Although this story mentions real persons, corporations, TV shows and places, it is purely a work of fiction for personal enjoyment. The story does NOT describe real events and should NOT be taken to accurately portray any real entity mentioned. In keeping with its fictional nature, the events and activities described in the story may not be legal, ethical or safe. This site does NOT endorse or recommend their enactment.
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Sorry that it isn’t on Red Nose Day proper (we can’t all be perfect, right?) After this special, I will be stopping GYOB for a few weeks, and having a bit of a break due to a lot of stuff going on, and when it’s back I may still have stuff going on, so it could be that the episodes happen a little less.
The next episode will be along in a few weeks, and may be a non-vote one, as I had a great suggestion from TellyGunge, which I teased at the end of the story.
Voting stories will be returning though after that first episode. I have a few suggestions to chase up and decide on, but of course if there is a celebrity you feel deserves to be on GYOB, don’t hesitate to mention them!
Oh, and a quick thank you to all of those who have enjoyed and supported the New GYOB, I appreciate all the nice comments! – MsM
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Dave walked out holding his hands up and egging on the audience to cheer. He was wearing a white shirt that had large red polkadots, and of course a Red Nose to celebrate the occasion. Even though Red Nose Day was technically over, the fundraising still was going on in places around the country, and on this Get Your Own Back episode, it was no exception, as Dave made clear.
“Hello there! And welcome to a very, very special edition of Get Your Own Back. Now before anything else, thank you to all of you at home for voting on which two ladies you wanted to see back here. We got a great amount of votes and we raised a lot of money…£9,558 – yeah, that deserves a round of applause yeah!”
The excitement for this episode seemed to be high, and a good number of votes had been cast, with one or two of the ladies being neck and neck. The votes had helped raise money and the producers were pleased with the amount of advertising and chatter put out by fans for the show. A VT of all of those ladies who had been gunged flashed onto the screens.
“Right well this series has been incredible, especially these celebrity episodes, with the likes of Fearne Cotton, Sheridan Smith and Jenna-Louise Coleman, all meeting a very yucky end! But the ladies who had escaped clean hadn’t exactly kept their promises to…well, keep clean - as in they continued to be the horrid grown ups they really are, and two ladies in particular really made you mad! So lets welcome back Ashleigh for the yellows, and Anne, who is this time playing on the blue team!”
Both girls walked through the doors, feeling confident as they had been on the show once before now. Ashleigh had brown hair and Anne had short ginger hair. Both stopped and smiled as Dave walked in. He then gave them both a Red Nose which they wore, to keep up with the occasion.
“Alright welcome back girls, Ashleigh, we will start with you. Now who was it you brought on last time and why?”
“Well last time, I brought on my mums best friend Holly Willoughby if you remember. She is pretty much an evil villainess, she always picked on me when she was visiting, and made sure I got grounded for absolutely nothing.”
“Ah I do remember, Fearne Cotton became the one who ended up in the slop however wasn’t she? Well what’s happened since then?”
“Ugh. Holly has become even more evil. Now she is playing pranks on top of being pure evil. Like, she puts water buckets above the doors, she makes flour fall out of cupboards and onto me – I mean how!? She’s my friends mum, not my sister! The worst thing though, is now she doesn’t pretend my room smells anymore, she makes it so it smells and she has a reason to embarrass me more. I think she uses some stink bombs or something, either way it’s gross. I think it is all revenge for me bringing her here.”
Dave shook is head and looked genuinely sorry for Ashleigh.
“Well the public voted, and you have a second chance to get her in the gunge at the end maybe, so in you come Mrs. Willoughby!”
The camera faced Holly who came in and stood next to Dave. She had her hair once again in luxurious looking curls coming down to her shoulders, wanting to look her best for a charity themed episode. She wore a yellow GYOB top like last time which once again showed her chest off quite visibly, and like last time she had decided on wearing shorts. This meant her cleanly shaven legs were on full display, and to anyone at home, what a display it must have been. She laughed a little and looked at Dave, half nodding as a sign of meeting him once again. The audience continued to boo quite viciously and finally died down so that Dave could hear himself.
“Holly! Welcome back to the show.”
“I would say thanks for having me back but…”
The audience chuckled at this, and Dave himself laughed.
“Is a bit of a tricky one to thank…Right well Holly, you were one of the ladies voted to be back. Now, after the fate of your good friend Fearne, do you really think it was wise to be more even more evil to Ashleigh?”
“Well I didn’t think I would be back! And I don’t think it is very fair, I mean I won. End of!”
Dave raised his eyebrows and asked the audience if they thought it was fair that Holly could potentially be gunged due to being back a second time. The roar was thunderous and Holly went pink, as she had done last time and covered her face a little. The truth was, she was happy to come back to support Comic Relief, but as soon as she had put the phone down, she remembered how much Fearne had described the gunge. The sticky sensation between her toes, the coldness of the stuff seeping in around her private parts, and how matted and gunky her hair had been. Not to mention the fact that Fearne was still smelling of the stuff a few days later at The Wammies 2012 that Holly had presented, and she realised something that made her go a little more pink.
‘In fact I teased her so much about her wiff that day, she would love the chance to say the same. Oh please, if I lose today I won’t hear the end of it from her, especially seeing as I made such a big thing out of winning that day.’
“Alright then, seems to our audience it is very fair that you are back here Holly. Right then, Anne, who did you bring for a gunging last time?”
“My camera loving sister, Karen Gillan. She was obsessed with posing so much, she really was. She also used to take me out to help her with her photo shoots, and at home she never even let me have 5 minutes to myself at all.”
“Ah right I see, so since then has she relented?”
