothes wet, and her hair wet and rustled.

The car moved forward when it suddenly stopped, and the NHP gunge horn sounded. Indiana tensed up, waiting for what was about to happen. The crowd waited, as did Holly and Rhiannon. And then, as promised, a torrent of thick blue gunge shot downward, landing squarely on her head. It moved with force down her face and down her hair, leaving it an unrecognizable blue mass. It landed on her clothes, on her legs, and on her shoes. She hastily tried to wipe it away from her face, but the gunge kept flowing over her and covering her face, leaving her holding her hands in an expression that could only be understand as “Seriously?” Rhiannon’s mouth was agape at the throughness of the gunging, and that there was a chance that that could have been her.

Finally the gunge ceased, and the car moved forward and spun out to have Indiana face the audience to applause, her eyes, mouth, and nose hidden behind a gooey blue wall. Gunge dripped off of her head, and she finally wiped her eyes, peering out to the audience. She threw her gunge-covered hands to the floor in disgust. There was a definite look of humiliation in her gunge-covered face. Her mouth opened, and she began to meekly laugh at her situation. “This is so gross, oh my god.” she said quietly. Holly began again “Oh Indiana, Im sorry this happened to you, I truly am. But such is the risk here on the House Party.” Indiana defiantly flicked gunge at Holly and Rhiannon, cause both clean girls to recoil. “Hey watch it!” snapped a chuckling Holly. “Believe me, we have plenty more gunge that we could poor on you! Anyway, good-bye ladies!” The set spun away with Rhiannon waving goodbye, while Indiana became virtually frozen in a state of shock and humiliation. Holly strolled away “Ya gotta love a good gunging. And there will be plenty of that next week…”

Note From the Network: Next week on the House Party, some athletes stop by before heading off to the Olympics. Another old game makes a return as well…

 

 

Totty Episode 1 Part 2 Dani Dyer and Elizabeth Hurley

$
0
0

Although this story mentions real persons, corporations, TV shows and places, it is purely a work of fiction for personal enjoyment. The story does NOT describe real events and should NOT be taken to accurately portray any real entity mentioned. In keeping with its fictional nature, the events and activities described in the story may not be legal, ethical or safe. This site does NOT endorse or recommend their enactment.This story will contain scenes of nudity and/or a sexual nature. 

“Welcome back to Part 2 of the opening episode of Totty” said a messy Katie Thistleton. “We had some fun in the first part with Ella Henderson, Lauren Platt and Cher Lloyd aka The Hot Totties who sang our new theme song “If Pie Could Turn Back Slime” said an equally messy Amber Gill. “They are the Hot Totties but we are the Totty Hoties” added an even more messy Maisie Smith.

Amber, Maisie and Katie were wearing these outfits

“Joining us in this part will be Dani Dyer the daughter of Danny Dyer” Amber said. “Hot Totties, Totty Hoties, Dani Dyer, Danny Dyer. I’m getting confused. But –” said Maisie. The audience responded “What Am I Like” along with Maisie as Katie gave her a pie in the face. “Our other rule is of course. If you take it off –” Katie said unzipping her dress and letting it drop to the floor. “It stays off” she chorused with the audience as she stood there in just a blue thong her nice boobs and small belly on view. “I never thought I’d be comfortable doing this. But I love it now” she said laughing and shaking her breasts.

“We will also be linking up with our Executive Producers Thandie Newton and Rosamund Pike. Who will be chatting to their special guest Liz Hurley” Amber said. “You just know that will be so naughty. They have all promised to be in bikinis or likely less. Liz got messy in The Royals and was soaked in a teaser on the Tiswas/OTT reunion where we all know how crazy and extreme Thandie and Roz got” Katie added. “You know Dani Dyer says Perf with Surf. I think it should be Perf as a Smurf” Maisie said laughing. “Perf as a Smurf?” Katie said. “Yes you would” replied Maisie as Amber emptied a bucket of blue gunge over Katie’s head. It took Katie by surprise as it ran down her face and onto her breasts. “It’s cold on my tits” she shouted laughing.

“Let’s welcome our special guest Dani Dyer” said Amber. Dani walked on holding a Pineapple in a sexy tie bikini.

She hugged all the girls. “A tie bikini. That will be tempting to pull open later” Amber joked. “Leave my thruppenies alone for the moment” Dani replied laughing. “Why the pineapple?” Katie asked. “I thought we could be a masochistic version of the cake sitting Ella did in part one” Dani said jokingly “Perf with Surf” Maisie replied mocking Dani. “No it’s Perf as a Smurf” Dani responded laughing knowing what would happen. Katie emptied a bucket of blue gunge over Dani’s head. She stood there laughing as it ran down her honey blonde hair, over her eyes and onto her ample bosom. “I’ve never used this brand of sunscreen before” she said as she rubbed it into her boobs and belly. “Oh it’s Perf as a Smurf” I get it now said Maisie as Katie emptied another bucket of blue gunge this time over Maisie’s head. “I like to sunbathe topless” Maisie said and took her lycra top off. “If you take it off, it stays off” she chorussed with the audience as her large impressive boobs bounced free and she liberally rubbed the blue gunge and other mess into them.

“I’ll be interviewing Dani on our bespoke Totty sun loungers where I have a feeling we may do some topless sunbathing and things might take a messy turn” Amber said. “I’m up for that” Dani said giggling.

“Now lets hook up with Thandie, Roz and their special guest Liz Hurley. They are at Thandie’s beachfront house in LA” said Katie.

They cut to the 3 ladies. Rosamund was in a bikini but Liz and Thandie were only in bikini bottoms but were covering up their boobs.

Rosamund, Liz and Thandie

“You older ladies don’t mess about getting the clothes off?” Amber suggested. “If you’ve got it flaunt it” said Thandie turning to the camera and doing a star job so her pert boobs bounced up and down. “I’ve still got it and I certainly still flaunt it” Liz said dropping her hands to reveal her impressive breasts as the audience cheered. “My sunscreen is rubbish. I’d rather be Perf as a Smurf” she added unable to stop giggling as Rosamund emptied the inevitable bucket of blue gunge over her head. “I’m Perf as a Smurf” Liz gamely repeated and Thandie this time emptied a bucket of blue gunge over Liz’s head. The gunge slowly ran down her luscious long chestnut lots. Slowly ran down her face and onto her boobs. Rosamund and Thandie sensually rubbed it into Liz’s boobs as she giggled. They then began to tickle her and chase her towards the swimming pool.

Thandie threw Liz into the pool and dived in after her. As they playfully dunked each other under the water Rosamund stopped at the poolside and said “I’m always up for water sports with Thandie” adding “If you take it off, it stays off”. She removed her bikini top, wiggled her boobs at the camera and did a running depth charge into the pool.

They cut back to the girls in the studio. “Join us for more messy fun after the break” a laughing Katie said.

“Welcome back to the final part of Totty. Before I chat to Dani Dyer. Let’s hook up with our X-Rated version of the Golden Girls Thandie, Roz and Liz” Amber said. They cut back to the three topless ladies who were now stood by a hot tub. “No sagging here” said Rosamund pushing her boobs up. “Best £5,000 you ever spent” Thandie joked. “Cheeky cow” Rosamund replied and pushed Thandie head first in the hot tub. Thandie screamed and the camera panned down to see her emerging from below the surface of a chocolate sauce filled hot tub. Liz put out her hand to help Thandie out but Rosamund pulled Liz’s bikini bottoms down exposing her peachy bum as Thandie pulled her into the hot tub. Rosamund was laughing at Liz as she emerged from below the chocolate sauce totally covered. However Liz reached up and pulled Rosamund in head first. Rosamund emerged laughing from below the chocolate sauce also totally covered.

The three ladies settled down in the hot rub with their boobs visible above the chocolate sauce but covered in the substance. “I bet this is a better coverage than you had in The Royals?” Rosamund asked “Yes I spent several hours covered and having bits touched up on me” Liz admitted laughing. “I guess you like having your bits touched up?” Thandie asked and disappeared below the chocolate sauce. Suddenly Liz screamed “Not up there” laughing. Thandie appeared from under the chocolate sauce smirking. “What did you do?” Rosamund asked. “She stuck a finger up my bum Roz” Liz replied literally crying with laughter. “I thought that was your fanny” Thandie replied. “Wrong hole” Liz replied. “Well it didn’t feel tight enough for a bumhole” Thandie suggested. “Elizabeth Hurley do you enjoy it up there. You naughty English Rose?” Rosamund asked. “A lady never tells” Liz replied. “Well that means you can tell us” Thandie teased. “Let’s just say I’ve explored and been explored” Liz responded winking at the camera.

Suddenly Rosamund disappeared under the chocolate sauce and Thandie started giggling and struggling. She too disappeared beneath the sauce and eventually Rosamund emerged holding Thandie’s bikini briefs in her teeth. Liz then pushed Rosamund back under the chocolate sauce and there was lots of thrashing and flailing limbs and eventually Liz and Thandie emerged with Rosamund’s bikini bottoms. Rosamund then emerged from under the sauce and dunked the other two ladies back under it. All three then did a handstand in the sauce nominally flashing their bums although with them covered in sauce you couldn’t really see anything.

The three finally settled back down in the sauce and handed back to the studio. “Was that fun enough for you?” Thandie asked. “Yes you ladies are crazy” Katie replied. “I hope you’ve got some fun guests lined up to appear in the hot tub?” Maisie asked. “Yes next week we have got model and Instagram star Paris Dylan who is the girlfriend of legendary singer Don McLean. No doubt she’ll be up for getting an American Pie or two in the face. She has told us, she is looking forward to a fun time” Rosamund replied. “Then we have Naomi Harris and hopefully Emily Blunt joining us plus we are speaking to Halle Berry and Evan Rachel Wood too. We are using our contacts to actively sound out a lot of our celeb friends to see which of the ladies will be game to be naughty and get messy” Rosamund added.

“Thanks very much to Thandie, Rosamund and their guest Liz Hurley. Now I’m going to chat to Dani Dyer” Amber said as she walked over to a couple of sun loungers. Dani was already lay on one. “Would you like a drink?” Amber asked Dani. “Yes please” Dani replied. Amber clicked her fingers and the Phantom walked on this a menu. Amber looked at it and menu and pointed to one and then handed it to Dani who said “I’ll have the same please”. “Did you have fun doing the Nativity play on tour and then working with your dad when it transferred to London?” Amber asked. “Yes it was a lot of fun and working with Dad was something I’ve always wanted to do” Dani replied. The Phantom returned with a try containing two jugs of custard. He emptied the first over Amber’s head and the second over Dani’s head. “The service has gone down around here” Amber said.

The sound of a flock of seagulls flying overhead was heard and a load of white sauce was dumped on the two girls as they laughed. “I think I’m going to go topless” Amber said taking her bikini top off and letting her dark succulent large breasts bounce free, “I think I’ll join you” said Dani pulling the bow on her tie bikini top and letting her smaller pert breasts to fall free.”What do you think of my thrupennies?” Dani asked laughing. “Not as big as mine” Amber said pushing hers up. “What do you think gives the best suntan?” Dani asked. “This” said Amber picking up a bucket of oxtail soup and emptying it down Dani’s body from her head to her toes. Laughing profusely Dani rubbed it energetically into her boobs and belly.

“I fancy a starter” Dani said wiping her eyes clear. “Waitress” Amber shouted and Cher Lloyd in her naughty t-shirt and thong walked on with a menu. Dani looked at the menu and said “I’ll have tomato soup please”. Cher walked off and returned with a bucket of tomato soup and put it down on the floor next to Dani’s sun lounger. Dani looked into the bucket and said “There is a fly in there waitress”. “I can’t see one” Cher replied. “Take a closer look” Dani snapped. Suddenly Dani and Amber picked Cher up and turned her upside down and dunked her head into the soup. This had clearly been spontaneous as Cher was taken by surprise and screamed and coughed as her head was repeatedly dunked in the bucket. Even worse her t-shirt fell loose and down over her head exposing her small breasts. Amber and Dani lifted her up higher to allow the t-shirt to fall off completely. “I fucking hate you” Cher said rather humiliated but sportingly laughing.

Amber and Dani dunked her head back into the soup and then sat her up with the bucket on her head. “Leave it on. We had this planned if you had been a cow. But we reckon you can take it. Are you game” Amber whispered to Cher who gave a thumbs up. “That waitress reminds me of Cher Lloyd” Dani said. “That scary devil child who was on the X-Factor” Amber replied. Cher’s body could be seen rippling with laughter. “Yes, she has had a kid now, I expect she was got really saggy, flat tits” Amber added. Cher sat there with the bucket on her head with it between her legs crying with laughter. “My Dad said he’d have given her arse a good old East End spanking if she had been his daughter” Dani added. She picked up Cher and put her across her knee and gave her a hard smack on both cheeks. “Waiter” Dani shouted and the Phantom walked on carrying two custard pies and Dani pointed to Cher’s bum cheeks and the Phantom smacked a pie onto each.

“Waitress can we see the sweet trolley please?” Amber asked and Ella Henderson wheeled on a trolley full of cream cakes. “Can I try that one?” Amber said pointing to one cake. Ella picked it up and stuck it in Amber’s face. “Anything you recommend?” Amber asked wiping the cream out of her eyes. “This one” said Ella jumping onto the trolley and sitting her creamy thong covered bum splat onto a cake. “The large one on the bottom shelf. Can you put it on the floor please?” Dani asked. Ella obliged and Dani sat Cher down splat in the cake. “Those boobs look just like how I’d imagine Cher’s would look. A bit withered and droopy” Amber said. Cher still had the bucket on her head but could be heard laughing loudly. “I want a bigger cake” Amber announced and Maisie and Lauren came on carrying a giant custard pie.

Typically Maisie dropped it and fell face first into it. She grabbed Lauren and pulled her into it and started sticking the shaving foam down her knickers. They pulled Dani into the mess and all three rolled about in it. Amber then lifted the bucket off Cher’s head and said “Please read that line”. Laughing Cher read “Perf as a Smurf” but a deliberate fault made the line repeat several times. The girls formed a human chain as Amber dumped half a dozen buckets of blue slime over a screaming Cher.