“No way she hasn’t! She has a got a whole lot worse! She seemed pretty annoyed I brought her onto the show and so now she is making me be the poser. Only problem is, is that now she is buying stupid and embarrassing outfits for me to have to wear. She keeps signing me up for modelling events and she makes sure I get there and appear in them. Seriously she has got a whole lot worse.”
“Deary me, come in here Karen, come on!”
The camera turned to Karen Gillan, looking as beautiful as usual. She walked in, again like on the first show, stylishly like a model. She had decided to go for wearing leggings again, which hugged her legs and rear nicely. Her blue GYOB top fit nicely around her like the yellow one had last time. Unlike last time, when she had her hair long, she had decided to do it up in a bun this time, although judging by Sammy Winwards previous dunking, it might not stay like that if she was to be gunged too. Like Holly, Karen agreed as soon as she heard it was for charity, both because it was good publicity, and because she was the former star of the BBCs flagship Sci-Fi drama. It wasn’t in a contract, but in some respects she had a duty to show up for a Comic Relief themed episode, and of course the money from the vote was going to a good cause. But she also agreed due to last time actually having a lot of fun. She still didn’t want to end up in the gunge obviously, but she found the whole show enjoyable to participate in last time. Jenna had told her after the show that being gunged wasn’t so bad and in some ways a really nice experience bar the smell; but then again Jenna was a more outgoing person, Karen wasn’t when it came to a tank fully of gooey, smelly gunge. Karen stood next to her sister and smiled at Dave.
“Karen, why on earth are you making your sisters life even more of a misery?”
“Er, I don’t know Dave let me think…oh yeah, EMBARASSING ME IN FRONT OF THE NATION! Alright I didn’t get gunged in the end, but so many people wanted to see me go into that gunge. I’m glad I didn’t because Jenna ended up in a right disgusting state. In fact that was at least a plus to Anne bringing me on last time, I got to enjoy that with a ringside seat -”
“Woah, hey! That’s my line there Karen, don’t you go stealing it!”
The audience laughed a little, liking Daves banter, and laughed again as Karen pulled a face and mimicked Dave, which made Anne, Ashleigh and Holly all laugh considering Dave was being outsmarted on his own show. Indirectly Karen joking around in that fashion gave a mock sense of being mad to be brought back.
“Well, this time for both of our ladies, there is no advantage really of coming onto the show, just the pure humiliation of losing when they thought they had escaped clean last time! Both Ashleigh and Anne will once again be trying to get as many points as they can, and both Holly and Karen will again be trying to stop them. Why? Because at the end of the show one of our young contestants will get a second chance to throw their adult into the gunge. Now with this being Comic Relief, and both of our ladies not even relenting in their ways, we have for the end of the series – the nastiest, muckiest, smelliest, gooeyist…well it’s everything bad for these two put it that way!”
A camera cut to the GYOB gunge quickly. It hadn’t got any theme this week in terms of colour, because it literally was multi-coloured. There was dabs of blue, spatterings of yellow, trickles of red. A murky greenish brown was the most prominent colour in the gunge amongst the other colours and it had something written on the gunge, as well as a very detailed looking gunge-painted Red Nose to keep the Comic Relief feel, but the camera cut away as usual before it could be fully taken in, and Dave declared the games begin.
The ident came off and Dave was standing in the middle of an obstacle course, which had dips in with some slime. Around him where yellow and blue blocks. Behind him, both Anne and Ashleigh were standing next to two rectangular holes, and behind them in two glass perplex boxes were Holly and Karen. Above both of them was a tank of bright red gunge. Holly was looking up at it once or twice and smiling, this not being her first encounter with glass perplex boxes, and Karen was looking ready for a fight it seemed. Both had a bucket next to them in the tanks, full of some tennis sized white balls, and both grabbed one as Dave spoke.
“Alright then it’s time for our first game, and it is a messy one! What Ashleigh and Anne have to do is go around this course and get as many of their coloured bricks as possible and place them here in these slots. Both have to try and make the GYOB logo on their walls, but behind me here in our tanks are Mrs. Willoughby and Mrs. Gillan, who will be doing their best to knock down the walls! It is 10 points a brick and whichever contestant can complete the wall the most at the end of the round will give one of our ladies back here a very red makeover! 3, 2, 1, go!”
Both Ashleigh and Anne ran out into the course, aiming to be the first to get a brick on their wall, but both ended up being very tied. Anne suffered a ball to the head from her sister, who looked very determined to do good on this show like last time, whilst Holly was throwing her balls left right and center, one of them even hitting Anne. Both girls ran out again into the course, this time Anne having the upper hand as Ashleigh slipped in a slime dip. She placed her brick onto the wall slot and did the same with the next time, both times being before Ashleigh, but Karen managed to knock it down, and Anne spent time rebuilding it. Holly was still flinging balls all over the place, and Karen was now missing the wall with every throw. Both girls got a couple more bricks to their walls, but to Ashleigh’s annoyance, Holly finally got a ball on target, knocking the wall right down just as the countdown began, and it was useless to try and rebuild the wall now.
Karen had already noticed and resigned to her fate, holding her hands behind her head and facing down to look at her, for now, clean feet. A few moments later and a stream of thick red gunge collided with her head, a lot of it flinging outward from the box. She could help but let out a scream as it happened, and she quickly removed her hands from the back of her head, to her face as the deluge managed to slop down over the front of her. She sat straight and kept her face covered as the gunge slowly stopped flowing and shook her head a little bit. The gunge had drenched her hair, even though it was in a bun, and she could feel the gunge in between her toes. She patted the pool of goo quickly with them and cringed a little bit at the coldness, and she felt herself going red as she began to pay attention and heard the laughter from around the studio, including Holly and Dave. Karen took away her hands from her face, showing that some of the gunge had trickled down to cover it a little bit, and she wiped it away as Dave spoke.
“I tell you what, that was a brilliant shower to watch right there, how do you feel Karen?”
“Cold. Slimey. HUMILIATED.”
“That’s what we like to hear! Hahaha! Right well, Ashleigh we will start with your wall here…you have, 1, 2, 3, 4 blocks still standing, good score 40 points! And Anne let’s count yours…1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6…well done there, 60 points! So as the scores stand like I just said, Ashleigh has 40 points but Anne is in the lead with 60!”
Karen shivered a tiny bit, part from the cold of the goo which was now around her toes, and even seeping through her leggings a little bit, and part from the fact that the games had gotten off to in her little sisters favour. She quickly touched her hair, which was dripping with gunk and gave a very small whimper to herself.
“And as for you karen, red I must say suits you well!”
The image of a gunge-soaked Karen Gillan changed and suddenly Dave was standing in front of what seemed to look like some sort of see-saw. On both ends were Holly and Ashleigh. Ashleigh was sitting on a chair fixed to the contraption, but Holly was stood in what seemed to be a large red nose, wearing a helmet of red also to match the nose she was in. She felt a little embarrassed to be a red nose in all honesty, but smiled anyway as Dave explained the game.
“Right then, we have a very Comic Relief themed game here as Holly, our big red nose is to start running, pulling this big contraption with her. but on the other and we have Ashleigh, who will be throwing red noses of all things, into the large buckets layered in a circle. 10 points for each red nose in a bucket at the end of the game! 3, 2, 1, GO!”
Holly began to run, and run fast. Within seconds the large frame was already spinnig at a considerable rate, and Ashleigh had failed to get 2 red noses in the buckets. Holly could feel the weight and knew that soon fatigue would get to her, and make it easy for Ashleigh, but she ploughed on anyway, whilst Ashleigh got a few red noses in or so. The audience were cheering her younger counterpart on, and whilst pushing and running, Holly could imagine that her family and friends would be enjoying this. Before she knew it, the audience had began to count down, and she was relieved to hear the klaxon go, and slowly stopped as Dave came running in.
“Holly, you weren’t pushing that hard! What was you doing daydreaming or something? Blimey, right well thats good news for you Ashleigh, let’s just count this bucket here…1, 2…right to the next one over here…3, 4, 5….next one, I really need to shape up!…none in this one….and finally, 6. Well done there Ashleigh, 60 points!”
It cut to show the same set up, with Karen now inside the red nose and her sister sitting in the chair ready with the bucket. As soon as the klaxon went, Karen pushed as hard as possible. She was determined to do well after being gunged in the last game.
‘Come on, come on….’
Anne was doing ok, but had only got in around 2 red noses into the buckets, as her sister was doing a very god job on keeping the contraption swinging around fast. She missed again and quickly prepared for a shot at the next bucket, and this time managed to get it in. She stole a quick look at Karen, and it was obvious that today she didn’t want to be going down into the gunge at the end. She had heard her exclaim to Holly whilst talking before show how actually horrible it was since the last time either of them had been on. Anne smiled at this thought but missed the last bucket at the end of the countdown.
“Stop! Stop! Karen, woah! Woah! That was some great pushing, I didn’t think I would be able to stop you then! Unbelievable. Right well, lets have a count of these noses in the buckets, 1…next one….2, 3…over here…none in this one….so much running, wow, right…and none in this one. Good try there Anne, 30 points! Right, I just need to catch my breath after counting all of those noses, but before that lets have a look at those scores as they stand!”
A screen came on and showed Anne as having 90 points, but taking the lead now was Ashleigh with 100. Both girls were cheering in their boxes as the screen cut to Dave standing with both Karen and Holly, and a pie booth just behind.
“Alright you lot, alright. Right now this is the part of the show in which we call Goo Who, which we find out who out of these two celebrities, Holly or Karen, does the audience want to be gunged at the end of the show. Now usually we give both ladies a time to explain to the audience why they don’t want to be gunged, BUT, today we are changing the rules a little bit. See both had their chance last time, and so what we did was ask the audience after the first round to cast votes secretly, on seeing the reasons given on the respected shows last time. And one of you were voted pretty high and will be going in the booth behind me, were every pie that hits you in the face, 10 points will be added onto your counterparts score. In other words, whoever goes in this booth behind me will have more of a chance going in the gunge possibly. But who won that vote? Oh Jenna can you please come out here with your envelope!”
Karen froze. She looked to were Dave was smiling and felt herself starting once again to go pink. Her replacement on Doctor Who walked toward them with an envelope and had a glint in her eye. Karen sighed realising that the envelope wasn’t even needed. Jenna stopped next to Karen and smiled at her, and she returned it weakly. She wasn’t to embarrassed by the fact that she would be pied, but more was fearful that she knew what also might be coming next.
“Hello Karen, hello again Dave. And nice to meet you Holly! Just going to say big fan, I used to watch you sometimes back on Ministry of -”
“Jenna, we haven’t got all day, chit chat later – if Holly isn’t waist deep in foul muck that is. Let’s quickly see, you were gunged on the episode in which you and Karen appeared, how was that for you and have you been a good sister since?”
“I think the only thing I can say it was very, very smelly. Like seriously. And embarrassing too. Arthur Darvill decided to keep his distance from me after that due to the lingering wiff. But I think the worst thing is, it taught me a good lesson, and so at home I have been a lot nicer to Faye. I don’t treat her like my slave anymore.”
“I also heard that after making your sister give your feet a lot of pampering, you now have to pamper her feet these days, all due to being gunged on here, is that right?”
Jenna smiled at Dave, almost threateningly in a way and quickly looked at Karen.
“So anyway, I am here today, invited by Dave to announce that Karen was the once who was voted most wanted to go in the gunge!”
‘Not again.’