“It’s Perf with Surf” Dani said and a load of muddy water cascaded onto her totally covering and destroying her. Amber helped Cher up and hugged her. “You were a great sport Cher” she said. “When you fucking turned me upside down and dunked me in that soup exposing my tits that was a shock. Plus you were a pair of evil cows about me and my arse is still throbbing. But it was wonderfully cruel and funny” Cher replied laughing as the audience cheered her.

“Can we say a huge thank you again to Ella Henderson, Lauren Platt, Cher Lloyd and Dani Dyer” Maisie said as Katie walked back on. Suddenly the Phantom appeared behind Katie and gave her his famous double pie sandwich. He looked at Cher screamed but then turned round and hugged her. “Join us next week when we will be joined by Maura Higgins, Holly Hamilton, Sally Bundock, BBC Correspondent Emma Vardy will be impressing Maisie in Maisie is Amazed and our special guest is Michelle Keegan. Thandie and Roz will be chatting to Paris Dylan. Coming up in future weeks we also have Cleo Demetriou and the So Awkward Girls, Katarina Johnson-Thompson, Amy Leigh Hickman, Harpz Kaur, a couple of soap star specials plus Johanna Konta who was on the Tiswas/OTT revival will be paying us a visit” A breathless Amber said. “Say goodnight Maisie” Katie said. “Goodnight Maisie” Maisie replied and got another pie from Katie as the show ended.

Any other girls you would like to see guesting on this show. I’m looking to do about 8 episodes in this series. The more original the suggestion the more likely I’ll use them. I’ve got a few request lists of girls people would like to see featured which I’ve included some of above for future episodes so I’m trying to work through these by cherry picking ladies who may have good story potential.

I tend to try to stay away from the very familiar names but I’ve had a number of people suggest Michelle Keegan so I’ve decided to feature her in the next episode to do something different from my normal slightly different choices.

Imperfections part 7: Flourishing

$
0
0

(Heya, Dani here, sorry this took actual years to update lol. Parts 1-6 can be found at this link here if you’re new to the series and need to get caught up: ~ )

They were walking towards the studio doors, hand in hand. Most often, Ian was a wonderful fiance. He was very affectionate, even though Victoria wasn’t always good at reciprocating such affection. But holding hands was nice. The way his thumb gently caressed hers as their hands remained attached, the way he would occasionally give her a soft smile… it all lowered her guard. Once at the doors, Ian pulled her hand towards him as if to give her a kiss, before using it to lightly but swiftly launch her to the ground.

The high heeled brunette screamed as she suddenly went down, though soon mud broke her fall. It was thick and a bit deep. Her whole side was dipped into the mud, while splatters of it now rested on her face and hair.

“Ian!” she gasped, trying to sit up. However when she did, she was met with Ian’s hand rubbing mud in her face. He slathered it on thickly. A small yell of disgust emitted from her lips. A smirk was on Ian’s. “What are you doing?”

“Told you I’d get you when you least expected it.”

He always needed to make a point, didn’t he? The both of them were prideful, yes, but Ian was the one who was always stubborn and headstrong.

Victoria growled. “Ian, I have to be on set in less than thirty minutes.”

“That’s plenty of time.” he insisted before crouching down to Victoria’s level in the mud. He smiled at her, though when she was trying to wipe some of the mud off her face, he snuck another handful. Then he promptly applied it to the top of her head.

Victoria squealed, huffing in protest. “Ian!” she snapped. “How even… it didn’t even rain today.” She was cringing as she felt the mud squelch under her with every movement.

“Oh I know. I had someone dig this up, fill it with wet, fresh mud just for you.” Ian stated a bit cockily. “You look nice covered head to toe like this.”

Pouting angrily, she huffed again. “Was me test riding in that awful spinner last week not enough?”

“Hm… no.” Ian chuckled. “Besides, look at how cute and huffy you are.”

“Hmph.” Victoria raised herself to her knees and grabbed Ian’s hands. “Help me up. I need to shower now before the show.”

He helped her to her feet with ease. “Of course.” Ian smiled and began walking to the entrance.

“Ah, ah no. No, we are going through the back.” Victoria insisted.

“Sure.” he chuckled.

Her clothes heavy with mud, Victoria trudged towards the back entryway with dread.

Once inside, she immediately threw herself into her dressing room’s shower, being careful to avoid being seen. It took quite a bit of time to get completely clean, so by the time she finished showering, Victoria only had enough time to throw on a dress and a pair of high heels before running out to be on stage. It wasn’t like her to go out without a full face of makeup, only wearing mascara, and her hair simply in a ponytail. She usually spent at the very least an hour getting ready, which she had been before arriving at the studio. Until, that is, Ian decided it had to be this moment he would surprise her.

Ian had been on stage warming the crowd since Victoria was five minutes late. He looked at her in a mock shocked look, as though he had expected her to take much longer getting ready despite the fact that they were supposed to start already.

“Victoria, what a lovely surprise, we were just expecting you.” he spoke with a chuckle. “Being late to your own show on the second episode…not very punctual, hm?”

That got a laugh out of the audience.

“Plus, your hair’s all wet.”

“It was raining.” Victoria blurted out.

“It didn’t rain today.” Ian reminded her.

Victoria’s composure remained, though she was giving Ian an icy glare. “Well it was raining on my side of town. Now give me my microphone, this is my show, not the Ian and Victoria Improv Comedy Hour.” With that she snatched the microphone off his lapel and attached it to the front of her dress. Ian’s design, the microphone was so tiny that you could really only see them if you got up close, but the way it picked up sound was incredible. Any guests on the show were temporarily given their own so that they could be heard just as perfectly. High grade and waterproof too, of course Ian would want it designed to withstand any mess it might encounter.

“Alright, now with my fiance shoved off to the side for a moment,” she spoke, before looking at Ian who practically shoved himself off with how fast he trotted backstage. “The show can finally begin. We’ll have to rush a bit since we’ve already lost five minutes. I’m Victoria Radcliffe, you’re watching Cold as Ice, and let’s just bring our first round of contestants onto the show.”

A spotlight came down, and standing there were two women, one older and one younger. Both looked incredibly presentable and wealthy, wearing designer clothing, jewelry, even hair accessories.

“First we have our nominator, Rachel Braxton, age 23, who has decided to nominate her aunt.” Victoria spoke as the spotlight more focused on Rachel. Blonde hair, blue eyes, tall, looking like a runway model, especially with how she was dressed.

“Then we have our nominee, the aunt in question,” she continued as the spotlight shifted again. “Elaine Braxton, age 45, who seems quite angry to be here.” Victoria’s lips curved into a smile.

“Well I am angry.” Elaine interjected. She was blonde too, but with much more of a stern, mature look. She was hardened and still rather attractive aesthetically, though not very much personality wise, it seemed. “This is absolute nonsense. This show, this whole concept, the fact that I would be nominated. It’s all barbaric. Everything from my bratty niece’s mouth is all a lie–”

“Sorry to see you feel that way, but pipe down for now, you’ll get the chance to make your defense.” Victoria interrupted. “So now is when we sit them down, get to know them and I as the judge will decide who will be our first guilty victim.”

Off stage, Ian thought of that name: Braxton. He knew some Braxtons, or rather, Victoria did. Thinking about it, he remembered that it was a Braxton who threw some ball every year that Victoria would speak of, but was never invited to, despite her parents being old friends with the family.

Once they were sat in chairs on either side, Victoria sat down in the middle seat and began her questioning. She crossed one leg over the other before addressing Rachel.

“Tell me why you nominated your aunt.” she spoke.

“Because she’s a bitch, plain and simple.” Rachel spoke in a posh accent such as her aunt’s.

“That is outrageous.” Elaine retorted with aggravation. “This is absolutely absurd.”

“Really, you talking down to the servants and mocking them isn’t being a huge bitch?” Rachel retorted. “You torment poor Jessica especially, always insulting her clothes, saying how poor her breeding is; it’s just awful.”

“Well, I think we have our first contestant then.” Victoria decided. “I don’t need to question you further; anyone who would say such things is absolutely deserving of punishment.”

“But you said I would get a chance to defend myself!” Elaine tried saying though was quickly interrupted.

“Ah ah ah, none of that.” Victoria spoke sharply and without empathy. “I can change my mind whenever I see fit. Bella, take Mrs. Braxton away while we decide who will be joining her.”

The intern moved forward, quickly grasping the woman. Elaine struggled a bit as she was walked over and placed in a pillory in the middle of set, the decided holding method for victims as they awaited punishment.

“Our next nominator and nominee are sisters.” she spoke as Rachel was ushered off to the side. “I’m told they have something of a feud as of late, always bickering, never quite seeing eye to eye. A common tale, but let’s see who will come out on top, and who will end up in slop.”

With her speaking, the sisters had enough time to walk out onto set where a spotlight was cast on one of them.

“First we have our nominator, Kathleen Barringer, age 20.” Victoria introduced. She was a rather tall redhead, sharp green eyes, paired with olive toned skin. The red hair wasn’t a natural red; it was far too bright and vivid and clearly from a bottle. “You’ve decided to nominate your older sister, is that correct?”

“Yes.” Kathleen answered.

“Then let us introduce that older sister, Sasha Barringer, age 26. Sasha, what are your thoughts on being nominated?”

“I’m convinced you’ll see that I’m not the one who should be in the hotseat.” The brunette insisted. “Kathy’s a little twit who thinks she can get away with this as a prank.”

“Well, we’ll see about that.” Victoria commented. “Both of you, take your seats.”

As they walked over, Victoria took a moment to examine them for a moment. They both clearly were sisters with the disdain they held for each other, the glaring even while walking to sit down.

“Now, what’s caused this little rift between the two of you?”

“One thing is that she’s always stealing from me.” Sasha claimed. “Every day, something’s missing from my room and I always find it in Kathy’s.”

“I don’t steal, I borrow.” Kathleen scoffed. “Learn the difference, slag.”

“Slag?” Victoria repeated, raising a brow. “Now that’s an interesting thing to refer to your sister as; why?”

“She stole my boyfriend; that’s why.” the redhead huffed, glaring over her shoulder at Sasha.

“I did not. He was never your boyfriend, he was interested in me from the beginning– just because you liked him, didn’t make him yours.” Sasha argued. “Ma’am, clearly my sister is delusional.” she spoke addressing Victoria then.

“I’ll be the judge of that.” she spoke. “So, Kathleen, is this the reason you’ve nominated your sister?”

“Yeah, she’s a backstabbing whore.” Kathleen responded with another look over her shoulder.

“Well, Sasha, what do you say in your defense?” Victoria spoke softly, glancing over to her.

“Thomas was never Kathy’s boyfriend. He was a boy from uni, which Kathy doesn’t attend, who fancied me. I went on a date with him, one date, and ever since then my sister’s been an absolute nightmare.”

“Hm. Interesting.” Victoria murmured. “And Kathleen, what do you say in response?”

“Thomas and I were practically dating. We were flirting all the time, he wanted to go out with me, but then Sasha decided she wanted him for herself.” she spoke, her scowl becoming more intense.

“So you admit then that Thomas wasn’t your boyfriend?” Victoria countered.

Kathleen’s face fell then. It softened, went pale, her eyes going wide. “No, but like I said, he was going to–”

“That doesn’t matter.” Victoria spoke matter-of-factly. “As Sasha expressed, she and Thomas went to school together, he had an interest in her, not you. And even if he didn’t, you’re not entitled to a man you’re not even dating.” she informed. “And besides… Sasha seems to be a lot more respectful than you are, so I’m more inclined to believe that she’s the one telling the truth. So that only brings me to my next logical conclusion–”

“No.. no…” Kathleen gasped.

“It looks like we have our first nominator becoming the nominee.” Victoria continued, her lips forming into a soft smirk. “Only on the second episode, and we already have someone like you. How fun.”

“No, no, no, no…” Kathleen whined as Bella took her by the arm and began dragging her to the stocks along with Elaine.

“Well, we have our first two victims. Elaine, a classist, snobby aunt, and Kathleen, a misguided, arrogant little sister, our first nominator turned nominee.” Victoria stood to her feet then, approaching the pillory to gaze down at the young woman. “You see, Kathleen, up until you, people who were nominated were so awful that even if the nominator themselves were definitely deserving of punishment, their nominee was far worse. You made the mistake of choosing your rather calm, rational older sister.”

Kathleen was squirming, next to Elaine who was simply glaring at the floor.

“Well, let us begin.” Victoria spoke with a widened grin. “Becky, Bella, the supplies.” she called out. The interns soon wheeled out carts of the infamous frosting pies, along with a giant bucket of paint on its own cart. “Now we’re going to start with a little game. Since you’re the first of something, Kathleen, I’m going to give you first choice. For this choice, you’ll be choosing for yourself and for Elaine. Which would you rather give to Elaine, the pies of that giant paint bucket? Keep in mind, whatever you don’t give her will go to you.”

Kathleen looked up from her bent over position in the pillory, taking a good look at both of them. The paint would be a full submerging, paint in every crevice, but it would also be relatively quick. The pies on the other hand would be slow and thick.

“I’ll give Elaine the pies.” she decided.

“Well, interns, get Elaine and Kathleen into more favorable positions.”

As Elaine was moved out of the pillory and moved to a chair, having her hands promptly tied behind her back, the same was done for Kathleen, only she was brought over to the giant bucket of paint. It was probably big enough to fit three people. It was purple paint, looking thick and glossy. Imagining how it would slip into every inch of her, the redhead cringed.

“I’ll start with you, Kathleen. Since this is a rather large bucket, I think we’ll need some extra equipment.” With that cue, a rolling staircase was wheeled out. Bella dragged the woman over to it, Victoria following. With the intern stepping out of the way, Victoria stepped behind the tied redhead. “Get moving.” she spoke softly, yet her tone was malicious. It was enough to give Kathleen chills, and she quickly began moving. Once she was to the top of the stairs, Victoria moved up a few steps with her. “I hope you like purple, because I have a feeling you and your outfit are going to be dyed with it.”

After saying this, she gave a hard shove to Kathleen’s back, pushing her into the paint. Falling into the vat like container, Kathleen screamed, though fell silent at submerging in the paint. Rising up to the surface, the girl whimpered, every inch of her shiny and purple.