Dave gestured for Karen to move into her position, and so she did. She couldn’t believe that in two shows she was the one who was more preferred to go in. But given her time on Doctor Who, it was predictable. She stuck her head in the hole and then realised something with shock and dismay.
‘Oh no, you are kidding me right? You’re not throwing this time too?’
Dave had moved Holly to the side and Jenna was standing at the table with the pies, looking at Karen with a deep smugness and air of satisfaction.
“You see we thought we would let Jenna do her worst this time seeing as she suffered the dunking on the show with you and her Karen. Plus something tells me she is really happy to have this chance yet again. And due to Holly’s seemingly bad throwing, we thought it necessary Ready Jenna? Go and throw!”
Karen saw the pie flying toward her in slow motion, it had a crust base and was filled with custard and sprayed with cream. It also had a cherry on, which she guessed could be because of red nose day. Before the pie had even hit her though, she was already going deeply red. The pie finally made contact with her as she screwed up her face, the custard exploding across her and some of the cream dripping down. She licked a little bit of the custard but was hit again with another pie. This one was different, and as the crust ebbed away, she could smell a bit of a pungent smell from this one. She decided she wouldn’t lick her lips at all for anymore of the incoming pies.
“And take this one too, for hours of cleaning from my hair!”
Jenna was in her element, and launched a third well aimed pie at Karen, who wasn’t saying much and keeping her face visibly scrunched up and braced behind the custard and cream. Ever since her very messy gunging, she had been subjected to a lot of tweets, articles and even some fanfics online, showing or describing her unfortunate end. She didn’t hate Karen at all of course, and was good friends with her. But the way Karen had been after the show last time, being very smug and giggling at Jenna every time she saw or spoke to her, she would do anything to help Anne out as much as possible. She launched another pie which once again was a direct hit.
‘Besides, seeing the gunge earlier really drummed home the fact for Karen that it is a whole lot worse this time, and it really has been lying there for a few days under those lights – oh if she goes in it will be perfect!’
Jenna picked up one more pie but finally missed, sailing past the board as the klaxon ended the game, and she shrugged being happy anyway as Dave came to her side. Karen was now smiling and seemed to have in the end enjoyed it a little bit, despite not liking it during the throwing, and she came out to join Holly and Jenna and Dave.
“Jenna your marksmanship is superb I have to say! You managed to splatter Karen with 4 pies, and so 40 points will be added to Annes score! Karen are you ok there?”
“I think so. Nothing wrong with a few pies I guess, but Jenna, um, come here just -”
Karen came out and didn’t stop next to Dave but rather walked past him and Holly who looked shocked and lurched at Jenna , threw her arms around her, and gave her a kiss on her cheek. Of course whilst doing this, a lot of cream and custard was planted against Jenna’s right cheek. Karen then gave her a quick kiss on her lips too, making sure enough of the cream was covering Jenna’s face too – much to the latter’s giggling and complaining. To anyone watching of course though, it showed that they showed a great friendship, and Dave smiled, half in enjoyment but also because he liked how the two good friends were having fun on his show.
“I really did miss times like this, big smiles and togetherness.”
The scene cut to a scoreboard showing both of the contestants, Ashleigh still on 100, but now leading was Anne with 130 points in total. Both girls cheered once again in their boxes. It cut off to show Dave standing in between both Ashleigh and Anne, and at the far sides, Holly and Karen were dressed up in mock cyclist outfits and were both on exercise bikes.
“It’s the game before the gunge, and it’s a fun one here at Get Your Own Back. Both Ashleigh and Anne have to run across theses roads toward the box at the other side where a load of gold counters are sitting, and then bring them back along the road and deposit them into their boxes. But it won’t be easy as we have both Holly, and Karen over there on these bikes, and the faster they peddle, the faster their road will go making it harder for either Ashleigh or Anne. I think you should be aiming to peddle as fast as you possibly can, because right now it doesn’t look too good for you! Alright, all set, 3, 2, 1, go!”
Karen ducked her head and began to peddle quite fast, still showing determination in this episode, and this time Holly was keeping the pace too. Both ladies peddled fast and made it difficult for Ashleigh and Anne the first few times, both girls nearly tripping on on the roads. Anne was slightly ahead of Ashleigh, already running across the road whilst Ashleigh was still picking up a counter. Karen seemed to have noticed this and once more ducked her head down peddling faster. Holly did the same but it was Anne who helped on this as she slipped on the road. Ashleigh powered ahead of her rival and got another counter in before Anne, who was now seemingly shaken by falling. The audience had started the countdown and Holly grimaced slightly.
“She got ANOTHER one in? Oh for hells sake -”
The klaxon went and both Holly and Karen looked out of breath, and Holly collapsed onto the handlebars, half laughing and breathed heavily. Karen looked worn out but kept sat up and put her hands on her hips as Dave came running in.
“Both of thee ladies, both of them…they do not want to go anywhere near that gunge, I tell you. I have to say well done, you were both peddling pretty fast there, but let’s have a look first at Ashleighs box…1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7…70 points well done! Alright Anne, you had a bit of trouble there but let’s have a look…1, 2, 3, 4…Only 40 points there but well done anyway!”
Ashleigh cheered, happy that she was now level with Anne. She was really happy to find herself coming back to GYOB with Holly, but felt in the games today that she wasn’t doing well. It was a relief to have finally done good enough in the last round, and a glimmer of hope that it could be who Holly would soon get what was coming to her. She stole a glance at her mothers friend who smiled back nicely, but behind the smile she knew Holly wasn’t going to be too pleased with the result, and that made her smile a little.
The scene changed to show Dave standing with both Ashleigh and Anne, who were both smiling. Anne was slightly annoyed that she had slipped up in the game and allowed the scores to be level now, as just like Ashleigh, she was happy to be back and getting a second chance. Karen was a bit too smug after the show last time and she wasn’t exaggerating when she had said at the start about her sister; Karen really had gotten used to making her wear silly outfits, and she was determined to do well in the gunk dunk finale.