“We’ll keep you there for a while, at least until we’ve given Elaine all her pies.”

“You can’t just leave me in here!” Kathleen whined.

“Of course I can.” Victoria stated, walking down the stairs and back over to center stage where Elaine was being held. She picked up one of the hefty pies, filled with chocolate pudding and topped with thick cake frosting.

“This is a disgrace to culture.” Elaine scoffed. “A woman of your status lowering herself to this travesty should be ashamed.”

Victoria simply chuckled, holding the pie in her hand like a charged weapon. “You say that, yet I’m sure you’ll be the one feeling shame in a few moments.” She plopped the pie into Elaine’s face, taking a moment to really smear it around. Elaine made muffled sounds of disgust, struggling as the pie was rubbed firmly into her features.

After that, Becky and Bella began slamming pies onto her as well, going in on the sides, on top of her head, while Victoria covered her face and the front of her rather stylish dress. She grabbed one and was sure to really rub it into her hair, roughly swiping it from side to side. Elaine was gasping in horror as pies pelted her from all angles, trapped in an endless barrage of them.

By the time it was finally over, Elaine was a huge, multicolored blob of frosting, chocolate, custard and cherry filling. The woman was still gasping dramatically at her torture, which wasn’t over yet despite having no more pies left.

Kathleen, who spent the whole time still tied up and soaking in paint, was pouting and quietly making sounds of distress.

“And the game continues.” Victoria spoke. While the pies had been covering Elaine, more interns had brought out a machine that had two high hanging nozzles connected to large containers of mystery substances. “Elaine, it’s your turn to choose.”

“I won’t play this game.” Elaine huffed through the thick layer of frosting covering her lips, a bit of it being blown away by her huffing.

“Won’t play along? Well, that just won’t do, will it?” Victoria asked, turning to the audience who gave a resounding; “No!”

“Are you sure? There will be consequences.” Elaine remained silent, which gave Victoria her answer. “Since you won’t play along, I suppose I’ll just have to punish you even worse than I intended to. Kathleen, will you play along?”

“Yes, ma’am.” Kathleen quickly spoke, having gained some fear of Victoria.

“Good. You have three choices this time, you can give one of them to Elaine and the two choices that remain, you will receive one of them, but you won’t know which.” she explained. “Your choices are: honey, soy sauce, and oatmeal. Which will you give to Elaine?”

“Um…” Soy sauce would be so bad, she thought to herself. But so would honey with how sticky it was. But there was a chance she would get oatmeal instead. “I’ll give her soy sauce.”

Elaine cringed at hearing it. Bella and Becky each went to grab one of them, bringing them both over to the machine, getting covered in what they were in the process, which was the point; it prevented Victoria from getting anything on her. While Ian did frequently cover her in mess, Victoria hated it, and especially preferred for it to not happen outside of Ian’s wishes.

They were both stood under a nozzle while the stage tech crew calibrated Elaine’s to have soy sauce. While they were setting it up, Victoria spoke to Kathleen again.

“So, what are you hoping for, oatmeal or honey?” she asked.

“Oatmeal, definitely. I already have paint in my hair, if honey gets in it, it’ll never get clean.”

“Good to know.” Victoria spoke, giving a glance to the audience, a little glimmer in her eye. The tech crew responded to the answer. One of them gave the signal before walking offstage and she gave a smile. “Give them a good countdown, 3,”

“2,” the audience began counting with her. “1!”

With that, soy sauce began pouring over Elaine’s head and honey began pouring over Kathleen’s.

“Ugh!” Elaine cried out, practically gagging at how strong the smell was. The oily consistency pouring over the frosting was a horrible mixture. She felt slimy and gross. Kathleen felt a similar disgust, only with her it was the gooey stickiness that cascaded down her face, glopping down her eyelashes, sticking her lips together as she whimpered. Victoria had a nice, gentle laugh at their misfortune.

“Here is where our program changes a bit.” she informed the audience. “This next step would’ve been the end for both of them and it will be the end for Kathleen, but we have more to torture Elaine with for her daring defiance. For now, let’s focus on Kathleen.” she spoke, turning to the purple woman. “Now that you’re all sticky, we must find something to stick to it. I can’t have you choose for yourself and since Elaine won’t play along; audience, I want to hear some numbers between one and three. One is for feathers, two is for flour, and three is for glitter. Go.”

There were some twos, some threes, but the loudest anyone could hear was ones, many ones.

“Feathers it is.” Victoria declared after a moment. Becky dragged out a bag of feathers, which she brought to her. With a laugh, Victoria ripped it open and began pouring them over Kathleen, mocking her as she did. “Aren’t you the perfect little purple chicken.” she chuckled. “Cluck for me and maybe I’ll stop.”

Victoria laughed again as Kathleen actually began clucking in hopes that she would. Of course, she didn’t, and continued to cover every inch of her she could with the feathers. A beak on a string was given to Victoria, who carefully slid it over Kathleen’s head, placing the beak onto her mouth.

“You look perfect.” Victoria taunted through the laughs of the audience. The whimpering Kathleen looked so embarrassed, her face would likely be seen as bright red if not for being covered in purple. “And now we move on to our favorite victim.” Victoria joked as she turned to Elaine. “I have a plan of what to do with you. Let’s stick with the theme of farm animals. Becky, Bella, bring out the flour, as well as pink feathers, and pink glitter. Oh, and bring me the largest amount of glue you can find.” she instructed.

Becky went to get the flour while Bella went to get the other things. While they waited on those, the flour was brought to Victoria, who grinned eagerly at Elaine. She moved forward to her, not close enough to where she was touching, but almost, and right next to her ear.

“You’ve always looked down on me, especially that night…” Victoria murmured so quietly, her whisper too quiet for their microphones. “Looking down on you will be so satisfying.”

Before Elaine could say anything, the bag of flour was given to Victoria. She was quick to take a handful of flour and throw it in Elaine’s face. Cringing and tightly closing her eyes, she proceeded to get the bag of flour poured over her head, mixing with the soy sauce for just an absolutely awful grimy texture. Victoria didn’t stop until all of the flour was coating Elaine.

Bella came back with a cart full of bags of pink feathers, pink glitter, and a few tubs of glue. Victoria was gleeful at the sight.

Ian, watching from backstage, was pleased by this, not really by watching women besides Victoria get messy, but watching her light up, watching her be delighted and full of emotion. He was so used to her always being so composed and stoic. The show really allowed her to become more confident and flourish, while intensifying her “cold” persona at the same time in certain parts of the show, but in a way that was fun for her.

“With you coated in flour, the next obvious choice is to get you coated in glue. I want all those feathers and glitter to stick. While we do this, I’m going to have another element prepared, but I’ll leave it a surprise.” She leaned towards Bella, whispering in her ear what she wanted. She nodded to Becky and the two interns walked offstage.

As they did, Victoria opened and raised a large container of glue and began pouring it over her face first, before pulling it back to the center of her head. Elaine made unintelligible glug sounds as glue rushed over her face, blind and helpless. Her entire head soon became covered in the sticky substance and when it did, Victoria began pouring it over her body. She tried getting it everywhere, including down the back of her dress. With careful fingers touching the floury parts of the dress, Victoria lifted up the skirt of the woman’s dress and began pouring glue down the back of her panties as well. A muffled shriek escaped Elaine, followed by a rather distraught sound.

Circling Elaine, Victoria ripped open the bag of feathers, really taking her time with them. She wanted to evenly coat the woman’s body with them, including shoving a wad of feathers into Elaine’s panties. All the while, Kathleen remained next to them in her tied up, humiliated state. No one was coming for her any time soon.

Next was the glitter and that part was easy. The pink glitter got everywhere, including sticking to Kathleen, though that was only a bit of spray. It fully coated Elaine, not a single sliver of her not covered in the shimmery pink glitter. By now, everything Victoria mentioned as “the surprise” was being brought on stage. There was a kiddie pool full of mud, more rope, and an apple.

Bella and Becky moved Elaine again, over to the pool. It was Victoria, however, who pushed her into it. A slight scream escaped the woman as she fell, soon landing face first in the gloopy mud.

“In case you can’t tell by everything covering your eyes,” Victoria taunted. “You’re wallowing in mud. Bella, do it now.” Using the extra rope, Bella began hogtying Elaine. When the woman lifted her head, Victoria placed her foot on the back of Elaine’s head to force her face back into the mud. When she did, a guttural moan of anguish escaped the woman.

When she was fully hogtied, Victoria crouched down gracefully, grabbing the apple. She held Elaine’s nose so she’d be forced to open her mouth, and as soon as it was open Victoria shoved the apple into it. A sound that perhaps was a cry escaped Elaine, which was music to Victoria’s ears.

Victoria was pleased to see the haughty woman well broken and degraded. “Look at you, the high and mighty, now in the mud just like a pig. I say it’s where you rightfully belong, Elaine, wouldn’t you all agree?” she addressed the laughing audience, who began applauding in agreement. “And to think we have two more nominees to punish. While we do that, we’ll free the well punished Kathleen and I think Elaine here will be nice and cozy staying in her mud for the remainder of the show.”

 

 

Battle of the Decades 2.0 – Round 1

$
0
0

Cheryl waited excitedly backstage. She couldn’t quite believe she’d got this gig. She had watched the first series, and seen her band mate Kimberley Walsh appear on Cakey Skate, and knew it had been a huge success. She knew that there was a very good chance she might get messy, but that was ok, after all, she had got messy before. As she prepared to open the show, a producer handed her a sheet of paper revealing to her the line up for the game of Push Off, as well as her guest co-host for the round. She knew that this was going to be great fun. Suddenly it was time for the show.

The doors on to the stage opened and the crowd went wild as Cheryl emerged. She was wearing a sparkly top, which revealed her cleavage, and had her long hair down.

A8D3BF81-2F1F-4B99-AA6E-AAC349470A04

“Good evening, and welcome to the second Battle of the Decades, I’m Cheryl. And I’m delighted to be here”.

The crowd cheered, as Cheryl made her way over to a sofa on the side of the stage.

“Now, we are back by popular demand, and last time out, the 2000s came out on top as Holly Willoughby sent Arielle Free splashing into the gunk dunk, and was crowned our first ever Queen of Gunge”. A short montage of the series one final was played.

“This time, we asked our viewers which gungings from the last two decades were their absolute favourites, and two clear winners were identified, so without further ado, let’s meet our season 2.0 contenders” (author’s note – credit to Yowiewowie for running these votes).

“First up, and in the yellow corner, representing the 2000s, we have former Hear’Say star Myleene Klass”.

Myleene walked out on stage. She was wearing a tight fitting yellow dress.

BB4C1141-F837-4662-8634-50E0FCB400BF

“And secondly, in the green corner, representing the 2010s, we have Pussycat Dolls star Kimberly Wyatt”.

Kimberly walked out on stage, from the opposite side to Myleene, she was wearing a short sparkly green dress.
11EBCC5B-85A6-47B8-B50E-2CC00AE778C2

Both ladies took a seat with Cheryl on the sofa.

“Welcome to the show ladies, how are you both feeling?”

Myleene started, “well Cheryl, it’s been a good few years since I was gunged, but I’m honoured that it’s so fondly remembered and looking forward to taking part, and defending the crown for the 2000s”.

Kimberly was next, “I’m looking forward to it. I loved getting slimed on CBBC and I’m glad people enjoyed it. I really wanna win and I’m looking forward to playing some fun games”.

“Well ladies”, said Cheryl, “there are indeed some fun games to play, we start tonight with Push Off, from the 2010s, and from Saturday Mash Up, where Kimberly was gunged”.

The crowd cheered, Cheryl continued, “we then move onto the 2000s and our version of Stop The Snot, as Myleene revisits the famous gunge tank”. Another cheer went up.

“Finally, we play a brand new game, which we hope you will all be able to enjoy, before our two ladies are sat above the Gunk Dunk in our classic finale”. Both Myleene and Kimberly smiled nervously as the crowd responded to an image of the famous gunk dunk on the screen.

“So, one of our ladies will be crowned the second Queen of the Gunge, and one will end up in there!”, said Cheryl, “but first, we need to play round one, this is Push Off!”

The Push Off graphics were played, and when the show resumed, Cheryl was stood at the end of a corridor, with Myleene and Kimberly.

“Hi, and welcome to our version of push off. Now we have Myleene and Kimberly here but as with our first series, game one is a team game so Myleene would you like to introduce your team please?”

“Sure, please welcome, two other ladies who experienced a gunging in the 2000s, it’s Sammy Winward and Zoe Salmon”. Both ladies walked into the corridor, wearing yellow and stood alongside Myleene.

“And Kimberly, if you could introduce your team please?”

“Sure, I’ve got two stars who have both faced the Question Slime chair, please welcome Cleo Demetriou and Vick Hope”. Again, both ladies entered the corridor, and stood alongside their team captain.

“Right, we’ve got our teams, but I can’t host this game alone, so to help me out, please welcome the first ever Push Off champion, it’s Pixie Lott”. The camera panned to far end of the corridor wear Pixie was stood in front of a stack of toilet rolls, wearing a black and white striped dress. She waved and smiled cutely at the camera.

FA228770-9BB2-4238-8A37-04C2F2C5FD00

“Right, we’ve got everything we need”, Cheryl said, as she tapped on the handle of a shopping trolley, “so let’s get a quick recap of the rules”.

A short video played, voiced over by Scarlett Moffatt which explained the rules of the game. After each player had taken their turn, the teams’ total scores would be added up. And the team with the highest total will win, with the winning captain taking the point ahead of the final.

The shot cut back to Pixie, “and for the losing team, they’ll be getting some of this”. Pixie smashed a cream pie into the camera, as if to give viewers a point of view pieing. A different shot of Pixie showed her giggling, “oh I do love pieing people”, she said, “back to you Cheryl”.

“Thanks Pixie, right as this is the 2010s game, Kimberly, you get the choice of going first or second. What’ll it be?”

“We’ll go first, and set the score to beat”.

“Ok, now one last thing to mention is that the player who gets the lowest individual score faces an additional forfeit”, said Cheryl, as all six players looked nervously at one another.

The crowd gave an oooh noise, and the graphics flashed up once more as Kimberly’s team got ready to play.

Author’s note – the score have been generated at random.