“Well here we are at the final hurdle, and what a yucky hurdle it is. Who will get the chance to finally get their own back? Ashleigh or Anne, and who will be going into the most disgusting slop we have ever had on the show, even since the older shows? There’s only one way to find out as we go toward, the gunk dunk!”
Dave led Ashleigh and Anne into the smoke behind and it was replaced with a slow pan up of the gunge. Like at the start, it had nearly every colour imaginable in, but it all overall made it look mostly a sickly looking murky greenish brown. The usual white writing was accompanied by a detailed, gunge painted red nose, and the words read out, “Land in something SMELLY for money”, and below that in smaller white gunge it read, “Dunk by 14/3/13″, obviously mocking a use by date with an old date to show the gunge having ‘gone off’. But the little ‘dunk by’ date had some truth as the gunge had been left for around three days in it’s current state, as the producers really felt a good punishment was needed. It was of course checked and rechecked each day, and tested to make sure it was safe enough to use. Much of it had hardly moved and was extremely dense, as one of the producers had stuck her hand in and pulled it out, revealing it to drip quite slowly and sticky like from her hand. The studio lights had been turned on full power for all three days and the gunge had been left mostly undisturbed, congealing and building up a rancid smell, making the words fully truthful.
“This is going to be very bad. Surely there must be some sort of regulation against it…”
Karen knew there wasn’t. The producers were actually nice people and had thoroughly explained the measures and agreements they had gone through to make the gunge safe and allowable for television viewing. She looked down past her leggings at the stuff and noted how thick it seemed to be on the surface. She had been sat for 10 minutes above it now and was finding it hard to ignore the smell wafting up from the gunge. Not only that, but it looked incredibly sticky, as well as slimey and still very thick at the same time. She tried to think of how they achieved this, hoping it would help block out the thought of ending up in it later on.
Holly looked down at the gunge below. She was pretty much thinking similar to what Karen was, and remembered how last time she had been begging for mercy whilst sitting above the gunge, but this time it looked more vile and more sickly. She could smell it from where she was, and when she looked down, she could tell parts of it had thickened quite a lot. She scrunched up her toes a tiny bit and then back and rubbed the top of her knees thinking to herself.
“I shouldn’t have agreed to this. This is worse than the days back on MoM…”
Dave stopped at the podium and gave a big smile to both ladies.
“Here we are at the final Gunk Dunk of the series with our two ladies, Holly and Karen. Now this gunge down here has been left to settle for the last 3 days or so and believe me, it is incredibly smelly, and absolutely thick and slimy down there. Oh yes it is the worst it has ever been and one of these two will be going down into it. Holly, what do you think of the gunge below you?”
“It’s a lot worse than last time. A lot more awful looking…”
“That’s right it is a lot worse, but Karen you must be happy you aren’t moving up any notches just yet?”
“Yeap, Im hoping to be staying right here at the bottom of this ramp Dave.”
Both ladies did seem a little nervous to be there, but Karen at least wasn’t as bothered as last time, at least not yet. She had been messed up a couple of times during the show now already. Holly on the other hand had been fairly quiet during the games, mostly because she didn’t want to jinx anything at all. Both ladies were a bit fixed on the gunge to realise Dave had already started with the questions.
“What is the name of the city that is the capital of Germany? Straight away Ashleigh!”
Holly knew Ashleigh would get it right, and sure enough she had answered with Berlin. Her chair rose up and Holly let out a small, quiet sigh as it did. She listened carefully to the next question as she thought to herself about the gunge below. She quickly shivered from the thought of it below, and gave her toes a quick wriggle just as Dave asked what 2 x 4 was.
“Is it 8?”
“8 is correct, well done there Anne, what do we do with her sister?”
Karen smiled weakly as her chair rose up one notch and the audience played along with their ‘oooo’. She also played along with an ‘ooo’ quietly and then she looked over at her sister who seemed to pleased with answering, and she closed her eyes for a second in dread as the blue buzzer went off again to Daves question of which planet was third from the sun.
“Earth?”
“It is Earth, well done again Anne, what do we do again?”
Karens chair rose further from the slop and to the second notch. She couldn’t help but give a small smile, and looked at Anne giving her a half threatening look and shook her head, indicating mock terror as Dave spoke again.
“What liquid do Vampires like to drink, juice, blood, milk or coff – Oh straight away Ashleigh!”
“Blood!”
‘Ugh, they make the questions so easy.’
“Blood is the right answer, up you go Holly!”
Dave smiled at Holly as her chair rose up again and away from the gunge. Karen so far seemed to be enjoying the tension, but Holly was not. In some ways she was thankful that the smell was weakening due to being further away, but she sincerely hope that she wouldn’t be going up any further. She didn’t go pink as usual right at this stage however, and instead looked down at her bare legs and her feet. She had cleanly shaven them the night before, and painted her toes with red nail polish for the Comic Relief tie in. They felt a little cold to her as she listened to Dave, peeking past them down toward the gunge.
“What is traditionally ate at a Christmas dinner – Anne!”
“Turkey!”
As Dave nodded, Karen once agan closed her eyes and this time ducked her head down and smiled in mild embarrassment She shook her head as her chair moved upward and she could somehow feel Anne looking at her and smiling. She stopped at the 3rd notch and looked up at Dave who was smiling.
“You alright there Karen?”
“I think so Dave, I am at this notch anyway.”
‘Hopefully this is as high as I will go.’
Holly looked over at Karen, who of course the audience mostly wanted to see go in the gunge. She was on the 3rd notch, and hopefully soon to be going on the 4th. She smiled at the odds in her favour but it was quickly dashed as the yellow ring went again. Dave had asked where in the world would you find a shark, to which Ashleigh had answered the sea. At this Holly once again like in the last show spoke out from nerves on the third notch as it stopped her there.