First up was Cleo, she wore her long dark hair straight down her back, and was wearing a plain white top. She stepped up behind the trolley, before running up and giving it a from push. It skidded along the corridor and hit the toilet rolls at a reasonable pace. She looked relatively pleased with the effort. The camera panned to Pixie, who started counting.

While she did this a replay was shown of Cleo’s effort. As the replay ended, Cleo finished making her way up the corridor to meet up with Pixie and find out her score.

“Well it’s a solid start for Team 2010, Cleo scored 39”, Pixie announced to ripples of applause from the crowd, “back to you Cheryl”.

“Thanks Pixie. I’m here with Vick who is hoping to follow that up with a big score, how you feelin Vick?”

“Not confident, I was rubbish last time I played and ended up getting pied!”

Cheryl laughed, “right, let’s see how you get on this time, whenever you’re ready Vick”.

Vick braced herself, and prepared to take a run up with her trolley, she built up a fair bit of speed before letting go and sending the trolley whizzing towards the stack of toilet rolls. It hit at some speed and seemed to stop suddenly but perfectly in the centre of the stack. There looked to be a large quantity in the trolley.

The same process for Cleo’s push was followed, however this time, Pixie was still counting when the replay had ended. Eventually the count finished and Vick was revealed to have 103. This gave the team a running total of 142.

Kimberly would be next, it was at this point Cheryl revealed a twist. “Right, after Kimberly has had her turn, Pixie will count up her score, but it will not be revealed until the end, when both scores are confirmed”.

“Right I’m ready”, Kimberly said enthusiastically.

“Off you go”.

Kimberly almost sprinted up with her trolley and gave it quite a push, sending it at a slight angle down the corridor. Despite the angle, it still hit the loo rolls fairly centrally, and many were seen tumbling into the trolley.

A replay was shown and Pixie confirmed that she had finished counting.

“Are you feeling confident after that?” Cheryl asked.

“Well I know I got some in, so I think we’ve set a good score to beat, and Vick did amazing”.

“Right well we will find out later, for the time being, give it up for Team Kimberly”.

The blonde walked off, and Team Myleene walked into shot and joined Cheryl.

“So Myleene, Kimberly thinks you’ve got a tough score to beat, how do you think you’ll do?”

“We’re pretty confident aren’t we ladies?”. The other girls nodded.

“Right well Sammy is up first, so let’s see how this all ends”.

Sammy took hold of the trolley, she was determined not to get messy today, and knew that a high score would help reduce the chances. She ran up to the line and gave the trolley a firm push. It made a good contact and looked like it could be a very high score.

A replay was shown and Sammy made her way up to where Pixie was totting up her score. “Well Sammy, an excellent start for Team 2000s, you got 95!”.

Sammy looked delighted with this, as did Zoe, who was getting prepared on the start line.

As soon as she was given the command to go, she ran up and gave the trolley an almight shove. It hit the stack of rolls, but not centrally, she looked disappointed as she made her way up to Pixie. The replay confirmed that this was going to be a lower score.

“Oh Zoe, what can I say, you only managed to get 25, which means you have the lowest individual score so far, and you’re team are behind after two pushes”.

“Oh no, that’s terrible”, Zoe bemoaned.

“Right Myleene”, said Cheryl, as the camera panned back to the start line, “you need a good score here to avoid a defeat, how are you feeling?”

“A bit nervous, I don’t know how many I need but I think it’s quite a lot”.

“Well, whenever you’re ready, take it away, best of luck”.

Myleene went for a more casual jog, and tried to ensure she gave the trolley a straight push into the centre of the stack of toilet rolls. Sure enough, it hit centrally, and a cascade of toilet rolls fell inside it. Myleene couldn’t quite see how well she’d done but looked pleased with her effort.

A replay was shown and when the live footage returned, Cheryl was stood with the two team captains. Pixie had finished counting and was holding two boards.

“Ok, we have a result”, said Cheryl, “Pixie, could you do the honour please?”

“I certainly can Cheryl! After two efforts each, the scores were 142 to Team 2010 and 125 to Team 2000, meaning Myleene needs to outscore Kimberly by 18 or more toilet rolls”.

Both team captains still looked nervous.

“I can reveal that Kimberly scored 57, giving Team 2010 a final total of 199”.

The crowd applauded and Kimberly pumped the air with her first.

“Myleene, you need 75 or more. I can reveal, you scored…..32…..which means Kimberly takes the win!”

Myleene looked dejected, while Kimberly jumped up and down in celebration. The camera panned to the other four contestants, with Cleo and Vick pretending to rub pies in Sammy and Zoe’s faces.

“Ok, let’s get to the punishments”, said Cheryl, “can we have team 2000s join us here please?”

Sammy and Zoe made their way over to where the other ladies were standing, as Kimberly, Cheryl and Pixie each picked up two old fashioned bright yellow custard pies

The three girls were lined up, from left to right it was Sammy, then Zoe (who knew she still had worse to come), and finally Myleene.

Pixie went first, taking her two pies and giving Sammy the perfect pie sandwich, plastering Sammy’s face and long blonde hair in custard, laughing as she did it. Sammy looked less than impressed, and was particularly keen to try and remove the custard from her hair.

Cheryl went next, and planted her two pies into either side of Zoe Salmon’s face, again making sure he got some hair coverage too, smearing the pies around to ensure maximum coverage.

Finallly it was the captain’s turn. Kimberly opted for a different approach. She took the first pie and slapped it square into Myleene’s gorgeous face. She then lifted the second pie up and dropped it square on top of Myleene’s long brown hair.

The three members of Team 2000 were covered in the custardy substance, with only Myleene giggling, and her two team mates looking disgusted.

“That was amazing”, said Cheryl, “well done ladies, but it’s not quite over yet. Zoe, you got the lowest score so must face our losers forfeit!”

The crowd cheered as a Cheryl grabbed Zoe by the hand, and led her across the studio Zoe was struggling to see where she was going through all the custard already on her face. Eventually the pair stopped in front of what looked like a large toilet.

“Take a seat Zoe, make yourself comfortable pet”, Cheryl said.

CD56CC7C-F0B9-450A-AB16-C9D08495E8BAU
Still wiping remnants of custard from her face and struggling to see what was happening, Zoe fumbled her way onto the seat.

“Then whenever you’re ready Zoe, pull the chain”.

Zoe looked around and eventually spotted the chain hanging loose behind her right shoulder. Zoe grabbed hold of the chain with her right hand and braved herself for what was about to happen.

The audience counted down from three and Zoe yanked hard on the chain. This triggered some toilet like noises to be played, before a torrent of thick brown sludge like gunge splattered down on top of her. The Irish TV presenter yelped in disgust, as the other girls in the studio laughed hysterically. But were grateful that it didn’t happen to them.

The gunge stopped falling and the camera closed in on Zoe, whose long blonde locks were now coated in the ticket brown mess. She looked disgusted. She just sat there, not quite knowing what to do.

Cheryl tried to bring the show to a close but was struggling to do so as she continued to laugh at Zoe.

“Wow, what an opening to this second series of Battle of the Decades. A big thank you to all our guests for taking part in this special edition of Push Off, and to Pixie Lott for helping us out. I’ve been Cheryl, and thanks for watching”.

As she closed the show, Pixie walked over and stood next to her. The two singers were smiling and waving at the camera and hadn’t spotted Cleo and Vick behind the,, each with pie in hand. As the show concluded, Cleo slammed a pie into Cheryl’s face and Vick into Pixie’s. it was a great end to the show and the production crew looked delighted.

After the broadcast finished, the girls all made their way off stage. Kimberly was delighted to have taken an early lead. Myleene knew she had to win the second game to stand any sort of chance.

Cheryl, meanwhile, was delighted with the way the first show had gone, despite the pie in the face at the end. She couldn’t wait to see what happened in part two, and what surprises might be in store there

The Alternative Euro 2020: The Final – Part 1

$
0
0

Although this story mentions real persons, corporations, TV shows and places, it is purely a work of fiction for personal enjoyment. The story does NOT describe real events and should NOT be taken to accurately portray any real entity mentioned. In keeping with its fictional nature, the events and activities described in the story may not be legal, ethical or safe. This site does NOT endorse or recommend their enactment.

A fanfare of music filled the studio as the time struck 9pm and the final show of the Alternative Euro 2020 was about to air.

04E0E186-7DAE-4FBF-98F8-7C3C3E892E51

The stunning blonde host walked onto the stage and waved to the applauding audience. 9F7C232F-7F36-4483-B8AD-3D0709427147She was wearing a short yellow minidress and high heel shoes and without saying anything she clapped her hands and looked upwards towards a large TV monitor above her. It burst into life and started to play brief video highlight clips from the previous shows, showing multiple gungings of sports news reporters.

Once the clips ended, the blonde beauty faced the audience “Hello! My name is Rachel Riley and if you like what you have just seen, then you are definitely going to like tonight’s show! Yes, we have arrived at the Final stage of our little competition and we will see which sports news reporter has won.”

”Let’s bring out our two finalists now; it’s none other than Anna Woolhouse and Natalie Sawyer”

Both ladies are walked onto the stage, escorted by the 5 university students. As is usual with the shows contestants, they are attired in tight white t-shirts with their names emblazoned on the back, white bikini briefs with ties, and white high heel shoes.

The ladies are shown to two armchairs and are asked to sit down.

Rachel: “Please make yourselves comfortable ladies, while I ask the guys a few questions.”

The blonde turned to face the five guys who were aged between 19 and 21 years old.

“Now, you are all university students, so I expect you have played many messy pranks in your time. However, I want each of you to say (1) which of our two finalists you would like to get messy (2) the reason why and (3) if you had free reign how would you do it?”

The two ladies shifted uneasily in their seats as the students began to answer.

Student 1: “For me it has to be Anna. There’s nothing sexier than an older woman wearing glasses. If I had the chance, I would have her wearing black lingerie and then I would dunk her in a tank filled with honey”

Student 2: “I have to disagree as I would choose Natalie. I know she’s been on many of these types of shows before, but she’s a great target and I’ll never get tired of seeing her get messy. My dream messy experience for her, would be for her to go on a trip around a NHP style house and get absolutely trashed!”

Student 3: “I’m a guy of simple pleasures, so I would have to go for Natalie and a good old fashioned naked custard pieing”

Student 4: “I do like the sexy secretary look so my choice would be Anna and she would be wearing a tiny slingshot bikini and have to mud wrestle against a professional female wrestler.”

Student 5: “I’m a little tired of constantly seeing Natalie on these type of shows so I would also choose Anna for a bit of variety. Obviously she would be naked apart from a pair of high heel shoes and she would be tied to a post and have continuous buckets of gunge thrown over her.”

Rachel: “Wow! Those are some really humiliating sploshings. What do you think ladies?”

Natalie: “Hmmm! They have some very vivid imaginations and they’ve obviously watched too many CSWL shows!”

Anna; “I think they answered your questions far too enthusiastically for my liking!“

Looking towards the host, Anna continued “I wonder if they have any ideas for how to get you messy!”

Rachel blushed a little as out of the corner of her eye, she could see the students were about to speak out. However she had no real desire to give them a platform to say how they would like to mess her up, so she very quickly moved onto the next segment.

Rachel: “Moving swiftly on, we need to prepare our finalists for the announcement of the result.”

The blonde states at the comfy armchairs the two ladies are sitting on “Those seem far too luxurious and relaxing. Guys, can you take Anna and Natalie to something a bit more appropriate!”

The students obeyed and escorted both ladies to an area of the studio which had a curtain in front of it. They quickly pulled the curtain to one side to reveal two X-frames side by side. 735A5A30-2746-486C-9A95-1AA71A0A2EE0The ladies gulped as they knew what was going to happen next and they weren’t disappointed as they were stood with their backs against the frames and had their wrists and ankles secured at each end of the X. This left them in an uncompromising position with their arms and legs outstretched.

Rachel smiled “Ok ladies, I see that you are both ready! Haha!”

The studio lights dimmed and two spotlights focused on both ladies.

”I can tell you that there were 67 votes received from viewers, and one of you received 54% of the vote. And that person and the winner of the Alternative Euro 2020 is ………………. NATALIE!”

The full glare of the studio lights came back on and the theme tune of the show rang out as the audience applauded heartily. Rachel brought her microphone up to Natalie’s mouth “What do you have to say to all the viewers who voted for you?”

In a rather sarcastic tone, Natalie replied “Thank you so much”

Turning to the other X-Frame, Rachel commiserated with Anna, and told her that she would now receive her consolation prize. Stepping away from the X-Frame was a good move for Rachel, as the 5 students surrounded Anna, holding two large custard pies each.

A custard pie splattering frenzy followed which practically covered Anna from head to toe. Rachel walked to the side of the frame and pulled down on a lever. This activated the tank above Anna’s head and she was deluged with thick green gunge.

Releasing her from her bonds, one of the students helped her wipe her eyes before the sploshed sports reporter slowly walked off, waving to the audience as she went, and leaving a gungey trail behind her.

The camera focused back on Rachel.

Rachel: “Oops I almost forgot about our little viewer competition. There was one viewer who correctly predicted that Natalie would win  with a 54% majority, and their chosen lady celebrity to appear on the show is none other than Dame Jessica Ennis-Hill”

From the side, walks on Jessica in a sultry black dress and high heel shoes. 58ED4D4A-8844-483F-8098-6861DB380FC4

Rachel: “Hi Jessica, or should I say Dame Jessica.”

Jessica: “Jessica will be fine”

Rachel: “I don’t think we’ve had a Dame appear on these types of shows before, but I think you are about to find out what does happen to Dames when they do.”

Before Jessica could do anything else, she was scooped up by the university students in their arms and carried in the air towards a large vat. Once at the side of the vat, Jessica was lowered and held by her ankles and wrists, before she started to be swayed to and fro. The camera was quick to focus in on Jessica’s face as she was being swayed and it captured a resigned look.

The former athlete was duly thrown into the air and into the tank and splashed into the mucky contents. When she emerged from beneath the surface, she was coated in sticky black molasses. As she was coming to terms with her dunking, one of the students upended a black bin bag over her head, and feathers engulfed her and quickly stuck to the sticky gloop.

Rachel: “Ha! Hope you enjoyed our version of being tarred and feathered!”

Jessica: “If I’m being honest, not really!”

Rachel: “That’s the end of part 1. We’ll be back shortly to give Natalie her winners prize, after some messages from our sponsors….”

 

 

Totty Episode 2 Part 1 with Maura Higgins, Holly Hamilton, Sally Bundock, Paris Dylan, Emma Vardy and Michelle Keegan

$
0
0

Although this story mentions real persons, corporations, TV shows and places, it is purely a work of fiction for personal enjoyment. The story does NOT describe real events and should NOT be taken to accurately portray any real entity mentioned. In keeping with its fictional nature, the events and activities described in the story may not be legal, ethical or safe. This site does NOT endorse or recommend their enactment.This story will contain scenes of nudity and/or a sexual nature. 

“Welcome to the second Episode of Totty” said Amber Gill wearing a very sexy orange thong bikini. “Wow you are looking hot today Amber” said Maisie Smith in sweatpants and a cropped Nike top. “I’ve gone for the sporty look too” added Katie Thistleton in denim shorts and an Adidas vest top.

Amber, Maisie and Katie

“I can do this in my outfit” said Amber twerking her big juicy dark bum cheeks to the camera and dropping into a sexy slut drop. “I can beat” Maisie replied and lifted her top up to flash her large breasts as she was braless underneath as the audience cheered. “I may not be able to beat that but Phantom Flan Flinger” Katie shouted and the Phantom ran on and gave her a double pie sandwich in the face. “Phantom” Amber shouted and twerked at him and he gave her a double pie sandwich on her bum cheeks. “Phantom” shouted Maisie flashing her boobs again but this time the Phantom emptied a bucket of custard over her head. It ran down Maisie pinned up hair and down her face as she stood there still flashing her boobs. “What am I like” she giggled and slid into her signature splits still flashing her boobs. The Phantom then walked on a gave her a pie in the face.

“I always get the most” Maisie said laughing lowering her top and getting up. “That’s because you are so funny and why we all love you” Amber replied. “After last week’s naughty opening episode the viewing figures were good and I’d like to thank Cher Lloyd again for being such a top sport when we insulted her all night” Katie said. “This week we have got the star of Our Girl Michelle Keegan as our Special Guest and I can announce that next week’s Special Guest will be Maya Jama”. Amber said. “I haven’t seen Michelle yet today, we just send the girls an outline of what we may do and they agree to that or not and we work from there. We ask them to dress sexily be it shorts, lowcut dress, swimsuit, bikini and whatever else they flash is up to them” Katie added. “Well Michelle has tweeted she is deciding which bikini to wear and she hasn’t washed her hair for a few days as she knows she’ll get mucky” Maisie added.

“Also we’ll be linking up with Thandie and Rosamund talking to model and Instagram star Paris Dylan who is the girlfriend of legendary singer Don McLean. No doubt she’ll be up for getting an American Pie or two in the face. She has posted she is deciding what super sexy outfit to wear too” Katie said. “I’ll be hosting a new feature called Maisie I’m Amazed where BBC Correspondent Emma Vardy will show me a couple of her hidden talents” Maisie said. “But first welcome Love Island star Maura Higgins, BBC Sport’s Holly Hamilton and Sally Bundock from BBC Business Live” Amber said.

All three ladies walk on wearing bikinis.

The ladies hugged the presenters and admired each others outfits. “Wow Sal you have really squeezed into that bikini. Give her a huge cheer” Amber said. The audience cheered Sally who was clearly pleased to receive such a reaction. “If someone had told me just over 2 weeks ago, I’d be on here wearing a bikini and going to have some messy fun. I’d have said they were crazy” Sally replied. “Yes I hear you have become something of a sex symbol at 48 years old and are now modeling bikinis for ASOS and going to do a cheeky charity church calendar for 2021?” Katie asked. “Yes, it’s down to these two” said Sally pointing to Maura and Holly. “And these two” Maura replied wobbling Sally’s large boobs.

“Holly Hamilton, you look amazing” Maisie said and turned her around to show she was in a thong bikini with her pert bum cheeks on view. “I can twerk too” Holly said and did a joint twerk with Amber as the audience cheered. “Plus we hear that Maura gave you a shock gunging when you visited her in Ireland?” Katie asked. “Yes, it was a real shock and eye opener. Then we got Sally gunged and had it reported on BBC News” Holly added laughing. “Finally you Maura, we saw your feed into the Tiswas/OTT Charity show with your naughty headbanger” but now we finally get you in the studio Maisie asked laughing. “Yes I’m here and we are going to have some fun” Maura shouted.

“This is how it works we’ll play a game or a joint game involving all of you and the chances are you’ll all get rather mucky along with us” Katie said. “First to play is Holly. We read that you are always mistaken for Holly Willoughbooby” said Amber as Maisie again lifted her top to flash her boobs. “Well Holly entered gunging immortality on the Ministry of Mayhem especially with their Thank You Desk. So you’ll be reading out some stories as we dust off the Totty Tickler Time Desk” said Katie. “You sit and read for as long as you can and you can stop it by shouting Tiswas” Amber added. “Which of us three do you want to sit alongside you at the desk? Maisie asked. “I think it has to be you Maisie” Holly responded as the audience cheered.

Laughing Maisie led Holly over to a desk with two chairs situated behind it and gave Holly a laminated piece of paper. “Read for as long as you can” said Maisie said to Holly. “My name is Holly Willoughbooby, I was gunged many times on Ministry of Mayhem now I’m reading from the Totty Tickler Time Desk as Wind Machines, Water hoses, fire extinguishers and several buckets of gunge are turned on us” Holly said. Suddenly the deluge began. “You may think that MOM Thank You Desk was original but it all started with Tiswas Tickler Time” Holly continued as she and were soaked, covered in foam and nearly blown off their seat. “Now as I’m Holly Willoughbooby one of us must flash their boobs” Holly read and froze on the spot. “I’ll do it” Maisie yelled pulling her cropped top over her head and yelling. “If you take it off, it stays off” as her impressive boobs bounced free as the girls continued to be soaked with water and foam. Gasping for breath and wiping her laminate paper Holly continued “The girl who didn’t flash her boobs has agreed to be covered with 8 custard pies, two buckets of gravy, a bag of feathers and a bin full of porridge whilst the other girl gets the same!”. Gamely as they were hit with this onslaught by the other girls Maisie and Holly hugged each other, Maisie stuck her boobs in a squalling Holly’s face as the pies rained down on their heads and they were destroyed with the two buckets of gravy each. Their long hair plastered limply to their bodies. They screamed as the feathers were emptied on them and gasped as two huge bins of porridge were stuck on their heads. The wind machine and water hoses knocked Maura over and she pulled Sally down with her and there was much hilarity as they struggled to get up and kept slipping over again. Wiping her eyes and laminate clear Holly continued “We continue by sitting on two large cream cakes with our butt cheeks”. Amber and Katie ran on and stuck a cake under each ladies seat. Holly smashed down into hers. Maisie pulled her tracksuit bottoms down to show she wasn’t wearing any knickers and sat down splat onto her cake.

“Congratulations Holly please celebrate with 20 gallons of pig swill from above and do a celebratory Irish Dance with Maisie as you have now passed Totty Tickler Time” Holly read out. Both her and Maisie screamed as the thick mushy liquid crashed down on them. It knocked Holly out of her seat and as Maisie stood up to help her she typically too fell over as her tracksuit bottoms were around her ankles. Maisie kicked off her tracksuit bottoms and even yelled “If you take it off, it stays off”. She dragged Holly to her feet and they started doing some comedy Irish Dancing together as the last of the foam and the water was sprayed onto them. Not surprisingly they both fell over again and Holly’s boobs briefly popped out but she pushed them back in again. Maisie boobs bounced around manically as she did her Irish Dancing and she had to end in her splits as the audience cheered as her clean shaven but gunge covered fanny was on show for all to see.

Both totally destroyed and laughing made their way back to the other ladies. “Your first public gunging Holly how did you feel?” Katie asked her. “It was so much fun but I couldn’t have done it without Maisie. Also how did you know about the Irish Dancing?” Holly replied laughing. “I guess I mentioned it” Maura chipped in laughing. “Maisie you have got naked much earlier in the series than we expected” Amber asked. “Well my tuppence was out for most of the Tiswas/OTT show. So everyone has seen it already but I do feel kind of naked now” Maisie replied. “We can fix that” said Katie bringing on Maisie’s high heels. “I kept these on all the way through Tiswas/OTT. But they killed my feet. So I was barefoot for Totty” Maisie replied. “These are exempt from the “If you take it off, it stays off” rule before anyone asks” Katie added as Maisie put her heels back onto cheers and typically gave everyone a good view as she bent down to strap them up.

“Now Sally “Bouncy” Bundock. We hear that you have a rather young adolescent fan club who likes to see your ample well frankly huge boobs bounce up and down. So we have the perfect game for you to play on Bundock’s Bouncy Castle” said Amber pointing Sally towards a bouncy castle being pushed into the studio. “Above the castle you will see some plastic containers sort of like our own Totty Pinatas you have to jump up and pull the cords on each. You can choose either Katie or myself to help you. Plus there is going to be some goodies thrown at whoever is on the castle along the way” Amber added. “So I’ve got to jump up and down in this bikini. What if they come out?” she asked laughing realising what was likely to happen. “If they come out, you can push then back in but if it comes off or you take it off. “It stays off” the audience chorused along with Amber.

“My 15 year old son is watching this with his friends” Sally jokingly protested. “Well I hear they are your biggest fans” Amber replied. “Plus you really squeezed those impressive bouncy Bundock boobies into that bikini. Push them up for a laugh Sally” Katie joked. “Okay, I’m 48, dressed like this probably about to show a lot more on National TV. Here you are you naughty boys” Sally said laughing pushing her boobs up to the camera. “I’ll play the game with you Amber as if I come out of my bikini top you’ll hopefully do so do” Sally added as the audience cheered. “That was what I was hoping” Amber said hugging Sally. “It looks like I’ll be playing the game with Michelle then” Katie added laughing. “What about me?” Maura asked. “We’ve got something planned for you don’t” worry Amber replied.

Laughing Amber and Sally took their places on the bouncy castle. “How about a test bounce?” Amber asked. Sally gently jumped up and down and her boobs bounced up into her face. Amber then did a slightly bigger bounce and her boobs wobbled up and down and her butt cheeks wobbled in her thong bikini bottoms. “Are you happy with this?” Amber asked Sally. “No!” Sally replied laughing. “There are 10 cords to be pulled when I blow the whistle you can start” Katie said.

Katie blew a whistle and both Sally and Amber jumped for their first cords with their boobs bouncing up and down. They looked at each other and burst out laughing. “Keep hold of them with one hand and jump” Sally suggested. She jumped up and pulled her first cord and a load of blue gunge cascaded onto her. “Perf as a Smuf” she joked as blue gunge had been thrown over anyone who said that last week. Suddenly the Phantom threw a bucket of blue gunge at her from a set of steps on one side of the castle. It hit Sally smack in the face as she tried to keep her balance. Amber jumped and got her first cord but was hit by a bucket of red gunge from Katie on the side nearest her. Pulling the string it unleashed more red gunge onto her flattening her big afro hair down and running down her dark toned body. “Your jump Sal” Amber screamed and Sally took a mighty leap as a bucket of water hit her smash in the face from Maura on steps at the back of the bouncy castle. It nearly knocked Sally’s boobs out of her bikini top but she kept them in as she grabbed the string and a load of flour fell onto her. She fell back down onto the bouncy castle in a white cloud of dust.Amber took a might leap and pulled the next cord as Katie threw a bucket of spaghetti over her and Amber was hit with a load of tomato alphabet soup pieces and sauce.

“Sally took a mighty leap and one of her boobs flew out as the Phantom threw a bucket of custard over her. Sally pulled the cord and was covered in Macaroni Cheese sauce as she fell to the floor trying to cover her escaped boob up. “You are a respectable Christian Widow aren’t you?” Amber asked Sally who was sprawled on the floor of the bouncy castle covered in yellow mush. “I used to be until I got to know her” she said pointing at Maura and sticking her finger up at her. “Cheeky Sal” Maura responded and threw another bucket of custard over Sally who was still floundering on the bouncy castle floor. Amber took a huge leap and her boobs flew out of her bikini as Katie launched a bucket of blue gunge at her. Amber pulled the cord and got showered with some foul smelling mashed and watered down blue cheese. Amber held her nose and Sally screamed at the smell. “It’s more putrid than Katie’s fanny” Amber shouted and Katie threw a bucket of the rancid cheese right into Katie’s face. “Thanks very much Amber” Sally said retching. Amber jumped for the next cord and was hit by a bucket of green gunge from Katie as her big bouncy brown boobs bounced up into her face making some of the rancid cheese almost go into her mouth. But she pulled the cord and got hit with a load of mushy peas.

“You need to get at least 4 cords each” Katie stated as Amber was about to jump again. “On by shoulders Sal” Amber suggested. “No way I’ll fall off or you’ll pull my bikini bottoms off” Sally said finally getting back to her feet. “I’ll lift you up then” Amber said as a couple more buckets of yellow gunge rained down on them. Sally jumped and Amber lifted her up but Maura, Katie and the Phantom hit them with a bucket of cream foam in. Sally got one in the face and the other two hit Amber. Sally pulled the cord and a load of custard pie foam rained down on them. But the deluge made Amber lose grip on Sally and as she tried to catch hold of Sally falling through her arms she accidentally caught the tie of Sally’s bikini and as Sally fell down it came undone and remained in Amber’s hands. “If it comes off, It stays off” Katie lead the audience chanting. Sally sat there in a pool of pie foam slowly realising she was topless. “I’m so sorry Sal” Amber said as Sally got to her feet trying to cover her modesty. Amber threw her bikini top off completely and threw them both out of the bouncy castle. “Yours are amazing” Sally complimented her. “Lets see yours then Sal” Amber joked. “I’m going to try and keep my modesty covered” Sally replied trying not to laugh at her predicament. Suddenly the remaining larger Pinata was lowered slightly and they could see there were two chords on it and it was labeled gunk. “Please don’t tell me we both have to pull one of those chords?” Sally asked. “Got it in one” Katie announced.