“Come on that was too easy! This isn’t fair I swear, these are too easy these questions!”
“I’m carrying on Holly, I’m carrying on. This next one should be a good one, it’s character one. What is the name of Postman Pats trusty cat?”
The yellow buzzer went again and Holly let out an audible sigh. Now she was starting to go slightly pink. She realised now fully just how horrible the stuff below her was, and tapped her toes in nervousness. And as Ashleigh’s answer of Jess was declared right, she rested her head on her hands, elbows on her knees as her chair rose up, clearly looking to everyone that she was not enjoying this. Last time had been slightly embarrassing this time it was full on humiliating and she was more reluctant this time round to be here. She blurted out without warning to her friends daughter.
“Ashleigh please. I don’t mean to be mean, please this isn’t nice, I don’t deserve this.”
“OK OK, Holly settle down.”
“I don’t deserve this, I don’t deserve this…Just look at that stuff, it is completely horrid down there -”
Dave ignored Holly’s continued muttering and half laughed before reading out the next question. As he did Karen thought to herself and started to think all over agan everything Jenna had said about the gunge. How cold it was, the stench sticking around…but despite all that, she was feeling more used to being here suddenly. She realised it was horrible yes, but also a bit of fun and would make her sister happy. Besides she wanted something reflect back on and think ‘I stuck through it’. Holly didn’t seem to have that attitude, and looked like she didn’t want her more recent presenting persona tarnished by a large amount of muck. Karen did think to herself though that if she could avoid it, she would, but if the powers that be meant she would be going in, then she would play along.
“Oh, Anne!”
“Ice cream?”
“That’s right Ben & Jerry’s is an ice cream product – what do we do?”
The audience answered and some laughed as Karen was reduced to a fit of nervous giggles as her chair came to a stop at the same height as Holly’s had. Both ladies were on notch 4. Karen removed her hands and looked down at the gunge, almost as if bracing for it. Holly looked at it too but looked a little more tense than Karen did. She shook her head shortly for a second and thought to herself, pleading to herself.
‘Come on Anne. I am not going down there today.‘
“It’s neck and neck! Blimey this is nail biting, one of these ladies will be going for a very revolting drop, who’s it going to be?”
Dave started to read out the question and Holly shuffled her feet nervously, and then rested her hands in her lap, looking around at both Karen and Dave, and trying to ignore Ashleigh’s anticipation. Karen on the other hand had decided to grab the seat and didn’t take her eyes off of the gunge below, waiting for the moment where Anne could buzz in first and thinking to herself more and more.
‘It’s got some sort of thickening layer on that side due to it being left and I can still smell it from up here. Ugh, it won’t be pleasant.”
Karen jolted and looked at her younger sister in shock. Her buzzer had just gone off as Dave finished his question, and suddenly Karen started to get a knot in her stomach realising this was it, she watched with her eyes growing wide a little. She was open to being gunged but she didn’t want it to happen.
“Is it the Taj Mahal?”
Karen closed her eyes and felt the blood rush to her face, highly embarrassed and screwed up her face, she heard some of the audience making a noise and Dave too was talking. She missed the question, but she guessed what famous landmark it was in India. She couldn’t bear to look at her smug sister, and suddenly she could smell the gunge a whole lot more, realising she was ending up in it soon.
‘Oh no.’
“Nope I’m afraid not, Ashleigh any ideas on where the pope lives?”
Karen was confused and opened her eyes. Anne had got it wrong, and Dave had passed the question over to Ashleigh, much to Holly’s horror.
“Is it the Vatican?”
“NO! No that isn’t fair you can’t ask her either surely – THIS ISN’T HOW IT WORKS!”
“Yes it is, oh yes – haha, oh my – she knows what this means and so do you…- she isn’t happy – What do we do with Holly everybody!”
“NO!”
The audience answered and Holly Willoughby, despite her complaining and obvious horror at this moved up the ramp to the top, setting off the alarm bells and causing the audience to cheer deafeningly. Karen was clapping now and smiling, enjoying her rivals shock having gotten over the confusion, and her sister was watching and looked disheartened but couldn’t help buy smile as everyone watched and laughed at Holly’s protests. Holly was pointing at Ashleigh, then to Dave, and then back to Ashleigh. She was shaking her head constantly and to Ashleigh, she looked like a teenager pulling a strop, and laughed out loud at this thought.
“Holly -”
“NO! NO!”
“Holly, you’re at the top there, no protesting will help you I’m afraid…just stay, right, there! Hahaha!”
“No this isn’t fair, NO! …No…”
Holly couldn’t think of anything else to say as it slowly sank in. She took one look at Ashleigh and felt her cheeks go very pink. She looked down at the gunge, laying perfectly still and not disturbed. She closed her eyes and put her face in her hands in disbelief. She may have been gunged in her years of television before, but not to this extent.
“Ughh, NO! Oh no.”
“Karen, how do you feel, you escaped clean - again! You must be relieved right?”
“Yeap, definitely Dave. I didn’t want my hair to get all messy really, and plus it won’t give Jenna the satisfaction either. She will always be the loser out of us two, and that makes me so grateful, but thank you for having me once again. It was fun, and Anne, I swear from now on I will be much nicer. Love you little sis!”
“Anne have you had a nice time being back?”
“I have, and love you too big sis!”
Holly barely heard a word of all of this. She continued to keep her face in her hands whilst Dave had spoke to Anne. Holly gave another audible ‘Ugh’ as Dave looked at her grinning. All she could think about was Fearne and how she wouldn’t be hearing the end of this for a long time, due to the gunge being a lot worse. She wished she had lost the first show, at least it would have been a lot nicer than this gunge. Comic Relief or not she couldn’t help but regret agreeing to return and couldn’t get used to the fact that things were about to be very bad.