“It’s your choice if you do it Sal?” Amber asked. Maura began a “Sally, Sally” chant. “Okay, let’s give my adolescent fans a treat although it will embarrass my eldest son. Sorry Big” Sally replied. She and Amber jumped for the final chords and pulled them. Sally tried to keep her boobs covered but as she fell back from pulling her chord her arm came away and her big bouncy boobs swung furiously into view. As she and Amber landed back on the bouncy castle a load of sticky clear gunk engulfed them. “What the hell is that?” Sally asked lifting her gunge covered sticky hands. “What am I like. I mislabeled it” Maisie giggled. “Please don’t tell me it is what I think it is?” Katie asked as tried not to laugh at Amber and Sally sat there topless in the sticky gunk. “It came from a horse stud farm” Maisie giggled. “You mean I’ve been covered in horse spunk!” Sally spluttered. “I’ve been covered in horse spunk, I’ve been covered in horse spunk” she repeated and began to thump her fists into the bouncy castle collapsing into fits of laughter and hugged Amber.

“Please give it up for our Amber and the amazing, inspiring, beautiful and I hope my boobs are as good as hers when I’m 48 the gorgeous bouncy Sally Bundock” Katie said as Amber and Sally walked forward and took a bow with their boobs bouncing down.”Now it’s time to find out who will end up on the Totty Hot Spot under Chute to The Pies. I really wonder who it will be Maura?” Maisie added laughing as all 6 walked or sploshed over to the first 3 stars. “Please welcome Victoria Fritz. You all know her but only one of you will end up on the Totty Hot Spot underneath the Chute to The Pies” Katie said.

Victoria walked on and waved as she got a nice applause. “You know all these 3 ladies then?” Katie asked. “Yes unfortunately. Look at the state of Sal, she smells of rancid cheese, is covered in horse semen and has got her fantastic knockers out on TV. I never thought I’d live to see the day that happened. We just need to get those bikini bottoms off now” Victoria joked. “You try that and you won’t live to see the end of the day Vick” Sally joked. “I think Sally should stand on the square nearest the camera and every woman needs to keep their hands by their sides. Let’s call it the Fritz rule” Victoria added laughing. “I like the Fritz rule” said Maura. “I don’t” said a laughing Sally. “Victoria is only jealous that she couldn’t get on the show too and let us see her amazing tits as she had a baby a few of months ago” Maura teased.

“Well we do have a spot we could use you in when I do my feature with Michelle Keegan and we’d sort you out a fun outfit to wear if you are brave and up for some fun?” Katie asked Victoria. “Hmm let me think. Of course I will” a giggling Victoria replied. “Okay Victoria take your place at the top of our chute. We’ll have Sally Big Boobs Bundock on the first set of stars, Maura on the second and Holly on the third” said Maisie. All the ladies took their place as the camera zoomed in on Sally’s boobs. “**** Off” she said turning away and corpsing with laughter.

“Okay first question please step forward if Victoria has seen you perform a sex act” Katie said. All smiling the 3 women stepped forward. “Step forward if you haven’t been called Slutty on a video chat involving Victoria” Amber said. Laughing Maura and Holly stepped forward. “Maura you told them that” Sally said laughing. “Sorry Slutty” Maura replied as the audience started chanting “Slutty, Slutty” at a laughing Sally. “Step forward ran around a garden naked after getting gunged” Maisie asked. Both ladies stepped forward. “Step forward if you didn’t nearly set a cottage on fire drying a pair of knickers on a radiator” Katie asked. Maura stepped forward onto the Totty Hot Spot and Holly stayed on her spot laughing. “Long story” Holly said giggling.

“Okay Maura you are on our Totty Hot Spot and you may get gunged like this” Katie said as Victoria emptied a bucket of Ham and Pea Soup down the chute and it went splat into Maura’s face and over her beautiful chestnut locks. “No that’s not right. You show her Maisie” Amber said laughing as the naked Maisie tottered forward in her high heels. “You can take it like this” Maisie said laughing as Victoria emptied another bucket of ham and pea soup right over Maisie’s matted and destroyed hair. “Or like this” Maisie added giggling as she pushed her large boobs up under the chute and took a bucket of spaghetti over them and her face. “Or like this” Maisie added sticking her bum out under the chute and getting another bucket of spaghetti over her pert bum. “Nice one Vick” she shouted up the chute and got a bucket of baked beans over her head. “Sorry Maisie” Victoria shouted down giggling. “What” Maisie shouted up the shoot and got another bucket of baked beans over her head. She stood there dripping of beans and said “What Am I Like” as the audience joined in and slid into her signature splits again as the audience cheered.

As Maisie sploshed back Sally whispered to her “You are amazing”. “So are you Sal” Maisie replied tweeking one of Sally’s nipples. Sally playfully smacked Maisie on her bum as Maisie shrieked in surprise. “Okay Victoria, I hear that Maura arranged a surprise 36th birthday gunging for you” Katie asked. “Yes, I was talked into it somehow” Victoria replied laughing. “What did she empty over you?” Katie asked “Well there was some of this” said Victoria emptying a bucket of red gunge down the chute over Maura’s head. “Well plenty of this” Victoria added pouring another bucket of red gunge down the chute over Maura’s head. “Anything else?” Amber asked. “Well some of this” Victoria said emptying a bucket of porridge down the chute over Maura’s head. The thick lumpy porridge ran down Maura’s long dark hair and she jokingly shampooed it in. Suddenly Victoria dumped a bucket of lumpy gravy down the chute over Maura making her splutter as the gravy ran down her face and over her boobs and she jumped up and down in shock.

“How do you want to take the next bucket?! Katie asked a now laughing Maura. “Over my boobs” Maura replied removing her bikini top to cheers and wolf whistles. She positioned her pert boobs under the chute and Victoria emptied a bucket of baked beans down the chute. It went over Maura’s breasts and face as she laughed. “Is that all you’ve got” she shouted up the chute and got a bucket of ham and pea soup right in her face. “How will you take your last item?” Amber asked her. “Down my bikini briefs” Maura responded and bent over holding the back of her bikini briefs open as Victoria emptied another bucket of porridge down the chute. “Its gone right up my bum” Maura said laughing as she stepped forward to take her applause.

“Come and join us Victoria” Amber said. “You said you wanted to take part in the show so here is the outfit you will be wearing” she added as a sexy referee outfit flashed up on the screen.

“A tie top perfect for pulling open and exposing those big tits” Maura said laughing as Victoria groaned. “Yes it must be tied with a Bundock bow for ease of removal and no bra underneath” Sally added. “Sounds good to me” Katie said as Victoria smiled and shook her head.

Suddenly Michelle Keegan appeared on the screen in a skimpy back bikini.

“You are going down Katie Thistleton when we have an extreme mud wrestle the last one with any clothes left on is the winner and that might also include the referee. So you have been warned Victoria” Michelle said laughing.

“What have I let myself in for?” Victoria said giggling. “You will referee it won’t you?” Michelle asked.”Of course no-one will mess with Fritz the Tits” Victoria responded to cheers. “Join us after the break for Part 2 where BBC Northern Ireland Correspondent will amaze Maisie in Maisie I’m Amazed. Rosamund and Thandie chat to Paris Dylan and I mud wrestle Our Girl star Michelle Keegan” said Katie as they signed off from Part One.


Holly’s House Party: Season 1 Episode 5

$
0
0

Although this story mentions real persons, corporations, TV shows and places, it is purely a work of fiction for personal enjoyment. The story does NOT describe real events and should NOT be taken to accurately portray any real entity mentioned. In keeping with its fictional nature, the events and activities described in the story may not be legal, ethical or safe. This site does NOT endorse or recommend their enactment.

4f7c27c8aa9e409fd82a59b6cbeda53e (1)

Holly Willoughby welcomed the audience back to the House Party “Ladies and gentlemen, as you know, the Olympics are coming up. And we’ve had athletes all over Crinkley Bottom recently. Yes, they’ve come from all over the world and are stopping over in our lovely little town. I wonder if any will drop by the House Party…” The doorbell rang, and Holly went over and opened the door to find…

Czech beach volleyball player Marketa Slukova.

main-qimg-1faab2b37d29f78f91f17d5b09a3e830

Holly looked surprised while the crowd hooted and whistled. Marketa showed up in a swimsuit and with a volleyball, truly looking as if she just stopped by en route to the Olympics. “Well, well, well” Holly said “Our first guest of the evening. Whats on your mind?” Marketa responded with confidence “Oh, Im just stopping by. Ive heard alot about the House Party. Personally, I think it would be great to see some English athletes get gunged. Kinda like what will happen to the UK at the Olympics this year.” She said this with a smirk as the crowd booed. Holly shook her head in mock disgust. She went to speak, but the doorbell rang once again. Holly opened the door to find…

English soccer star Leah Williamson

leah-williamson-723

The crowd cheered loudly for the National Team star. Leah was in her soccer kit, also looking like she was just stopping by. Holly welcomed her “Leah, its good to see you. What brings you to the House Party?” Leah answered “Well, correct me if Im wrong, but I thought I heard someone trash-talking the UK.” Holly nodded and gestured toward a determined looking Marketa. Leah continued “I also heard someone say that they wanted a UK athlete to get gunged?” Holly once again nodded and the audience responded with a collective “Yeah.” Leah thought for a moment “Holly, I dont wanna take over here, but I think we should have a vote. Me and Marketa, and the loser gets gunged. The people decide who it is, and I cant wait to see the public pick her.” Marketa shot Leah an exagerrated icy glare and spoke “Well, I like to think these people will choose a winner, regardless of where they’re from. And that winner will be me.”

Holly chuckled, and the girls attempted to hold back smiles as they tried to maintain their “feuding” characters. Holly finished “Get your votes in for who gets gunged. Leah or Marketa. Loser goes in the gunge tank. Join us later to see who gets it!” Both girls left the stage to much applause, pretending bicker as they left. Holly finished “And we have loads more guests and surprises coming up, make sure to stay with us!”

The Alternative Euro 2020: The Final – Part 2

$
0
0

Although this story mentions real persons, corporations, TV shows and places, it is purely a work of fiction for personal enjoyment. The story does NOT describe real events and should NOT be taken to accurately portray any real entity mentioned. In keeping with its fictional nature, the events and activities described in the story may not be legal, ethical or safe. This site does NOT endorse or recommend their enactment.

(This story contains nudity)

This story follows on from part 1 https://tellygunge.wordpress.com/2020/05/24/the-alternative-euro-2020-the-final-part-1/

During the advert break, Rachel took her chance to get a well earned refreshment before returning to the studio floor just in time for part 2.

The cameras started to roll as she walked on and welcomed the viewers again. C5B05A99-75CC-490A-A61B-9F50574F5E01 “Thanks for rejoining our show, and I t’s time we give our winner their prize…..”

The blonde suddenly cut short her sentence as she looked towards the X-frame where Natalie had been secured to. But it was now empty with no Natalie in sight.

”Oh! What’s happened to Natalie?”


From the side of the studio, walked on Natalie who had now changed into a red dress, black stockings and high heel shoes. She looked very pleased with herself and sat herself down on a chair behind a desk. “Here I am Rachel” 71E4DFC8-83C1-4FE6-80EF-7AADBEEF0901

”How come you are not on the X-frame?”

”Let’s just say I and the university students came to a satisfactory arrangement and they released me!”

”What kind of arrangement?”

”Why don’t you ask them yourself, here they come now”

The 5 male university students aged between 19 and 21 years old walked on and stood in a line next to Rachel who was now frowning. The show had taken an unexpected turn of events and she wanted an explanation.

Rachel has her hands on her hips and raised her eyebrows “Well?”

Student 1: “Natalie has promised to…” *coughs* “….make it worth our while after the show, so to speak”

Rachel looks over to a smiling Natalie “What on earth have you agreed to do?”

Student 2 interrupts “That’s between Natalie and us!”

Student 3: “And so we need to dish out her winning prize to someone else”

Student 3: “Yes, to someone who is as deserving as she is”

Rachel‘s expression changed as all the students were now looking at her. 5BECCC08-33E3-477A-8AA8-75AFE483A9B9“Oh no! I thought I might end up messy at some stage as presenters of these shows usually do, but I can’t believe I’m going to get the winners prize!”

The blonde mathematician was walked to one of the X-frames and had her wrists and ankles secured to the ends. A smiling Natalie approached her with a pair of scissors in her hand “I think I speak for all the sports news reporters who have been involved in this little competition and we think you have enjoyed messing us up far too much for our liking!”

With a quick snip of the scissors, Natalie set about cutting through Rachel’s yellow minidress until she was able to remove it. This revealed that the blonde was wearing a matching white bra and knickers set.

Stepping back from the scantily clad lady, Natalie returned back to her chair and pushed a large button on her desk.

This revealed that the X-frame was attached to an overhead motor, and it lifted the frame into the air. Rachel squealed as the frame moved horizontally until it was directly above a huge vat. Slowly the frame tilted 90 degrees so that the frame was flat with Rachel’s body facing downwards to where the vat was.

Sniffing the aroma from the vat, Rachel could guess what it was filled with “That smells like gravy to me!”

”Correct Rachel. Although it’s not your ordinary watery gravy – it’s the thickest and lumpiness variety we can find! Enjoy!”

Rachel squealed again as the frame began to slowly descend and dipped underneath the murky brown gooey surface, taking the underwear-clad Rachel with it.

Pausing for a second or two, the frame was then raised slightly, and just enough so that Rachel was out of the gravy. The slender presenter spluttered as she resurfaced, showing the viewers that she was now coated in slimy gravy. Her previously freshly washed hair was now in brown mucky clumps and her white underwear was now a matching brown colour.

”Yuck! That was disgusting”

”You better get used to it Rachel, as we are going to dip you in the gravy a few more times”

”But you can’t do…..   !”

Rachel was unable to complete her sentence as the frame lowered and she was submerged yet again in the gloopy stuff before being raised again.

The dipping became comical as it carried on another 10 times, with each dip seemingly getting more audience applause than the previous dip. By the end of the 10th dip, Rachel had been thoroughly sploshed with gravy and the frame was raised and moved horizontally and then set back down onto the studio floor with Rachel back in an upright position. The Countdown presenter was able to open her eyes and see the students lined up in front of her, each holding two custard pies.

”Now guys, you really don’t have to do this!” pleaded Rachel

The students only smiled in response as one by one they slapped the pies all over Rachel.

Natalie chuckled from her seated position “Blimey Rachel, you have been properly messed up!”

It was then she saw the 5 students start to approach her, and Natalie got that sinking feeling.DCB3AEB0-582F-40D2-A91F-78A6FC71FD59 “Hey, what are you guys doing? I thought we had a deal?”

Student 1: “Whilst that was very appealing Natalie, and obviously the 5 of us would very much enjoy what you were offering, we had to think of the viewers and they certainly wouldn’t want to miss out on your first prize. After all, you are the Alternative Euro 2020 champion.”

Natalie: “But we shook on it!” C7495933-6B66-403A-BBA6-935BDA4E6F53

The busty brunette seemed completely shocked as she realised that she was about to get sploshed yet again.

The students stood her up, and marched her to the vacant X-frame that was next to the gravy coated Rachel. As she was being secured to her frame, Natalie looked over to Rachel who just smiled back at her “You didn’t really think the students would leave you clean?”

Natalie didn’t respond, and sighed as one of the students took out a pair of scissors and started to cut through the front of her dress. He made quick work of relieving the garment from Natalia’s body to reveal that she was wearing black lingerie of bra, knickers, stockings and suspenders.

The runner up, Anna Woolhouse, had obviously used the break to get cleaned up from her molasses dunking as she walked onto the studio in dressing gown and slippers. Unfortunately for Natalie, she was holding a pair of scissors.

Student 3: “So Anna, is there anything you want to do before we give Natalie her winners prize. Any revenge perhaps for being beaten into runners-up place?”

Anna: “Hmmm! What could I possibly do? How about this?”

Using the scissors, Anna snipped through Natalie’s bra straps and the sides of her knickers before pulling both garments away from Natalie’s body. The audience gasped as her large bouncy tits and shaved muff were revealed yet again on live national TV.

Student 4: “We feel a bit sorry for you Nat, so we’ll help to cover you up!”

What followed was a custard pie frenzy as all the remaining fifty or so pies were splatted all over Natalie until she was completely covered. The button on the desk was pressed which meant the frame was raised and lowered into the vat of gravy, which made Natalie squeal. The students were particularly mischievous and dipped her in a total of twenty times.

Instead of returning her and the frame to the studio floor, the frame was then manoeuvred until it was hovering above the molasses tank. The gravy coated Natalie drew breath as her face and body was only inches away from the sticky black surface. It was then she felt the bounds on her wrists and ankles give way and with nowhere to go other than downwards, Natalie slopped into the waiting molasses. A sticky black figure emerged from the depths of the tank as the students began to wrap up the end of the show.

However, there was still time for Rachel to be released from her X-frame, carried over to the molasses tank and thrown in, to join the topless winner.

As the credits rolled, all the other sports news presenters that had been in the competition suddenly walked on and quickly surrounded the 5 university students. They had evil grins on their faces as they looked ready to administer some revenge for all the mess that they had been subjected to. The programme finished just as each of the students was being grabbed……..

Totty Episode 2 Part 2 with Paris Dylan, Emma Vardy, Michelle Keegan, Maura Higgins, Holly Hamilton and Sally Bundock,

$
0
0

Although this story mentions real persons, corporations, TV shows and places, it is purely a work of fiction for personal enjoyment. The story does NOT describe real events and should NOT be taken to accurately portray any real entity mentioned. In keeping with its fictional nature, the events and activities described in the story may not be legal, ethical or safe. This site does NOT endorse or recommend their enactment.This story will contain scenes of nudity and/or a sexual nature. 

“Welcome to Part 2 of the second Episode of Totty” said a naked an gunge covered Maisie Smith. “We had a lot of fun in the first part with Maura Higgins, Holly Hamilton and especially Sally Bundock” a topless and equally messy Amber Gill adds. Maura and Sally are topless in bikini bottoms and Holly is still in a thong bikini. All are covered in gunge. “Did you enjoy Part 1 Sally?” Katie Thistleton in a vest top and shorts asked. “Well I never thought I’d end up topless on TV with Horse Spunk in my belly button” Katie replies laughing. Flicking some gunk from her belly button at Katie. “I was sorry I meant to label it Spunk not Gunk” Maisie said. “Tell you what Sal. Lets get gunged together under the proper gunk. What do you say?” Maisie asked. “Why not, as long as Holly joins us” Sally replied. “I’m already messy so let’s go for it” Holly added.

Maisie tottered off on her high heels ushering Sally and Holly behind her. They stood under a big tank labeled “Gunk” and there was a chain to pull. “Who fancies pulling it?” Maisie asked. “I will” said Sally and pulled it as a deluge of a couple of gallons of cloudy sticky liquid cascaded down on them. Sally and Holly screamed and stood there sticky with it dripping off them. “Oops, What Am I Like. I forgot to get them changed over again” Maisie giggled. “You mean I’ve gunged myself in Horse Spunk again!” Sally screamed lifting her sticky hands and trying to move off the sticky floor. “You pair have covered me in Horse Spunk too!” shrieked Holly as she playfully launched herself at Maisieand the pair rolled around on the floor. Sally tried to separate them put get dragged into the melee as Maisie was almost dragged around the floor in the sticky chaos.

In the chaos as Sally was trying to get Holly off Maisie. Holly’s nice boobs game out of her bikini top. She tried to cover them up but seeing her opportunity Sally pulled her bikini top right off yelling “If it comes off, it stays off” as the audience joined in. Sally was waiving Holly’s bikini top about as Holly and Maisie looked at each other and whipped down Sally’s bikini briefs. Maisie yelled Phantom who ran on and stuck two custard pies onto Sally’s big wobbly bum cheeks. Sally froze and stood there in shock as she realised she was naked on TV. She reached down to try to pull her bikini briefs up but slipped over in the spunk as Maisie and Holly pulled them off yelling “If it comes off, it stays off” and running back across the stage to Amber, Maura and Katie.

“You’ve got great breasts Holly” Amber said. “Thanks. I didn’t mean to get them out quite this early” Holly admitted laughing. Sally stormed back across the stage totally naked with her clean shaven muff on display. “Give them back!” she shouted at Holly who handed them to Maisie who threw Sally’s bikini briefs into the audience. “We’ve all seen it now Sal, just keep your legs closed and you’ll be okay” Amber said to try and reassure Sally. “Slutty keeping her legs closed that will be a first” Maura chipped in as she hugged Sally. “Look at the ******* state of me. Naked and covered in Horse Spunk” Sally said unsure whether to laugh or cry. “You have an amazing body Sally. Don’t we think so audience?” Katie asked. The audience cheered. “You got me covered in horse spunk, got my top off and rolled around naked with Maisie. That is cool in my book Sal” Holly suggested. “Not many women my age would do or want to do that. But I hope my adolescent fanbase enjoyed it” Sally said smiling. “Their discharge was probably bigger than the horse’s?” Maisie said thinking aloud. “True” replied Sally and hugged Maisie.

“Lets link up with Thandie, Rosamund and their guest Paris Dylan” said Katie. They linked up in LA with Rosamund, Thandie and Paris. Rosamund was in a mismatched bikini, Thandie in shorts and vest and Paris in just a thong with her hands over her massive breasts.

“Hi ladies” Katie said. “I see Maisie has been going crazy and managed to cover two BBC reporters with horse spunk” Rosamund. “Two lots actually” Sally shouted laughing. “Paris seems enthusiastic?” Amber asked. “Yes we were playing Truth or Dare just before you came over and she lost” Thandie added. “Paris is very ticklish too” Rosamund said laughing as they began to tickle her. Paris laughed and her hands flapped about allowing her huge breasts to bounce about in view. “Every time she laughs. She gets an American Cream Pie” Thandie said as she and Rosamund gave Paris two pies in the face making her laugh again. They then stuck a pie on each of her boobs and she continued to laugh so they gave her another pie sandwich on her head. She stood there covered in cream unable to stop laughing so they sat her big butt cheeks splat into another two pies. “Are you having fun Paris?” Thandie asked. “You are a right pair of bitches” she said laughing. “Right she’s now getting a bucket of just melted Ben and Jerry’s Cookie Dough over her lovely long dark hair. You’ll like that Paris won’t you?” Rosamund asked. Paris continued to laugh as Thandie emptied the bucket of just melted ice cream over her head. She screamed and jumped about manically as it ran down her gorgeous long black hair and ran over her face. “Rub it in your boobs Paris” Thandie said and Paris willingly did so.

“It’s not right Paris should have all the fun” Thandie said hitting Rosamund with a double pie in the face. “Is that the best you have got Newton?” Rosamund asked and dumped a bucket of crushed Blueberries over Thandie’s head. “Here Paris. Lets give her a real American Pieing” Rosamund added as she and Paris rained half a dozen cream pies onto Thandie’s head as she laughed and screamed. Paris picked up a bucket of maple syrup and emptied it over Rosamund’s head. Rosamund stood there laughing as the syrup slowly ran down her hair and over her face. She removed her bikini top and let her impressive boobs bounce free. She and Paris pulled Thandie’s vest over her head to reveal her pert boobs. They then threw Thandie headfirst into the Hot Tub this week full of Pie Cream. Thandie went splat into the cream as Rosamund and Paris rubbed boobs together and touched to tips of their tongues,

Rosamund suddenly pushed Paris into the hot tub just as Thandie yanked Rosamund in. All three went under the cream and then emerged completely covered and playfully rubbed the cream into each others’ breasts. “Is that naughty enough for you girls back in London. Just to say next week we have confirmed Emily Blunt who has this message for us” Thandie said.

The screen cut to Emily sat on a bed in her LA home. She was clearly braless as her nipple pokies were on view.

“Hi Thandie and Roz. You didn’t let me know about the Tiswas OTT Revival where you pair ran riot. But next week the wait is over as I’m coming to get you. One of you buggers wrote Emily Blunt has a big hairy **** on a piece of paper and stuck it on my back at last year’s SAG Awards. I was walking around for 2 hours before Meryl Streep took it off and showed me. Well you will probably find out if it is true as I’ll be in my sexiest bikini and I’m going to get some messy revenge on you two” Emily said laughing and blowing a kiss to the camera. “We heard that it smells as bad as Thandie’s and it is as hairy as Elisabeth Dermot Walsh’s was. Does John your husband need a search party to find him when he gives you a muff dive?” Rosamund asked. “I may answer that next week if you can think up a fun enough challenge for me to do” Emily teased replying. “We might give your squatch a fun waxing?” Thandie replied. “That would make my eyes water” Emily concluded laughing as she signed off.

“Naomie Harris is also confirmed and Evan Rachel Wood. We are still talking to Halle Berry and we may just be able to get Cindy Crawford and her daughter Kaia Gerber as a mother and daughter double act to end the series” Rosamund said as she and Thandie dunked Paris under the pie cream again and handed back to the studio.

“That is some line up they have got but we have got Cleo Demetriou and the So Awkward Girls next week when our special guest will be Maya Jama and the week after we have a sports special with Katarina Johnson-Thompson, Fallon Sherrock Dina Asher-Smith and making a return after her Tiswas/OTT appearance Johanna Konta” Amber said.

“Now it’s time for Maisie I’m Amazed where a celeb shows me a hidden talent and impresses me. So please welcome BBC Northern Ireland Correspondent Emma Vardy” Maisie said.

Emma walked on in a very high cut wetsuit carrying a surfboard.

“You’ve clearly waxed the Vardy squatch” Maisie said looking at Emma’s high cut outfit. “Maybe?” Emma responded sexily. “So you clearly enjoy surfing?” Maisie asked. “Yes, I was told you were the sharpest person on the set. But looking at the state of Sally, Holly and Maura over there it makes sense” Emma replied waving to the girls. “I never thought I’d see the day Sally Bundock was naked on TV scooping horse spunk out of her belly button” she added laughing at the state of Sally who stuck her finger in her belly button and ran over to Emma with her boobs bouncing up and down and her bum wobbling and ran her fingers through Emma’s hair.

“Okay you clearly surf so we’ll have a fun go at that” said Maisie pointing to two surfboards set up against a blue screen. Maisie incredibly stood on her surfboard in her heels as crash mats were positioned around her. Emma jumped on hers and Surfin USA by The Beach Boys started playing. Suddenly they were hit with several buckets of water as the screen behind them starting displaying surfing footage. “Another big wave” Maisie shouted as they were hit with more buckets of water. Maisie slipped and her legs went splayed either side of her surf board so people could see everything. “You winked at me” Emma joked. “What Am I like” Maisie replied and incredibly did her splits on the surfboard but just as she did so. Several buckets of cold yogurt were thrown at them. Emma took a couple over her head completely covering and making her long blonde hair lank with white yogurt dripping from it. “The seagulls are big this year” Maisie shouted. The yogurt hitting Maisie knocked her off her surfboard still in the splits position and she fell onto the crash mats with her legs in the air as more water and yogurt were thrown at them. Emma was laughing so much at Maisie that she lost her balance and fell on top of Maisie in heaps of laughter. Suddenly they heard a plummeting sound and a load of rotten eggs hit them. “That eagle lays one hell of an egg” Maisie shouted as she struggled up. “That really stinks” Emma replied laughing as she got up. “You are so funny” she added hugging Maisie.

“Thanks, but I hear that you have another skill. You can demonstrate?” Maisie asked Emma. “Yes, I’m a trained circus aerialist and I’m going to show you some tricks on the silks and at the end descend into a bath of chocolate sauce and hopefully reemerge” Emma replied. “Well Maisie is Amazed” Maisie replied as the audience cheered and a photo of Emma doing her Ariel skills was shown.

“I’m a bit overdressed for this Emma said unzipping her wetsuit and sliding it down to reveal a sexy bikini underneath. “Can you pull it off me please Maisie?” she asked. Maisie laughing bent over giving everyone a great view up her bum and fanny as she pulled Emma’s wetsuit but Emma held onto it and Maisie dragged her across the floor. Emma then let go and Maisie fell backwards on her backside in a heap. Emma laughing helped her up and they hugged. “Wow you have a great body” Maisie said complimenting Emma.