“But Holly. Holly Willoughby. I think you know what is about to happen next, you have been here before more or less and you watched Fearne go through it, but to be honest, you’re going to be going through a lot worse. It’s colder, stickier and even more gooey than ever before, and it has even more of a pong than Fearne’s feet when covered in the first gunk dunk gunge! Hahaha!”
“No.”
“Yes!”
“NO!”
“YES! Yes you are going down girl, you are going down! Hahaha, I tell you what she isn’t looking forward to this is she? We like that! Deary me…but Ashleigh. Ashleigh today is a very good day for you, and really bad for her, because things are about to get very horrible for her now.”
Holly had removed her hands from her face and was pulling a really unhappy face. Her feet were dangling at the edge of the seat, he toes curling over the edge fully and she had shuffled her legs right together, placing her hands on her smooth, soft knees, her fingers digging in a little as she listened to Dave, who was dragging out his small speech to humiliate Holly good and proper. It was working.
“Yes, she never changed her ways and now you have the chance to teach her one very awful lesson. And – oh hang on a moment, HELLO FEARNE!”
“Fearne!? You have got to be joking – OH NO WAY, NO! YOU CAN’T DO THIS!”
Out of nowhere, Fearne was quickly running up the steps toward Ashleigh. Both her and Jenna were invited of course, for the Goo Who pie booth, and were both told to help with the pulling of the lever if their former rival was to go in. She stopped behind Ashleigh and gave a look of true happiness and smugness as she looked up at Holly on the ramp. Her friend was to be going into tank which was far worse than what she was, and from now on it would be Fearne teasing Holly about the smell lingering around her and constantly referring back to this. She put her hands on Ashleigh’s shoulders and congratulated her quickly.
“Hello Dave, I hope you don’t mind if I help with this and get the best view in the house? Holly has been way too smug and teasing me up until now, so in a way surely I can get my own back too?”
“Oh my God I can’t believe this. I really cannot believe this. Why on earth is she here, honestly?”
“Oh go on then – the more embarrassing for Holly the better!”
“Oh no please – Fearne please -”
“There is one very mucky, sticky, smelly gunge waiting down there, so now it is time to make Mrs Holly Willoughby the muckiest, stickiest and the very smelliest person who has ever been on television – Ashleigh, and Fearne – PULL THAT LEVER, THROW HER INTO THIS FILTHY PIT, AND GET YOUR OWN BACK! Send her down, do it, do it, do it!”
Ashleigh smiled and looked up at Holly, not pulling the lever and just enjoying the moment, as Fearne pointed and made faces. Holly was shaking her head in embarrassment and Ashleigh gripped the lever, Fearne placing her hand over Ashleigh’s on it.
“Don’t you dare, please don’t, please don’t – no, NO!”
“Countdown Ashleigh?”
“THREE, TWO, ONE – BYE BYE HOLLY!”
Ashleigh and Fearne cheered as they both pulled back the lever. Fearne yet out a huge cheer and was jumping on the spot, with Ashleigh cheering also. The audience went ballistic as Holly screamed quickly in defiance, and then screwed up her face to one of the purest disgust and complete humiliation, her mouth downturned frumpily in deep apprehension. She huddled up slightly, keeping her hands on her knees and squeezing her legs together. Her chair moved down the ramp, but not as whizzing fast as usual, instead it went half the speed, still considerable, but at the same time, enough to take in the TV presenters hilarious expression. An enormous amount of gunge, the same colours as the ones in the tank, fell out of nowhere and Holly descended down and into the thick stream coming from above, gunge spraying out to the sides, all the way in front and even behind – splashing Dave a little in the process, who simply laughed along with everyone else at the podiums. There was another scream and Holly had tried to cover her nose up to stop the smell, her eyes still screwed up, but her mouth wide open as lurched forward, bursting from the huge amount of streaming gunge and halfway across the tank until she was flung and submerged, still screaming, right into the depths of the vat. It caused an almighty splash, the wave sloshing right out from the tank in front and swashing all around in the gunge.
The audience half screamed and laughed with a thunderous sound. The force of the fling at the bottom of the ramp must have increased, and in the middle of the crashing waves around the tank pair of completely gunge coated legs were sticking out and up into the air shining a tiny bit from the gunge, globs of goo dripping from the gunge soaked feet. They stuck out from the gunge and wriggled a little before falling forward hitting the surface and floating there for a second, the toes wriggling a little whilst coated, before sinking below. Up on the podiums, Ashleigh and Fearne were giving a high five, and cheering together, Dave was smiling wider than he ever had on the show before, clapping too. Anne was in a fit of laughter, whilst Karen was clapping and smiling, curling her toes a little bit and trying to keep any of the gunge from hitting her. The audience continued to cheer and suddenly the gunge swashed once more as a very mucky blob of goo came up. Holly was completely plastered, her hair was saturated with gunge, some of it lumping in her hair. Her arms were glazed with all the colours of the gunge, and as she rose them from the surface of the gunk, strings of the stuff dripped from them. She made it toward the front of the tank, looking like she wanted to get out, but was engulfed in another huge deluge of multicoloured muck from above which domed out and completely overed her once more. She seemed to lose her footing as suddenly she dropped vertically downward, only the top of her head more or less showing under the torrent of goo. Dave finally started to speak, just as she raised herself out again and moved backward a little bit, half slouched in the gunge in a way.
“That. That ladies and gentleman…that was -”
“Aghhhhh – Aghhhh – Uckk -”
Dave collapsed into a fit of laughter as Holly was drenched from above yet again, screaming in the process and objecting loudly to it. She was now stood up fully in the gunge and was trying to cover her head. The attempt was futile though as gunge slopped down past her hands and down her gunge covered face. Her mouth was wide open in bewilderment and repulsion, her eyes were still closed. He attempted to talk once again as the stream thinned, Holly lowering herself now so that just her head was above the surface. It was screwed back up into disgust and she half seemed to have accepted defeat, letting the incredibly pungent goo spatter her and drip down her face.
“Incredible. That was incredible. Really it was…what a way to celebrate Comic Relief. Just wow! Our very mucky, slimy gunge now has a very mucky, slimy celebrity in it! Ashleigh, and Fearne – both of you how do you feel?”
“I feel excellent, thank you!”
“And I feel like justice has been done. And I have to thank you a lot Dave. I forgive you for my gunging because you have gone out of your way to give Holly the most disgusting and messy gunging ever and let me witness it – HAHA!”
Yet another torren of gunge poured down onto Holly Willoughby, who screamed again and tried to stand too quickly, only to fall backward and get a fresh coating. She breathed in a comical fashion and wiped her face a few times, looking around a little bit and finally seemed to have lost her nerve.
“THIS IS HORRIBLE…Ughhhh it’s horrible, it’s just horrible…and that God awful smell, it’s just – AGHHH!”
Holly was hit more gunge to the pleasure of the audience and all those on the podiums. She leaned forward trying to move from the gunge but a huge torrent once again engulfed her, doming over her head and completley coating her. She was incredibly humiliated. She could feel the gunge, cold and sticky, between her toes, her hair sopping with gunk and half sticking over her face. Her top was saturated and was clinging to her body. What was more, is that she could feel her shorts just as saturated, and was sure they had slipped down her knees a slight bit from the force of the dunking. The goo had already made it around her personal parts and she could feel the gunge right against her body; having gone down her top and against her bare skin and even into her bra where it was now pooling a little bit. She hated the gunge so much, each time she tried to wipe her face, it strung away in large globs and strands due to being very sticky, and it was cold despite being under the studio lights. Some parts of the gunge seemed to have congealed a lot more than she thought, as under some of the looser gunge, she could feel a little of it piling on top of her head. All she could smell was the stale stuff all around her, smelling like rotten eggs and slightly as though she were in the middle of a slurry. As she heard Dave talking again, she lowered back so the gunge was to her shoulders and shook her head, breathing heavily and feeling embarrassed beyond belief in front of the cameras.
“Ashleigh, Anne, you both win a another photo album of your time here, some novelty Comic Relief gear to take home, and you both win a trip to Alton Towers, free of charge, this summer! Fearne, and Jenna, Jenna where are you? There you are…thank you both for also returning for us – aghh!”
Both Jenna had walked up to join Dave,wearing a red nose each and with a couple of weak whipped cream pies, and both had given Dave a quick sandwhich pie.
“Thank you Dave, and that was a tiny bit of revenge for us both.”
“Well I guess I can’t argue too much with that – how about £10 for each of those two pies from me? Well that is it here from Get Your Own Back for today, and for this series. We will return as soon as you know it to your screens guning more adults and of course celebrities…and to any of you nasty adults out there, let a very stinky, smelly, sloppy, gungey Holly Willoughby down there to keep any promises you might have…Goodbye…Goodbye!…Yes!”
Dave, Fearne and Jenna all waved happily, with Dave quickly taking cream off his face and putting it on the two ladies. Ashleigh and Anne also waved, smiling big and wide, and Karen too gave waves to the cameras. Even Holly, who was no holding her nose, gave a weak wave, just before a fresh torrent once again washed over here, covered her all over again and giving her a proper coating to which she half wobbled and tried to escape from again before another torrent in front of her engulfed her one last time before the camera cut off.
The show ended with the usual VT of clips, and also some of the other celebrity gungings of the series, and was soon to return for a second series…
………….. ( A little bit extra…)
Dave walked in later that night exhausted. He reflected on how The New Get Your Own Back had been received well, many people loving the new formats and the new regular celebrity gungings every few episodes along. The next series was already being planned, people applying like mad to come on the show. Some even emailed Dave direct when they could, which he didn’t mind as he forwarded it on to who he needed to.
‘Only took nine years to get it back. I really do love doing my job.’
And it was true, he enjoyed the fun and wackiness of it, and the appreciation from the children. Even the rare admission of enjoyment from the adults was nice to hear too.
‘Nine years. How on earth did I last without it?’
He relaxed and turned on his laptop to have a look at his emails. Some were spam and one was again someone applying for the new series, but suddenly he stopped and noticed something. This was two young people wanting to get their own back on their babysitter. He was sure he had read a similar one the other night…
He sat for a few minutes and retraced his emails and found it. Two separate emails, both with two children wanting to get their own back on their young babysitters, one named Olivia, the other named Emma. Both had fallen victim to pranks in the past, but continued to babysit. Dave thought for a few moments.
‘…OH! They must really be open to being messy and having fun for the kids or else they wouldn’t have kept their jobs, brilliant!”
He quickly forwarded the email to his producers, totally misunderstanding the situations of both of the young ladies…
—
Sorry that it isn’t on Red Nose Day proper (we can’t all be perfect, right?) After this special, I will be stopping GYOB for a few weeks, and having a bit of a break due to a lot of stuff going on, and when it’s back I may still have stuff going on, so it could be that the episodes happen a little less.
The next episode will be along in a few weeks, and may be a non-vote one, as I had a great suggestion from TellyGunge, which I teased at the end of the story.
Voting stories will be returning though after that first episode. I have a few suggestions to chase up and decide on, but of course if there is a celebrity you feel deserves to be on GYOB, don’t hesitate to mention them!
Oh, and a quick thank you to all of those who have enjoyed and supported the New GYOB, I appreciate all the nice comments! – MsM