Emma grabbed hold of her silks and spun up into the air as the audience cheered. She arched her back and slid into an ariel splits as she hung upside down. Her boobs just about staying in her bikini. She expertly worked up and down her silks as Maisie wheeled the bath of chocolate sauce into place as Emma did a front splits. Emma worked her way up to the top of her silks and then rolled down it stopping just short of the chocolate sauce and laughing. “This time” she said and shimmied up to the top of her silks and plummeted down into the sauce. She quickly reemerged totally covered the chocolate sauce dripping from her long blonde hair and athletic body. She worked her way up to the top of the silks again did an overhead splits again before gracefully sliding down the silks headfirst into the chocolate sauce before emerging with her bikini top in her hands and doing one more overhead splits on the silks as her boobs bounced loose as the audience cheered,

“That was amazing and so sexy Emma” Maisie said. “I’d love a go” she added and grabbed hold of the silks and slid into her splits but predictably went headfirst into the chocolate sauce. A worried Emma looked into the bath but a hand shot up and pulled a screaming Emma in with her. Laughing the two ladies rolled around in the chocolate sauce before emerging smiling over the side of the bath. “Please give it up for Emma Vardy who proved that Maisie is Amazed” Maisie said as the audience cheered. “Maisie is Amazing, cheer her too” Emma yelled as they took a bow.

“Please welcome the gorgeous star of Our Girl Michelle Keegan” Katie said as Michelle walked onto huge wolf whistles and cheers in a skimpy black bikini.

This image has an empty alt attribute; its file name is image-48.png

“So we are going to have a mud wrestle I hear?” Michelle said. “Yes but we’ll have a warm up first” Katie said pointing to the bath of chocolate sauce which Maisie and Emma had just vacated. “Please welcome our special referee Victoria “Tits” Fritz” Katie added as Victoria bounced on waving.


“The original referee’s outfit didn’t fit my massive tits so I’ve had to wear this one instead” Victoria said pushing her boobs up cheekily. Michelle and Katie began to walk towards the chocolate bath but went past a box of eggs placed on the floor. Michelle picked the box up and opened it and began to smash the eggs onto Katie’s head. “What’s that for?” Katie asked laughing. “Because I felt like it” Michelle responded. They then came to a custard pie and Michelle again picked it up and this time called “Tits” to a giggling Victoria who walked up and received the pie smack in the face. The 3 ladies carried on walking and just before the bath there was a bucket of baked beans placed there. Katie said to Michelle “You were that mouthy chav Tina McIntyre on Corrie weren’t you?”. “Yes I played her for over 6 years” Michelle replied smiling. “We have a punishment we give to former mouthy chavs on Totty. Give us a hand Tits” Katie said to Victoria. Suddenly they hoisted Michelle upside down and dunked her head right into the bucket of baked beans. Gasping Michelle has lifted out of the bucket as her long dark locks were dripping with baked beans. “These mouthy chavs are always skinny cows but at least this one has a half decent pair of tits. Must have saved up and got them done I guess” Katie said. “Yes, bet she wished she had a pair like mine” Victoria replied.

“You cheeky *******” Michelle shouted but was dunked head first into the beans again. As she was lifted back out coughing and gasping Victoria said “She married Reg Dwight I read”. “She’ll be disappointed” Katie replied. Michelle was now corpsing laughing at her husband’s name being confused. “One more good ducking I reckon” Katie said as they stuck Michelle’s head back into the bucket of beans. They then flipped her the right way up with the bucket of beans on her head. The beans ran down Michelle’s tanned and toned body. Katie stuck a handful down the back of Michelle’s bikini briefs and Victoria stuck some into Michelle’s bikini top. Michelle had her back to the bath of chocolate sauce now Victoria took the bucket off her head as Katie pushed her backwards into the bath. Michelle screamed as she sploshed backwards into the chocolate. She emerged totally covered before pulling a laughing Katie in on top of her. They splashed around in the chocolate as Victoria stood by laughing. Michelle grabbed the bucket filling it with chocolate sauce and tipping it over Victoria’s head.

Victoria stood there with the chocolate sauce running down her hair and face onto her large boobs. Katie and Michelle sat on the side of the bath and pulled Victoria headfirst into the chocolate. Laughing they dragged a totally covered Victoria out of the bath. “Now I’m ready for a mud wrestle are you Chelle?” Katie asked. “You bet” Michelle replied laughing as they headed to a large paddling pool full of muddy soil. “Okay so are we happy with the rules. Whoever has the most clothing left is the winner?” Katie asked.”What have you got on under that sports vest?” Michelle asked Katie. “Nothing” Katie replied lifting it up to flash her large boobs. Suddenly Michelle and Victoria pulled the vest top off over her head and threw her head first into the mud. Katie emerged covered in mud and pulled Michelle by her bikini bottoms backwards into the mud. Victoria climbed in and separated them as Michelle readjusted her bikini briefs. “We need a ring girl where are you Maisie?” Katie asked. Maisie climbed into the pool holding a sign saying “No rounds” but typically fell over in her heels and the other girls dunked her into the mud. “Don’t do the splits or you’ll never get back up” Katie pleaded but Maisie ignored her and slid into her splits and shouted “I can’t get back up”. As the girls tried to help her up the studio’s fake rain sprinklers started drizzling overhead. “This is going to get really muddy” Michelle giggled.

They got Maisie to her feet and dumped her over the side of the pool with her head, body and boobs outside but her legs and bum still inside the pool. “Okay. Let’s have a clean fight” Victoria said laughing. Katie and Michelle circled each other. Suddenly Katie grabbed one of Michelle’s feet and tripped her up into the mud and pulled her bikini bottoms right off. Katie pushed mud into Michelle’s fanny and into her face but Michelle pulled Katie down with her legs and rolled over on top of her. She reached down and unzipped Katie’s shorts and pulled them off her flailing legs as a load more muddy water was dumped on all three women. “Okay break” Victoria said as Katie struggled to her feet now in just a thong. “Are you clean shaved Chelle?” Katie asked laughing looking at Michelle’s muddy fanny. “It was last time I saw it” Michelle replied laughing. “Tits should have them on view I reckon” Katie said. Suddenly Katie and Michelle grabbed hold of Victoria and pulled her top up and over her head exposing her large breasts. Victoria pushed her boobs up and as she was still lactating squirted milk into Michelle’s and then Katie’s face.

Amber, Maura, Sally, Holly and Emma had now gathered by the side of the pool and pulled Maisie fully out. “Fight to the finish” Amber shouted as Katie, Michelle and Victoria circled each other. Maisie stood up by the side of the pool and said “One more surprise to come” as a load of smelly manure crashed down on the 3 ladies in the pool. “I’ve got shit in my hair” Michelle screamed and reached out for Maisie but Katie grabbed hold of her bikini top and ripped it right off as Maisie pushed Michelle backwards into the smelly mud. Victoria squirted more milk into Katie’s eyes and rolled her over with her legs in the air and whipped her thong right off. As Victoria celebrated Katie and Michelle pulled her hot pants down to leave her naked and pulled her back into the smelly mud.

Sally was laughing at them all but suddenly Holly and Maura tipped her headfirst into the mud as more manure rained down on the ladies in the pool. “Horse spunk, Horse shit I’ve been ****** covered with tonight” Sally raged but unable to stop laughing. “You are in luck” Maisie shouted and threw a final bucket of horse semen over Sally’s head. But as Maisie did this Amber pushed her back into the mud. Sally dived on Maisie and they rolled around in the foul smelling mud. Amber was pulled in by Katie. Maura chucked Holly in but Emma sneaked up behind Maura and pushed her in. The girls slowly got up and all pulled Emma in and they all started rolling about.

Katie pulled Amber’s bikini bottoms off. Maura’s were pulled off by Sally and Maisie. Victoria got a struggling Holly’s thong bottoms off and they all circled Emma and dived on top of her as she jokingly dropped her bikini bottoms. The 8 ladies all rolled around in the smelly mud as a load more muddy water crashed down on them. Everyone was totally covered with mud as Katie crawled to the side of the pool and shouted “We need to sign off ladies”. “Was everyone clean shaved/” Amber shouted. “Yes” all the ladies shouted back. “Where are you Maisie say goodnight” Katie said. Maisie emerged unrecognizable under all the mud and said “Goodnight Maisie” as Victoria squirted breast milk into her face as they all waved goodbye.

Holly’s House Party: Season 1 Episode 5

$
0
0

Although this story mentions real persons, corporations, TV shows and places, it is purely a work of fiction for personal enjoyment. The story does NOT describe real events and should NOT be taken to accurately portray any real entity mentioned. In keeping with its fictional nature, the events and activities described in the story may not be legal, ethical or safe. This site does NOT endorse or recommend their enactment.

4f7c27c8aa9e409fd82a59b6cbeda53e (1)

Holly came back from commercial chuckling. “Welcome back folks, now before we get started with one of my favirite segments, I just want to give you guys a picture of what to expect from the Housr Party going forward.” With this, a video segment played, narrated by Holly:

“Coming soon” Clips played of each guest as they were announced. “A host of Youtubers try to make us go viral, things get spicy when models Lucy Pinder and Emily Ratajkowski drop by, singer Madison Beer will be here to tell us about her new music, an age-old question will get answered House Party-style, and some guests will give us a look at the past few decades of Blue Peter. All this and more, right here on the House Party!”

The audience clapped as the camera returned to the main stage. Holly spoke again “Yes, there are quite a few wxciting things happening going forward, but right now its time for the gunge vote!” Holly ran over to where the gunge tank spun out from the wall. On either side sat Leah Williamson

leah-williamson-723

And on the other side sat Marketa Slukova

main-qimg-1faab2b37d29f78f91f17d5b09a3e830

Thick and chunky green slime, similar to the classic Nickelodeon gunge, sat atop the tank. “Yes we made the gunge particularly nasty, in our Battle of the Nations here. Representing the UK we have Leah, and representing our international foes is Marketa. Ladies and gentlemen, you’ve been voting non-stop. The time has come, lets see the results…”

The crowd roared in approval. Marketa looked angry while Leah pumped her fists in celebration. Holly laughed “Well Marketa, the public voted with their hearts, and they voted you to get gunged. Please take your seat.” Marketa frowned, but did as she was told. She stood up to hoots and whistles and sat in the tank. Holly finished “I guess the good thing is that you’re not wearing too much. And with that, I say goodbye.

Thick and chunky green gunge flew down onto Marketa. Her hair was first covered, and then her face was covered. It fell onto her body and her exposed skin, highlighting her flat stomach and toned legs. When it ended, her facial features were obscured with the thick muck. It was clear that was playing up her displeasure and humiliation. She sat still, with the gunge all over her. The audience applauded while Holly and Leah laughed. Holly began “Marketa, I hope you had fun, and I hope you learned something today. Dont anger the population of the UK.” The crowd roared in approval. “But really, thank you for being such a great sport. Look at the bright side, you’ll have a one-of-a-kind look at the Olympics. Have a good night, and good luck going forward!” Marketa nodded her gunge-covered head while the tank and the seat carrying the victorious Leah spun away…

Note From The Network: Youtubers Saffron Barker, Amelia Gething, and Holly H are on the House Party. Will they be gunged? Theres only one way to find out…

Holly’s House Party: Season 1, Episode 6

$
0
0

Although this story mentions real persons, corporations, TV shows and places, it is purely a work of fiction for personal enjoyment. The story does NOT describe real events and should NOT be taken to accurately portray any real entity mentioned. In keeping with its fictional nature, the events and activities described in the story may not be legal, ethical or safe. This site does NOT endorse or recommend their enactment.

4f7c27c8aa9e409fd82a59b6cbeda53e (1)

The signature NHP music blared as the camera swung towards Holly Willoughby, who stood at center-stage. The crowd applauded until Holly began to speak “Welcome back to the House Party folks! Right, right, right. We have an amazing show planned for you tonight. So many guests, a couple of performances, surprises, and of course, gunge. Now ladies and gentlemen, something that didnt exist during the old House Party was social media. Nowadays, it seems everyone is on social media. And everyone knows the various social media starlets. Tonight, we’re gonna see who is more popular…” Holly trailed off as she ran over to three seats, each containing a different girl.

Holly began again “Now lets meet our guests for this evening. They’ve joined us here for the night, and some of them are gonna be leaving different than the way they came in. Brave gals. First up is Amelia Gething!”

ameliagething_20200401_2

The crowd cheered while Amelia waved back eagerly with both hands. Holly moved to the second chair “Next up is Saffron Barker!”

87cf4dc0-f00a-11e9-afb8-fb57a6b62422

Saffron struck a “glamorous” pose while the crowd cheered. Holly finished “Last one here, and wouldn’t ya know we share a name, it’s Holly H!”

hollyh_20200517_2

The crowd cheered loudly once again while Holly H shyly waved back.  Holly began again “Well ladies, tonight you will be in a competition that one of you will enjoy, and the other two won’t. Fans will who vote on which one of you is their favorite. Whoever gets the most votes is our winner, and gets bragging rights and all that jazz. The two who get the least amount of votes go for a trip around the house and get covered in all sorts of gunge.” The crowd cheered while Amelia and Saffron looked ready to compete and Holly H looked nervous. “Now ladies, please tell us why you should be spared.”

Amelia spoke first “Well Holly, I have my own tv show. Ive been on all the big shows, my followers will help me out.” The crowd clapped while Holly moved to Saffron who spoke “Personally, I think Im the biggest star. Can any of these girls say that they were on Strictly? I dont think so.” Finally, Holly moved to Holly H who looked anxious before speaking “Look, I just dont wanna get gunged” she said while laughing nervously “I like my hair and makeup, please dont gunge me.” The crowd didnt seem to agree, and began to playfully call for her gunging.

“Alright, you lot, settle down.” bellowed Holly. “Now remember, whoever gets the most votes is our champion and leaves clean as a whistle. Unfortunately for second and third place, there only prize will be a hearty gunging. So youre voting on who you want to save. Get to voting, vote as much as you like, and we’ll see the results later on.”

Voting closes Sunday at 1 PM EST

Viewing all 2340 articles
Browse latest View live